Fear and Loathing in Upstate New York
Our special election-night Open Thread/Triumph of the Shill is less than ninety minutes away, but already supporters of Silly Party Conservative Doug Hoffman are starting up their drinking game — a swig for every hoax they announce:
“Hoffman Poll Watcher Has Tires Slashed,” blared Red State, with photos of the truck and its flat tire. And Hoffman himself chimed in.
“We just had a report that one of our pollsters in Clinton County just had their tires slashed,” Hoffman said. “So I think the Democrats are doing everything they possibly can to steal this election away from the 23rd District.”
But the local cops disagree: “This was not a tire slashing,” said the police captain. “This was some guy who drove over a bottle and cut his tire.”
On the other hand, Hoffmaniacs are “yelling anti-choice stuff at voters,” says a Demrat on the scene. “Apparently, there’s some woman claiming to be a commissioner. Commissioner of what, I don’t know. She’s from Texas, I think, and she won’t leave.”
Hoffman Camp, Right-Wing Bloggers Accuse Dems Of Slashing Supporter’s Car — Police Say He Drove Over Bottle [TPM]
Police Called To NY-23 Polling Sites [NY Daily News, via Think Progress]
Image: Ashley Todd Halloween Mask [Bloggerheads]
“We just had a report that one of our pollsters in Clinton County….”
Typical: Hoffman is trusting pollsters, when he should be trusting the people. THERE IS A WORLD OUTSIDE THE BELTWAY, HOFFMAN!!1!
DEVELOPING HARD: That racist Justice of the Peace down in Louisiana? Hanging up the skates. NBC reporting on the teevee just now that he has resigned.
DEVELOPING HARDER: Too early in Virginia — Knuckledragger leads.
OK Stinquers … I just clicked the link and spent a bit too much money for a Stinque hat. So get your gear on.
Put this on the fucking TV: Hoffman bit my ballsack after I paid him $5 to clean my asshole with his tongue in the parking lot of the Hannaford’s. Where’s the reporters when you need them?
@blogenfreude: I’m saving up for the travel mug. And I’m so glad nojo tastefully refrained from putting a subtitle on the thong.
@Mistress Cynica: Not that it didn’t cross my mind.
Relatives from Texas are like fish.
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! Sen. sENEMA has a career ahead of her in giving designer psychedelic enemas to trust-fund…
MANCHUCANDIDATE • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @¡Andrew!: She thought three's company. Nope.
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! Gawd hates SIN, specifically Kyrsten SINema.
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! So long, Senatard Glitter-trash. I hope she knows how much everyone H8s her :0)
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! The racist kleptocratic MSM is really gonna have to crank up the bread and circuses now that their…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @¡Andrew!: Ted Kazinski Sec of Interior Only the DEAD are extreme enough to serve in DONNIE…
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @FlyingChainSaw: Department of Health & Human Services: Charles Manson Defense Secretary:…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @¡Andrew!: Right, the administration's all star line up: Pres: Trump VP: Ted Kaczynski…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @FlyingChainSaw: Actually, FDLE would be the first to admit it. The state banks on it with 'sue me…
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! I cannot wait for the Republinazi MAGAt trash to DEMAND that $hitler be allowed to be president…