Death Becomes Us
On this, the bicentennial of Darwin’s birth, we celebrate the 61 percent of Americans who either do not accept or have no opinion about evolution.
We celebrate the Brazilian priest who floated out to sea in a chair held aloft by hundreds of helium party balloons.
We celebrate the New York bird hunter who grabbed his loaded gun by the muzzle and started swinging it angrily at his dog, only to have it shoot him dead when it struck the ground instead.
We celebrate the Florida man who tried to “shoot the gap” of a rising drawbridge on his motorcycle, only to drown after the bridge’s safety gates knocked him off his Suzuki.
We celebrate the Pennsylvania man who wondered what would happen if he attached an electronic control tester to his chest piercings, only to learn the secret of the afterlife about five decades prematurely.
We celebrate the Cambodian man who was found naked after being kicked to death by the cow he was trying to fuck.
And we celebrate the Darwin Awards for bringing these stories to our attention, and for surviving fifteen years as one of the fittest sites on the Internet.