Pud Pulling for Jesus?
The Chief Financial Officer of a Jesus-crazed Ohio university was arrested on Saturday for jumping into a car and grabbing a cop by the gonads in an apparent attempt to give him a hand job in the middle of a city park, the stupid fuck, police allege.
The fuckwit in question, Cincinnati Christian University CFO Robert Williams, 52, of Independence, was arrested at 9:23 a.m., accused of getting into a undercover cop’s car and mauling the constable’s genitals.
WLWT.com reported that University president David Faust said, “This is a personal tragedy for him and for his family, and we lift him up in our prayers,” Faust said, as if that would stop Williams from lifting up his dick to show strange guys in city parks.
Hilariously, the students, typical insane Jesus fucktards, thought it was all about Satan fucking with their heads. “I view it either one of two ways,” said student Daniel Read. “Either we’re doing something wrong, or as a Christian university we’re doing something right and the devil’s attacking us.”
WCPO.com report that Williams entered a written plea of not guilty on Monday. If the Jesus-crazed man-stalker is found guilty, the TV station reported, he could face up to two months in jail, with thousands of guys who might want a hand job. That’s why it’s called Justice.