Blago Vetoes Boffo Sluggo

Title: Final Exits: The Illustrated Encyclopedia of How We Die

Author: Michael Largo

Rank: 20,723

Blurb: “Ants, bad words, Bingo, bean bag chairs, flying cows, frozen toilets, hiccups, lipstick, moray eels, road kill, starfish, and toupees are only some of the more unusual causes.”

Review: “It’s hard to pick my favorites, but I did especially love the one about the moron who climbed on top of a cage full of tigers and started using the bathroom.”

Frequently Bought Together: “The Executioner Always Chops Twice”, “5 People Who Died During Sex”, “Mortician Diaries”, “Stiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers”

Footnote: “Blagojevich bans Toughman competitions” is referenced as a news story in the bibliography: “In 2003, a twenty-four-year-old Sarasota, Florida, woman attempting to win the top prize — nothing more than a trophy and a Toughman jacket — died of hemorrhage.” America’s Favorite Governor (okay, second-favorite after Talibunny) banned the all-comer fights in January 2004, despite the mitigating fact that their most famous alumnus is Mr. T.

Final Exits: The Illustrated Encyclopedia of How We Die [Amazon]

Buy or Die [Stinque@Amazon kickback link]


No Alabama Fundie Preacher, and pal of Jerry Fallwell, hanging from the rafter wearing a crotchless wetsuit and dildos crammed up his ass?

@ManchuCandidate: Gary Aldridge … we will never see his like again. I can’t even recall a decent GOP hooker scandal this year. Of course, now that they’ve been repudiated, Republicans will probably be even less careful. I can only hope.

@blogenfreude: I fear for the economy’s effect on hooker expenditures. A WSJ survey has found that men are cutting back on the money they spend on their mistresses already.

@nojo re tweet: You suffered through Tennessee Ernie too? Wasn’t Xmas eve chez Mama without him and everyone’s favorite gay Marine Jim “Gomer Pyle” Nabors.

@Mistress Cynica: Sing we now of Christmas. Sing we here, Noel!

That and the annual Firestone albums. And the flocked tree that doesn’t come down until February. We considered it a success if we wrested it from Mom before Valentine’s Day.

@Mistress Cynica: And my father staggering out of a neighbor’s party, tanked to the gills, stamping up and down our very suburban road on New Year’s eve as it turned twelve playing the bagpipes and screaming “Wake up, you bastards!’ at all the darkened houses.

Happy times.

@Benedick: And then there was the year my drunken grandfather ran over a dog on the way to Xmas dinner and didn’t even slow down. And people wonder why I don’t celebrate this holiday.

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