The Left Hand Points to Wasilla, the Right Hand to God
We’re still waiting for Bristol’s bastard to drop, but an ominous portent has appeared in Anchorage: Snowzilla, a 25-foot harbinger of doom.
Snowzilla magically appears each Christmas on the lawn of Billy Powers to delight visitors and frighten the neighbors, who don’t appreciate the extra traffic. The Scrooges at Anchorage City Hall tried to prevent “the building, enlargement, and any action associated with the construction of the extraordinarily large snowman,” but Snowzilla does not recognize the laws of mortals.
Rumors that Vladimir Putin can see Snowzilla from his house have not been confirmed.
Revenge of Snowzilla [Anchorage Daily News]
Left hand points to Russia: right hand points to God.
Carrot points to Chapped Ass, local Wasilla gay bar.
The right hand claims it; the left hand wafts it.
I think the “snow” is made from the frozen starbursts of Rich Lowry.
Who found the “carrot” in Bible Spice’s locked drawer?
This is the best, and probably most factual, quote from the article:
One of them, Barbara Hosier, included a note saying the snowman is “the best thing that ever happened in Anchorage.”
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FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! NOJO - HOW COME WE'RE NOT COVERING KRASNOV?