FEMA Camps Are Back, Baby!

The Wingnut Conspiracy Dartboard.

WorldNetDaily, master of the paranoid style in American blogging, is bringing back a Golden Oldie for the dog days of summer:

An ad campaign featured on a U.S. Army website seeking those who would be interested in being an “Internment/Resettlement” specialist is raising alarms across the country, generating concerns that there is some truth in those theories about domestic detention camps, a roundup of dissidents and a crackdown on “threatening” conservatives.

How they manage to fear a government they say can’t run a car-rebate program, much less socialized health care, is beyond us.

But let’s play along. The Army is indeed seeking Internment/Resettlement Specialists, which couldn’t possibly be related to two active wars. For that matter, they’re offering umpteen jobs in Helicopter Repair — including the fleet of Black Hawks that will surely be needed to hunt down Patriots like wolves in the Arctic.

YouTubist “jafount”, reporting from the secret fortress of his garage, is confident he’s found the “perfect storm”:

Basically we’ve got foreign troops on the ground, we’ve got the vaccination situation going on, and for all intents and purposes that’s setting them up to do the martial-law thing, and as a result of the martial-law thing, they’ll need internment/rehabilitation/reorganization/reeducation camp counselors out there.

If you weren’t awake before today, this is mainstream, guys.

And there we have to respectfully disagree. It’s not truly mainstream until Lou Dobbs picks up on it.

National Guard asked to explain ‘internment’ jobs [WND]

Can we just call these people absolute paranoid fucking idiots?
Barely functioning botards?

Having worked with such people, I can be pretty sure they’re have done the following:
1) Thought 2+2 =5 is geniuz
2) Imagine themselves smarter than any edumakated person
3) Maybe twice left their home town for travel
4) Only read at most 5 books (including that communist tome, Cat In The Hat) in their lifetime
5) Talks about using/applying common sense in everything
6) Wonders why no one understand they’re (sic) geniuz

I think we called this in the post election chatter. The black helos are back, baby.

@ManchuCandidate: The library probably includes the Turner Diaries.

as a result of the martial-law thing, they’ll need internment/rehabilitation/reorganization/reeducation camp counselors out there.

Oooh, I was a counselor at Camp Chosatonga my senior year in high school… wonder if that gives me a leg up in the application process. I mean let’s face it, once Obama’s Kenyan handlers decide to “activate” him, there’ll be two types of Americans: those guarding the concentration camps and those in the concentration camps. And I sure a heck would rather be one of the former than the latter.

I just got the brochure! For an extra $35, I can go to the Afrosupremist Shooting Gallery and take pot shots at white guys with their own confiscated weapons! Is this a great Marxist revolution or what?

@FlyingChainSaw: just wait until they institute Window Breaking Wednesdays. Officials from the Commerce Department will hand out stones to everyone, and the lucky few get bricks to aim at the multi-national bank or food/drink chain of their choice.

@Serolf Divad: I don’t know about preferring to be a guard in O’s concentration camps. You’d be guarding some very dangerous people. On the other hand, the horror of being a prisoner in one and having to spend all your time in the company of fundamentalist wingnuts would be unbearable.

@lynnlightfoot: Not to mention all the graba$$ going on in the mens’ showers. Would Beck become Rush’s beyatch, or the other way around?

It’s amazing that was was once fringe and esoteric (FEMA camps, shows on Masons and Illumaniti on the History Channel, Bohemian Grove article in Vanity Fair) is now becoming more mainstream. Next we’ll be seeing sacred geometry part of the 5th grade curriculum.

Of course, it’s all related to the stress and unease people feel at the dawn of a New Age or the coming of a new world order.

If Minidoka and Manzanar were good enough for Japanese Americans, they’re good enough for wingnuts. That black helicopter hovering overhead? It’s from the War Against Real Americans Relocation Authority and it’s homing in on the rfid chip planted in the cover of your copy of the Turner Diaries. I’ve already paid good money (Krugerrands) for a Kenyan birth certificate so I don’t get shipped to that dusty armpit known as southern Idaho.

Meanwhile, a Demrat socialist commie representative beefs up security for a town hall meeting tonight in Atlanta. Unruly teabaggers will be shipped to the Region IV FEMA camp HQ at Fort Gillem, where they will be subjected to endless repeated reruns of Love American Style until their eyeballs explode, while being forced to listen to sayings repeated from the Obamanist Manifesto Audacity of Hope until completely brainwashed.

Please note that the said representative is the replacement for Cynthia McKinney (G-Batshitcrazy), so the libtardery might be high.

You know what bothers me most about this? That some news researcher will pick this up and present it at an editorial meeting for a TV news channel, and there goes the late summer.

Anyone going to the Anaheim Harvest advertised on the WND site?


@RomeGirl: I would chew off a limb to get away from that shit.

@RomeGirl: Actually, I would hope it gets cable play — this stuff doesn’t get properly shot down until it’s flying in clear view.

@RomeGirl: I will go wearing a t-shirt that says, “Ask me where Jesus’ space ship is buried!”

@rptrcub: Are you attending to counter-protest, videotape wingnuts for YouTube and/or report for Stinque?

@blogenfreude: I am afraid I’d get stadium-sized church giggles.

@nojo: And so his sibilant esses can go manstream, baby. I give him 1.5 diapers, and he hasn’t even been scandalized yet.

@FlyingChainSaw: Or a FSM shirt.

@nojo: Hahhaaha I am awesome. And I obviously need to take a refreshing dive into a manstream near me.

@SanFranLefty: I am stuck with work, so sadly — no. My bad.

Add a Comment
Please log in to post a comment