Dear Thomas Van Flein: Sarah Palin is a Loser, a Quitter and a Whiner, and May Be a Crook

The Loch Lucille Monster.
Nice windows you got there, folks.

Sarah Palin’s lawyer celebrates the First Amendment with this Independence Day missive:

To the extent several websites, most notably liberal Alaska blogger Shannyn Moore, are now claiming as “fact” that Governor Palin resigned because she is “under federal investigation” for embezzlement or other criminal wrongdoing, we will be exploring legal options this week to address such defamation. This is to provide notice to Ms. Moore, and those who re-publish the defamation, such as Huffington Post, MSNBC, the New York Times and The Washington Post, that the Palins will not allow them to propagate defamatory material without answering to this in a court of law. The Alaska Constitution protects the right of free speech, while simultaneously holding those “responsible for the abuse of that right.” Alaska Constitution Art. I, Sec. 5. These falsehoods abuse the right to free speech; continuing to publish these falsehoods of criminal activity is reckless, done without any regard for the truth, and is actionable.

Falsehoods? What falsehoods?

Why, Mr. Van Flein couldn’t possibly be thinking of those pesky allegations that Mayor Palin arranged for some spillage from the Wasilla Sports Complex to help plug some holes in her new Lake Lucille mansion, could he?

If so, please add us to the list of troublemakers. We could use the publicity.

Palin attorney warns press on ‘defamatory material’ [Politico]

How dare they leave us off of the list. Take it to the hole Nojo!

It’s nothing new. Last fall I remember the Palins’ filching of building materials for their house being on the tips of many people’s tongues.

Van Flein is looking for opportunities to inflate his billable hours because he knows the gravy train he’s riding isn’t of long duration.

we can categorically state that we are not aware of any “federal investigation” that has been “pending” for the last seven years.

That’s a fudge phrase if I’ve ever seen one. Who says the investigation has been pending for seven years? Perhaps the allegations of misconduct only surfaced more recently?

The Alaska Constitution protects the right of free speech, while simultaneously holding those “responsible for the abuse of that right.”

Is this guy a member of the Alaska Independence Party like Palin’s husband? Why should he give a crap what the Alaska Constitution has to say about free speech? In these United States it is the First Amendment to the U.S. Constitution that governs speech, and as a public figure, Palin has very little recourse, legally speaking, to go after her critics on this matter.

As I understand it, libel laws are very lax in this country. Hooray!

Darling, I think you have in mind the bounceyball Sport expression which is more properly expressed, “Take it UP the hole, Nojo.” You’re welcome.

P.S. God that’s an ugly house.

Each time I read a wordy denial like that, it tells me one thing. For some reason, it’s not the word innocent.

BTW, the numerous trolls (all over the intertubes except here) defending Sarah yesterday reminds me of a great Simpson Episode (read: 1990s) where the Movementarians take over the entire town of Springfield. Everyone in the RW sphere falls under their trap till they find out that the Leader is a fraud. Everyone except cult deprogrammer/school janitor/nothing under his kilt wearing Scotsman Willie who remains a true believer.

@Benedick: And truth is an absolute defense, if I’m not mistaken.

Just think, Talibunny came this close to running Darth Cheney’s death squads.

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