FlyingChainSaw’s Basement Tapes

Character assassin to the stars FlyingChainSaw writes on the fly, and leaves a lot of abandoned drafts scattered in the Stinque editorial chambers. These stories may not be happening, but an FCS headline is a terrible thing to waste.

  • Palin’s Mayoral Administration: Tyrannous Reign of Political Greasing and Wanton Adulterous Pestorking
  • Talibunny and Psychogeezer’s Crusade of Hate, Fear & Rage Goes Completely Nazi To Mobilize the Adkisson Brigades
  • Desperate Traitorous Dog Psychogeezer Begging Bin Ladin to Attack America to Turn Around His Travelling Fashion Show
  • Talibunny Going Fucking Nuts!
  • Fascist Pederasts’ Heads Exploding
  • Adkisson Brigades Clearing Gun Stores of Semi-Automatic Weapons and Ammo
Image: Privacy International Big Brother Award

Disregard prior question, false rumor. Where is my fucking mystery 80s girl, dammit?

@Prommie: Enough already about the fucking avatar!*

Go to and make sure you changed it using the same email address with which you’re registered here. Wait a few days. Refresh your cache. Go cook something. Post more food porn.


*And I say that with great love, Prommie. My favorite avatar of yours was the snorg girl. Though the doggy bartender is a close second.

Also: Our new presndint’s Secret Service code is Renegade. I like it. How about we use that now instead of Unicorn? Michelle is Renaissance, which is totes classier than Laura — Tempo.

@Jamie Sommers: New Hampshire: number 1 in the nation for cranky old people.

Is there any way W and Cheney can both resign and let Hopey take over early?

The ‘conomy is dying, W is taking to the airwaves this afternoon to calm our fears, and you all know there is nothing more likely to cause a panic than W speaking to the nation and telling people he’s working on the problem.

@Prommie: That would mean Nancy Pelosi, that evil San Fran libruhl, would be a caretaker president and could help push a raft of evil libruhl legislation before Renegade takes over. I likes it. But please wait until after the Dec. 2 runoffs here so they can’t use that SF bullshit against Jim Martin.

On that account: Nancy for Number 44! Barry for 45!

@rptrcub: And the girls are Radiance and Rosebud. Makes me so happy!

@JNOV: Did you see that Talibunny and First Dude were Denali and Driller, respectively?

@SanFranLefty: Hehhehhe… “Driller.” eheheheh… [/8-year-old boy].

That reminds me, I’m having trouble keeping a straight face when my editor here told me to “go fill your hole” (as in story space). We also apparently laugh like 8-year-olds when I mention a story I wrote about intravaginal rings (srsly, a way to release birth control and possibly HIV preventatives in the future).

@rptrcub: Well, that explains why they loved the Geezer so much.

@SanFranLefty: Oh perfect. Those GMC Denalis are a piece of shit.

@Jamie Sommers: Cool as a weekend rental for an out of town wedding, though, such as the one we had in Seattle a couple of years ago. Son of RML got to ride in the stretch Hummer with the bridal party as a ring bearer for a Buddhist wedding.

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