Californidiocracy

We didn’t watch Idiocracy until recently, and well, it’s a little broad for our taste. It’s hard to do broad comedy in the Age of Irony — broad is vaudeville, and even Mel Brooks’ best work was well before 1980.

And yet as metaphor, if not as movie, Idiocracy is inescapable. Take the new Public Policy Institute of California survey of Prop 8 voters: Who was most willing to revoke the rights of their fellow citizens? Was it African Americans? Latinos? Republicans? Guess again:

Among Californians with a high school diploma or less, 69 percent voted for Proposition 8. Among college graduates, 57 percent voted against it.

Of course, Golden State Idiots didn’t succeed on their own — not without encouragement from two of the most authoritarian (and marriage-challenged) regimes in America:

San Francisco’s Roman Catholic archbishop says he invited leaders of the Mormon Church to get involved in the campaign to pass a gay marriage ban in California this year at the request of his fellow bishops.

It seems the real traditional marriage defended last month was between religion and ignorance. In which case, our metaphor falls short: It’s not idiocracy, it’s idiotheocracy.

Education and income were strong factors in vote against gay marriage [San Jose Mercury News]

Catholic leader sought Mormon help on Prop 8 [AP]

54 Comments

So the folks who don’t understand the consequences of TAKING someone’s civil rights were encouraged to vote against their long term interests by the church notorious world wide for kiddie diddling and the cult that is well known for polygamy, nepotism and magical underwear.

Yeah, that doesn’t sound like anything I’ve ever seen.

If one was allowed to write the epitaph for humanity, I would definitely look at: “Too stupid to survive.”

Wow, this is really twisted. Two cults conspired against the gays. I mean, what the fuck are the Catholics of California doing inviting the Mormons to anything except a fucking showdown in the Sierras. Dollars to donuts, the Bishop who organized the idea and invited the Mormons to help him stomp on marriage rights is a twisted altar-boy-raping pederast. Get a camera crew in front of that guy barking questions into his face like: you just jealous all these guys are getting fucked in the ass day in and day out and you aren’t? Is that it? Aren’t all you priest types kinda married to Jesus and shit?

@FlyingChainSaw: And what’s more, said bishop, George Niederauer, said they want us to stop calling them for what they are, and to find “common cause.” SF Chronicle:

“Tolerance, respect and trust are always two-way streets and tolerance, respect and trust often do not include agreement, or even approval. We need to be able to disagree without being disagreeable. … We need to stop hurling names like ‘bigot’ and ‘pervert’ at each other. And we need to stop it now.”

This is more than just a mere “disagreement.” My tolerance toward you and your ilk, padre, is limited to not doing anything illegal to you or your facilities at this point. You conspired to rip away a right in collusion with another denomination. You have declared war on us yet again, and so don’t be alarmed at retaliation.

Frankly, padre, you can kiss my faggoty ass. (And yes, I’m totes not helping. And I’m totally encouraging rhetorical mutually assured destruction. Fuck him with the Oakland Raiders.) Tax the church at 75%.

Sorry, I woke up with a pounding headache and I’m not in the mood to sing kumbayah this morning.

@rptrcub:
It’s pretty hard to find common cause if one sees one’s mere existence as a threat to life as we know it.

Nuanced positions only work if you see shades of grey, not the harsh digital realm of Good/Evil.

@rptrcub: No need to talk to them. Just keep petitioning for the cults’ 501c3s to be pulled. Put that on the ballot. California needs the money. The only real threat is if the petitions get traction and the California church feels threatened, Niederauer may ask for an armed uprising of the faithful in the West and Mexico to defend it. Who knows, thousands of twisted former abused altar boys may rise to join the Gay Brigades.

@FlyingChainSaw: this is more than fair.

If the polygamists and the regular violators of their own vows want to tell their congregations how they should vote and proselytize from the pulpit, then they can suck it up and pay taxes on those tithings.

@nojo: Broad? Borat is broad and brilliant. And the Founders did nothing but complain about the stupidity of the population: which is why they limited the right to vote. Even the Athenians complained about how stupid people were and how said stupidity undermined democracy. As I understand it it wasn’t stupidity that sank Athens it was hubris: the campaign against Sicily and subsequent war with Sparta. Think Iraq: think economic collapse. The stupids, like the poor, have always been with us and always will be. These voting demographics are very similar to the recent election of blessed memory: the educated class voted for Hopey; the uneducated class voted for the White Guy.

@FlyingChainSaw: Run all the Catholics into Utah and let them have their own little hatefest with the Wearers of the Holy Underwear. Fence the fucker off and throw all the other haters in there.

@rptrcub: Name calling. Right. Because a bunch of homos calling the Catho-Mormon puppeteers bigots is TOTALLY the equivalent of them calling us perverts. Oh yeah, and systematically preaching, organizing and campaigning to strip us of our civil rights and instill hatred and crime against us in their followers. I love people that have no concept of ‘power’ (reverse-racism idiots, I’m looking at you). Just kidding, I actually hate them.

Thanks Nojo – this was a great way for me to go from sleepy to wide awake this morning, and I need that today.

@homofascist: You need to start a Ban Catholicism Now! petition in California.

@FlyingChainSaw: I think it’s the very real and organized campaign lobbying the IRS and the California FTB (whatever the acronym is for our state IRS) that has the Catholic and Mormon churches’ panties in a wad, and not so much being called “bigot” or “intolerant” which they’ve been called for quite some while. There are hundreds (if not thousands at this point) of complaints being filed with both agencies demanding they investigate the tax status and activity. With Black Eagle’s administration coming to town in DC, they won’t get the same wink-and-nod, “carry on” that they’ve been getting from the IRS for the past 8 years.

It’s the money that they care about. They may say their widdle feelings are hurt by being called mean names, but it’s all about the dinero in the collection plate, and FSM knows the Catholics are a little squeezed for cash now anyway, what with all the multi-million dollar payouts for raping little boys.

TJ/
At least we can all self-medicate in California – Happy 75th Anniversary to the 21st Amendment! We’re having a parade in San Francisco today! I love the old photos of the trucks with liquor parked in the middle of Civic Center.

The level of dumbassery here in Cal increases exponentially as you get farther from SF or LA.

@SanFranLefty: They need an occasion in SF to celebrate alcohol?

@SanFranLefty: It’s the Financial Services Squadron of the Homofascist Brigades to the rescue!

My theory is that its the stupid, the lazy, and the criminal, who are attracted to the warm places, Florida, California, and the Southwest. I’m talking about migration patterns, its the “Midnight Cowboy” syndrome, look at them two fine citizens and their dream of moving where the sun is shining, going where the weather suits their clothes. And the fucking crime in those places, the constant 7-11 and gas station robberies, desperado robberies with gunplay for a $20 reward. That shit simply DOES NOT HAPPEN in New Jersey. Like, fucking never. That kind of stupid and vicious criminal moves to someplace warm.

@SanFranLefty: Yeah, and now they have to have little boys smuggled in from overseas for their pederast orgies. Tough times all over.

@Prommie:
Get out of my head!!!

Although I’ve yet to come up with a useful explanation for Alberta and Alaska besides huge immigration of wingnuts.

@ManchuCandidate: It must be the fact that some of the people living in the province and state, respectively, are immigrants from Tejas and the oil industry. The only US-American immigrant member of the Canadian Parliament (I had to do some comparative political system research in college) that I found was a guy who was born in Texas and was with the former Reform Party (now part of Fatty McGoo’s Conservatives), from Alberta.

@rptrcub:
That is part of it especially the tax cutting/crime crushing part.

I think it’s also that most of the history of Alberta were, in many ways, similar to the US history minus the Indian Wars (not to say we didn’t screw over our natives–we did and did it well as Apartied was based on our system of “reserves.”) Lots of poorly educated highly religious immigrant farmers who resented (and with some good justification) the hell out of authority and those they considered eelights.

When oil was discovered, they acted like the nouveau riche. Problem is some 50 years later they still act like it.

SanFranLefty: There was a story in the paper this AM about how the Womens’ Temperance Union is still active. That’s nice. Make mine a Manhattan please. With extra liquor.

homofascist: Not for nothing, but the Christian Coalition is bitching about how the Freedom From Religion Foundation (who I don’t particularly like — something Code Pinkish about the whole thing) are putting up atheist-themed signs next to Nativity displays on state property. Uh. Huh.

Could someone clue the thumpers into the fact that (a) more than 80% of Americans, of their own free will, kinda sorta agree with them on the big points, (b) anybody above the age of, oh, six knows the Christmas Story (and the Easter Story, incidentally) by heart and understand basically what is claimed, and (c) neither Christmas nor opposite-sex marriages are under any threat beyond the one they have devised for their own ends? Kthx.

@ManchuCandidate: Pierre Trudeau had the right idea. Bleed those fuckers dry.

Mrs RML and her mom are Catholic and are not of the hating variety. We had a gay bridesmaid. We are teaching Son of RML to be cool with everyone, not just “tolerance.” I tell him not to hate groups of people, but that you can go ahead and not like someone as an individual after you get to know them ‘cept for wingnuts who are not related to us. You can just hate on them from the get go. As for our right wing relatives, it’s love the person, mock the ideology and their hypocrisy.

BTW, the boy loved Jack Black as Jesus.

@redmanlaw: I sorely wish that women could take over and run the Catholic church. Wouldn’t have nearly as many problems. As much as the theocracy and established church itself makes me postal, I know a couple of kick-ass funny as shit Benedictine nuns who do amazing work with kids nobody cares about, and some terrific Catholic women who are active in Catholics for a Free Choice and the ordination of women efforts.

@homofascist: And they’ve got an NYT ad whining about how we’re protesting them, and that we’re all burning their churches.

@redmanlaw: And the Christofascists are protesting the Prop 8 musical.

@Prommie:
i resemble that remark! i have always sought the Sun.
does moving to the tinderbox of the planet vindicate me?
i think i’m a tough chick, and i am by american standards. over there, i am a sniveling chicken huddled in a fetal position every time i hear a car engine backfire or car alarm go off. so if i am an undesireable for loving warm weather, that’s all about to change. i’m scared and excited about this life changing experience i’m about to embark.
i’ll take you all with me, with reports from the ground, and lefty had an excellent idea. i’ll send in photo’s of hottie soldiers i’m considering and you all will vote, we’ll play Israeli Hottie Idol!

@baked: mmmm… Israeli soldiers… gallrghlh….

@baked: Not you, not you, oh no, Baked, I was talking about those other sorts, you know them, I think the best way to describe them would be “the kind of people who move to Pheonix.”

@Benedick: I said hard, not impossible.

But if you’ll permit me to go Scholastic on yer ass, I’m not sure Borat fits the category. It’s more a satiric documentary than a broad comedy.

To elucidate: Blazing Saddles is a classic mix of satire and broad comedy. Airplane is classic contemporary broad comedy. But Mel Brooks and ZAZ faltered in their later years — the Naked Gun movies don’t have the snap of Police Squad, for example.

It’s hard to do broad. Comedians fear being “on the nose,” for good reason.

@nojo: The OJ death scene in a Naked Gun movie was awesome, however.

@redmanlaw: The word tolerance I always felt frightening as in: “You piece of fucking shit, God knows the right thing to do is to rip off your fucking head and shit down the hole but I am fucking tolerant.” What’s wrong with the concept of ‘mutual awe’.

@baked: Travel and pestork with wanton abandon!

@redmanlaw: Didn’t it involve, in part, a wheelchair and a flight of stairs?

@redmanlaw: Ah, ok, was confusing it with the stadium scene in the other (?) Naked Gun movie.

@SanFranLefty: Jim Rome is all over it this morning.

Free Speech for the Dumb: Free metallica concert downloads are available at an official band website, for those of you that may be interested, at http://www.livemetallica.com/catalog.aspx?doVault=1

redmanlaw: I stopped listening to him a few years back. (Not out of animus — it’s just that I became employed.) Anyway: I am fairly certain that there were all manner of Orenthal blasts today. It might be a national holiday for The Clones.

@SanFranLefty: Hilarious. The Goldmans and Browns will have the pleasure of seeing OJ stomped to death by neo-Nazis in jail. He’ll go like Father Geoghan. Should we do an item on this and start a Stinque death watch for OJ? Maybe a pool to bet which day a neo-Nazi’s boot will crush the former NFL star’s dim widdoo head?

@FlyingChainSaw: I’d rather do a pool on how soon before Dominic Dunne keels over. He’s battling cancer and looks like shit and I was wondering if he was holding on just long enough to see O.J. finally sent to prison for something.

@chicago bureau: The Clones are really restrained today. Just an odd email or two referencing a new soundbite. Lately, though, martini talk can easily go an hour when Rome goes off on his love of Sapphire on the weekend.

Rome streams for free on a lot of stations now. You don’t have to subscribe at jimrome.com anymore. I listen at 610thesportsanimal.com from 10-1 Mtn time, then ESPN until Rachel Maddow live at 4 pm Mtn

@SanFranLefty: Poor guy. Sounds like he showed up for work in this life.

@SanFranLefty: To me he is just a high-toned version of that krazeee blond hyperventilating crime-harridan on CNN, Nancy Grace. Masturbating to fantasies of people you don’t like getting prison-raped ain’t healthy. Its misdirected animosity.

@Prommie: Masturbating to fantasies of people you don’t like getting prison-raped ain’t healthy.

Now you tell me.

Harry Shearer also covered the original trial, so he’ll likely have a few words about this during his Sunday morning radio show. (10 a.m. PT via kcrw.com’s online feed, if you want it live. It’s the only alarm I set all week.)

Thank you, fellow U.S. Americans who own the Santa Fe National Forest where I’m going to cut firewood tomorrow with my kid and parents. I’m also taking a couple of Christmas trees from there. I picked up a tree permit today for my friend from Mexico, too, if that’s OK.

@redmanlaw: De nada. Weren’t we just renting it from your people and the Messicans anyway?

@baked: IDF guys (and a couple chix, tambien).

http://doubletapper.blogspot.com/2008/12/idf-sniper-training.html

Scroll down to the bottom to top tags for “idf” and “israel” for more.

@redmanlaw:

Holy caca, the IDF chicks are even hawter than the men, if that’s possible. If it would piss of RatBastard even more, then maybe we should nominate some Israeli Army chix for baked’s competition.

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