Psychogeezer’s Oracle, Joe the Plumber, Accuses Obama of Being Traitorous Dog

Retarded Bald Guy With No Income and Probably Pays No Tax Expresses Outrage at Obama Proposing to Tax Him When He Becomes A Millionaire

Daffy, Broke, Twice-Wifeless Joe Rages at Obama for Proposing to Tax Him When He Becomes a Billionaire

Joe the Plumber, the twice divorced babbling twit from Ohio that the Psychogeezer campaign has adopted as a combination demented house pet, economic advisor and spokesperson apparently keeps his head shaved because it makes it real easy to slick it up with transmission fluid and shove it up his own ass when he speaks, making him the perfect guest for Fox News.

Fox News’ Neil Cavuto, booking the Psychogeezer’s bus clown onto his show yesterday for savage amusement, got the lawless tradesman (who operates without a license) to admit he makes “nowhere near” $100,000. First, it proves he is, obviously, a penurious asshole no one would ever need to talk to, especially a conservative hate hurler like Cavuto. Second, what of his outrage about his taxes going up on his $250,000 income? Not going to happen in his lifetime. Cavuto, as stupid as Talibunny’s bus trip love interest, didn’t ask.

Then fuckface decides it’s time to go after Obama as a traitorous monster who is against everything good and decent in America.  Intoning with all the gravitas a fucking retard like this can muster, Joe glared at the camera, “Oh you know, his ideology is something that is completely different than what democracy stands for, so I had some question there. In my opinion.”

Psychogeezer would be far better served by depanting Trig Palin, drawing eyeglasses and a moustache on his ass and letting him blast green, chunky milk farts in response to questions from journalists.

How stupid is Joe? As intelligent as you’d expect any guy to be who talks with his head stuffed up his ass. How stupid is Neil? As fuckwitted as any asshole who works for a criminal cult like Fox News. Clearly, however, the biggest dummy is Psychogeezer for allowing a blithering fuckwit like this to speak on his behalf.

Psychogeezer would be far better served by depanting Trig Palin, drawing eyeglasses and a moustache on his ass and letting him blast green, chunky milk farts in response to questions from journalists than letting this dimwitted loser represent him.

Hey, Joe, did Talibunny let you eat her panties yet? Let you clean her hotel toilet seat with your tongue? No? Hahahahahahaha.

89 comments:

6:22 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

Vivid as always, FCS.

6:30 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

This is just another side show act of what has been a freak show of presidential politics. Just when I think the electoral process can’t be denigrated or trivialized any further…lo and behold they lower the bar. I am truly fucking aghast and impressed with the fucktards that have elbowed their ways into the limelight to cash in on notoriety and promote their self enrichment over the national good.

The arrogance of his statement about the definition of democracy is incredible. He wouldn’t know a democracy if it bit him on his ample self serving ass.

6:40 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@AARPrick: This pretty much sums it up for me: Just when I think the electoral process can’t be denigrated or trivialized any further…lo and behold they lower the bar.

6:57 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

Joe the Plumber really reminds me of Jeff Gannon.

Just thought I’d share this thought with y’all.

7:03 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@SanFranLefty: Oy. What are you hearing about Prop 8 up in SF?

7:14 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@Dodgerblue:
Re: Prop 8 – What I heard at the training in SF this weekend is that they think that it will be won or lost in Alameda County. Did you see the black church mailer the Yes on 8 people sent out? So I’m going to be at a polling place in Oakland at 6:30 am handing out the No on 8 flyers saying our talking points, “This isn’t about what you think about gays or gay marriage, this is about stripping people of their civil rights.”

Then I’m going to start drinking at 1 pm when my shift ends. Drinking will begin in Oakland and end in SF. I should not drink on BART on my way back in to The City. I will be sending in photos throughout the day to the Election Jam and commentary updates via txt msg to Nojo, as I don’t have one of those fancy pants iPhones or Crackberries.

7:19 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

FCS. Don’t hold back.

7:34 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@SanFranLefty:

Separated at birth?

7:40 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

FCS … nice.

And yes, I am going out at 6 am to walk the block to my polling place on the Upper West Side to cast a vote that is meaningless. Obama would carry my ZIP code by a wide margin without me, but I want to say to anyone that will listen that I voted for him.

7:41 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@SanFranLefty: Good luck. I think it’s gonna be close.

7:41 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@AARPrick:
agreeing wholeheartedly. i said yesterday there is no bottom.
these are goddamn carney folk with a disgusting illegal sideshow.
lower than a snakes balls.

7:43 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

BTW, speaking of the economic apocalypse, GM sales were down forty-fucking-five percent in Oct compared to last year. Good time to buy that Corvette I’ve always wanted?

7:50 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@Dodgerblue: If you have no debt, it’s a great time to be here – better if you’ve invested heavily in Euros like Cheney.

7:51 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@Dodgerblue: A shame, b/c at last GM is building cars people might want to buy (new Malibu, for instance). If they’d done a Camry back in 1988, we would not be having this discussion.

7:52 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

This guy is such a total asswipe. Nobody has gone back and looked at his actual Encounter with Hope ™, wherein Barry handled him with grace and eloquence and quite frankly schooled his no-neck Buckeye ass. His body language was all “ooh, this guy is using WORDS and shit” with his arms crossed, sweat poring off that gleaming dome.

Joe. The. Fucking. Plumber. If we remember 2008 for this ass-hat, we are totally doomed.

ADD: I’m pissed about Toot. That’s really fucking unfair.

7:56 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@FlyingChainSaw: Actually, we were lucky to unload the missus’ euros this summer when they were at their peak. Close to parity with the slimeback now, aren’t they?

8:03 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@nabisco: Obama should have beat the living fuck out of him, kicked him unconscious, pissed on his face and told him his former wives are having a great time in four ways with him and Michelle. Fuckface’s posture was, “Fuck you, Sen. Sambo, fuck you! Who the fuck are you to be running my fucking country, you fuck?” If Obama is curling 70 lbs, he should have been able to dislocate Joe’s jaw in one swing and had his skull in splinters wtih another.

How much you want to bet Talibunny uses him for a footrest on bus trips?

8:09 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

Psychogeezer would be far better served by depanting Trig Palin, drawing eyeglasses and a moustache on his ass and letting him blast green, chunky milk farts in response to questions from journalists.

It’s funny cuz it’s true!

@SanFranLefty: omg, you’re so right. Ew.

9:43 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@Dodgerblue: Even down 45,000, they beat Toyota in sales by 20,000, near 170,000 to near 150,000. The Lion’s share of the losses is in SUVs. And the imports sales of gas guzzlers suffered badly, too. We cannot let our auto industry die, it will take them 18 months to retool and bring more fuel efficient cars to the market, and I don’t mean more fuel efficient, I mean more models of fuel efficient, there are great fuel efficient american cars. They will survive with a little help, one-tenth what we gave the financial industry, and they actually MAKE SOMETHING. They employ workers, union workers. This is the last of our heavy manufacturing industry, as Boeing is outsourcing to China, we need them, or else we got bupkis.

9:46 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@blogenfreude: They have been making Camry’s for a decade, they have, but noone wanted a good, peppy mid-sized sedan. I have driven a dozen mid-sized GM sedans as rentals in the last ten years, and every time I have been donwright amazed, they were good cars.

9:50 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@baked: There is a bottom, this is it, Baked, time is out, its all over but counting the votes, and PG is toast. Only turnout and vote-stealing can make a difference now, bad weather on the east coast my hurt in VA and NC, but the numbers are bad for PG everywhere. Its over and we got it.

Tomorrow, I may hunt down some caviar. I can afford an ounce of Sevruga, and I have a bottle of Vueve, and then I will get a truffle, even at $200 a pound, a single truffle is only $5.00, and I will make a truffle omellette. That will be my celebration. If I can get to a Wegmans. Nearest one is 50 miles.

9:57 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

Is anyone else tremendously relieved? THE CAMPAIGN IS OVER. Nothing can happen now. Its too late. Tomorrow’s headlines are written, as of right now. There are no surprises. Short of a suitcase nuke or a dirty bomb exploding overnight somewhere, and thats not a possibility, its OVER. Its like musical chairs, the music stopped while we were ahead, and its fucking over.

I know I am going to be telling my grandkids about tomorrow, where I was, where I voted, when I heard, I know it, and I will be soaking in every moment. Its 4th and 35 for geezer, in his own 20, down by three scores, with 30 seconds on the clock. TURN OUT THE LIGHTS, THE PARTY’S OVER, in the immortal words of that guy from MNF.

10:05 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

Totes TJ, but Georgia’s version of Katherine Harris is reminding people that even accepting those free Starbucks coffees in exchange for saying you’ve voted is illegal and will get you put in prison.

Georgia Code Section 21-2-570 states:

Any person who gives or receives, or offers to give or receive, or participates in the giving or receiving of money or gifts for the purpose of registering as a voter, voting, or voting for a particular candidate in any primary or election shall be guilty of a felony.

God I hate that woman so bad right now, ever the more since she refused to extend early voting.

10:12 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@Promnight: Don’t go dancing on the 10. I’m not celebrating until Keith calls it.

10:16 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

Oh, and I’ve been having fun today: New browser icon! New iPhone icon!

Plus: You see that fancy Google electoral map over at TPM? We’ve got it too, starting Tuesday at 7 p.m. Eastern.

10:17 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@Promnight: Shut your mouth, Leon Lett. I’ve been over on 270towin devising ways this could go wrong.

@rptrcub: I guess we should be glad she posted a warning rather than just going in and arresting baristas.

10:28 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

He gonna win by more than the polls are showing, in popular vote. Some of the hopeful surprises, like Georgia, maybe even North Carolina, won’t happen.

Here is a word for you. “Landslide”

I am hearing Boz Scaggs, singing to McCain “why can’t you just get it through your head, its over its over now.” I am hearing the Dixie Chicks singing Landslide. I am there now, no more doubt, no more fear.

Oh, I got my fingers crossed as I say this, but, superstition is bad, I should try to get over it.

The handwriting is on the fucking wall. Mene mene tekel upharsin. If I remember it correctly.

10:47 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

Anyone wanna take a stab at talking me down? My dad and Jr have already tried, but they weren’t successful. Here’s my issue: For the first time ever I’m afraid to vote. I think you all know that I have anxiety issues as it is, and now I’m imagining people fucking with my kid at the polls tomorrow. This is the place where the poll workers said they bet they knew who my kid was voting for in the primary because he’s black. They didn’t say the “because he’s black” part, but that’s what they meant.

So now I’m getting agita and all kinds of anxiety because I’m scared something shady is going to happen — that someone is going to call him and me names and, I don’t know, maybe bring a gun. I know it sounds ridiculous, but these are my fears. I’ve even imagined what it feels like to be shot because I have come unhinged.

Totally and completely unhinged and scared to death. I even told my kid maybe we should sit this election out, and he said that if we do, the fucktards win. He’s being perfectly reasonable, and I’m being perfectly unreasonable, and my dad said that if I don’t calm down, I’m going to be taking innocuous behavior as threatening.

He is making sense, too, but you know what is fucked up about GAD? You get anxious over ridiculous stuff. Like someone is going to shoot me tomorrow. Totally crazy, right? But the fear is real no matter how crazy, and I’m thinking about letting Jr sleep through tomorrow, cuz god knows he isn’t waking up on his own. I am now a coward.

10:48 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@Promnight: I’m not coming out of the cellar till PG concedes. Unless I go buy more daffodil bulbs tomorrow. A local store is selling the good stuff at half price. I bought a hundred today. I may go back tomorrow for another 300. Then I can plant them tomorrow with Hope.

@SanFranLefty: Good for you with the volunteering. Good luck tomorrow.

11:00 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@JNOV: Walk tall. Ever see the Dog Whisperer, Cesar Milan? You are he. Calm and assertive. Walk tall, take no crap.

11:01 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

By this time next month, the fucking Unicorn will be on the TV describing the fucking charges for the crimes against humanity he will be pressing against Caligutard and his crime boss, Cheney, the neocon death cult and the RNC.

By this time next year, the Unicorn will be leaning over fucking Caligutard, strapped to the gurney, describing how he is going to die, inches from his nose.

“I know who is waiting for you, Georgie. Fucking Satan, with a big barbed dick to shove in your asshole. Victor Ashe will be jealous of the ass fucking you gonna get from the devil, YOU FUCK! [grabbing his hair and turning his head face up] See this fucking syringe? See it, you worthless piece of fucking shit? See it? Smile, asshole, when I talking to you. This is potassium fucking chloride. It kills assholes like you but not nearly painfully enough. ‘supposed to go into a vein. I’m going to stick it in your fucking eyeball and inject it straight into your fucking brain, if I can find the fucking pea you use for a brain. It will take 12 hours for you to fucking die. I am going to watch. I brought a fucking sandwich and my iPod. You listening to me, asshole? Smile. . . Or you can choose door number 2. You call me, Mr President, Sir and admit, ‘Mr. President, Sir, I am honored that a glorious man of the people will send me to hell for my crimes’ and I will just pour this can of gasoline over you and light you up. You dead in 15-20 minutes. Or you tell me where Cheney is keeping the money and I blow your fucking brains out with this Sears over/under. You dead in 5-10 seconds. Any way, I am thoroughly entertained. You been president, you know how important that is, right, fuckface? What’s that, asshole? ‘Pweese, pweese, don’t kill me, mistah pres’dint?’ Hahahahahahahahahahaha. Hahahahahahahahahaha. [grabbing his ears and pounding his head on the gurney] How you want it? How you want it? How you want it? How you want it? How you want it? How you want it? Tell me, asshole! Satan is waiting!”

11:02 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@JNOV: You just gotta vote, every vote, JNOV, please vote. Nothing is gonna happen to people at the polls, its gonna happen to their ballots after they cast them, and the more Obama votes, the more they have to steal, and if its too many, no matter how much stealing they do, they won’t be able to overcome it. PA is critical, use all the meds necessary, do it girl.

11:04 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@Promnight: “Amazed” is most of the problem. Nobody believes they are any good. Here on the left coast, you see a bazillion Priuses (Mrs. DB drives one) and Subies (I drive an Outback), Hondas and Toyotas, but damned few Chevies. I was always a Chevy guy as a teen, didn’t like the Mustangs, drove a Malibu SS with the 327 4-barrel, worshipped the Vette. I still love the sound of a big V-8 going flat out.

11:05 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@JNOV: First, let me say that I am in no way mocking or minimizing your fears. I’ve suffered GAD, and it’s one reason I take SSRIs and Xanax (Do you have any of that BTW? Now would be a good time for one). Your fear may not be realistic, but it is real to you. So what do you do about it? If you give into that fear, you will never forgive yourself and Jr will never forgive you. You have to do this. Let’s break this down. Guns or violence at the polls? Highly unlikely. Sure there’s a chance, but there’s also a chance that a plane will crash on your house and a much better chance of being in an accident on the way to the polls. Next item: JNOV Jr being called names or hassled at the polls. Since he’s 19 years old, I’m sure he’s been called plenty of ugly things over the years. Most kids, whether biracial or not, have been. Sure, words would hurt, but you would both survive. If his eligibility to vote is questioned? You have the phone numbers. Lawyers are standing by.
You will get through this. You and Jr will vote. No one will stop you from doing this, because people fought and died for your right to do it. You cannot deny your son the chance to help elect a man who is biracial like him president. You cannot let “them” win. If you stay home, their intimidation tactics have worked, and you have allowed them to disenfranchise you. From what I’ve seen, you’re way too much of a fighter to let that happen.
You know when I gave up being scared all the time? When I was lying on the floor surrounded by broken glass after the OKC bombing blew a window in on me. That’s when it became crystal clear that there was no point in worrying about what might happen, because anything could happen at any time.
You will be fine. You will do breathing exercises, count to ten before reacting to anything, and take a tranquilizer if you have one, but you will vote. And then you will be very, very happy. Group hug!

11:05 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@Lyndon LaDouche: I just hope I hear from you, out of the cellar and freaking and happy, before I have to go to bed tomorrow.

To all my stinkers, I am gonna need you tomorrow night, will we all be virtually sharing history? I am all alone, Mrs., who already cast her absentee, is off on business and Jr. is with grandparents.

Its just gonna be me and my Vueve and my sevruga, I need someone to hold my hand. Lots of people.

11:06 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@Lyndon LaDouche: I’m not coming out until the military has been out of site for a week after the election, PG has conceded and Bush and Cheney have committed suicide and the military has been completely absent from the proceedings for three months. Palin will be in the hill running exercises with the neo-Nazi militia but I think state National Guards will be able to handle them in most states.

11:08 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@Dodgerblue: Nothing like a GM 350. Had a ’74 Le Mans that could cruise quietly at 110. Felt like you were in your living room with the radio on. Positraction made it a fun car to drive in deep snow.

11:13 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@Promnight: I’ll be here with my pizza and cheap red wine.

11:17 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@JNOV: Nobody is going to shoot you, my love, but I totally understand getting anxious over irrational ideas. Think sexy thoughts! Surf some pron or something, that always works for me, but I’m easily distracted and so use it to my advantage. Tell anyone that if they start shit, they will face drunken clown wrath that will make Heath Ledger’s Joker look like Ronald McDonald.

11:18 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@JNOV: YOU AND JNOV JR MUST VOTE! If you haven’t by noon, email me and I’ll come pick you up and take you to the polls. You have my email in meatspace, use it if you’re still panicky in the AM.

We do NOT leave Stinquers behind.

11:28 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@Promnight: I will be here! We have a bunch of friends coming over to party/watch the proceedings but jeez you bring the fancy, champagne and caviar? (okay I had to google sevruga and vueve to know what you were talking about) Here it’s gonna be Sierra porter and Dick’s cheeseburgers.

11:31 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

Wow. You guys got me to crack a smile when it’s the last thing I feel like doing. We’re heading out slightly before 7 am. We don’t have lawn chairs, so we’ll just sit on the ground if we get tired. I’ll come back and report after the deed is done. Thank you for not making me feel any crazier than I do already. This is the first time in two weeks that I’ve thought about voting without freaking out. Yay! And I’m definitely dosing myself before I head out tomorrow. The boy can drive.

11:37 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@drinkyclown: Here, I’ll sniff gasoline until I am completely out of control and then drive into the night to tear up Psychogeezer signs and finally to DC to shit in my hand on Pennsylvania Ave and throw it at the White House. We’re coming for you, Caligutard! ROLL UP YOUR FUCKING SLEEVE! Capture you! Inject you! I will not apologize! You’re mine for the taking! Cuz you made a career of evil!

11:39 pm • Monday • November 3, 2008

@JNOV: text my cell as medically necessary. I should be in line then as well.

Stillers kickin ass in DC, the bozos on MNF claim this means Hopey wins tomorrow.

12:08 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@FlyingChainSaw: Dreamer.

@drinkyclown: Wear the sailor suit and take pictures. Please.

@JNOV: Good luck. You’ll be fine.

As for me, it’s up in the Am and off to the firehouse to vote. Probably won’t be a line – there never is – but the neighbors will all be there and everyone will be civil. Small town America. Then I will work in the garden. And I will be calm. -ish.

Wonderful reports of Hopey’s last rally in Mannassas (sp?). Crowd of 90,000.

12:12 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

BARACK WINS DIXVILLE NOTCH NH 16-6

/geek

12:23 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@redmanlaw: err, that’s *15* to 6.

/slinks away

Oh, and the ‘Skins got beat at home in the last home game before the election, which history shows means a win for the non-incumbent party. Yay, Steelers.

12:38 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@redmanlaw: did you see the photo of Obama with Jerome Bettis and Franco Harris? Awesome!

12:44 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@Dodgerblue: The black Steelers Obama 08 jersey is way cool.

12:55 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@JNOV: Please go vote. Do you want me to call you at 7 am (which would be 4 am my time) to make sure you’re in line? Nothing will happen to you and JNOV Jr. Don’t wear visible Unicorn paraphernelia, bring your DL and your utility or insurance bill, go there and VOTE! You MUST DO IT! I am so afraid that Pennsylvania will be this year’s Ohio and you must do it.

Cynica eloquently explains why you can’t give into fear. Think of the little kids in the south being attacked by dogs and fire hoses in the 50s and 60s so that you and JNOV Jr. can make the 15th Amendment real.

And if anyone says shit to you, keep your mouth closed, vote, walk out of the polling place, and call Election Protection at 866-OUR-VOTE to report harassment.

Please send me a text message when you and JNOV Jr. leave the polling place.

12:57 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

Springsteen haz hope. His eloquent speech on Sunday in Ohio for the Unicorn. The Rising is on our iHopes election playlist.

It’s great to be here today among friends. I’d like to thank Senator Obama and his folks for inviting me. I’ve been here many times since 1973, but never on a day as glorious as this one. We are at the crossroads.

I’ve spent 35 years writing about America and its people. What does it mean to be an American? What are our duties, our responsibilities, our reasonable expectations when we live in a free society? I saw myself less as a partisan for any particular political party, than as an advocate for a set of ideas. Economic and social justice, America as a positive influence around the world. Truth, transparency and integrity in government. The right of every American to a job, a living wage, to be educated in a decent school, to a life filled with the dignity of work, promise, and the sanctity of home. These are the things that make a life, that build and define a society. These are the things we think of on the deepest level, when we refer to our freedoms. Today those freedoms have been damaged, and curtailed by eight years of a thoughtless, reckless, and morally adrift administration.

I spent most of my life as a musician measuring the distance between the American dream and American reality. For many Americans who are today losing their jobs, their homes, seeing their retirement funds disappear, who have no health care, or who have been abandoned in our inner cities, the distance between that dream and their reality has never been greater or more painful. I believe Senator Obama has taken the measure of that distance in his own life and work. I believe he understands in his heart the cost of that distance in blood and suffering in the lives of everyday Americans. I believe as president he would work to bring that dream back to life, and into the lives of many of our fellow Americans, who have justifiably lost faith in its meaning.

In my job, I travel around the world, and occasionally play in big stadiums, just like Senator Obama. I continue to find everywhere I go that America remains a repository for people’s hopes and desires. That despite the terrible erosion of our standing around the world, for many we remain a house of dreams. One thousand George Bushes and one thousand Dick Cheneys will never be able to tear that house down. That is something only we can do, and we’re not going to let that happen.

This administration will be leaving office, dumping in our laps the national tragedies of Katrina, Iraq, and our financial crisis. Our house of dreams has been abused, looted, and left in a terrible state of disrepair. It needs defending against those who would sell it down the river for power, influence or a quick buck. It needs strong arms, hearts and minds. It needs someone with Senator Obama’s understanding, temperateness, deliberativeness, maturity, pragmatism, toughness and faith. But most of all it needs us. You and me. All a nation has that keeps it from coming apart is the social contract between its’ citizens. Whatever grace God has deemed to impart to us resides in our connections with one another, in honoring the life, the hopes, the dreams, of the man or woman up the street, or across town. That’s where we make our small claim upon heaven. In recent years that contract has been shredded and as we look around today, it is shredding before our eyes. But today we are at the crossroads.

I’m honored to be here on the same stage as Senator Obama. From the beginning, there has been something in Senator Obama that has called upon our better angels, I suspect, because he has had a life where he has so often had to call upon his. We’re going to need all the angels we can get on the hard road ahead. Senator Obama helped us rebuild our house big enough for the dreams of all our citizens. For how well we accomplish this task will tell us what it means to be an American in the new century, what’s at stake, and what it means to live in a free society. So I don’t know about you, but I want my country back, I want my dream back, I want my America back. Now is the time to stand together with Barack Obama and Joe Biden and the millions of Americans that are hungry for a new day, roll up our sleeves and come on up for the rising.

1:13 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@JNOV: Please go vote for the Eagle so I don’t have to read this No Child Left Behind crap anymore . . .

Brought to you by “what’s in it for me . org. ”

And c’mon, don’t you want to see Rev Wright swear in Our Guy as the ultimate fuck you?

Git ‘r done, baby.

1:14 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@rptrcub: Speaking of Georgia – holy shit

1:35 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

And speaking of Omens. The Melbourne Cup (Australia’s premier horse race) has been run and won.

Second prize went to a horse by the name of Bauer. I immediately connected this to the neo-cons pin-up boy “Jack Bauer” of the ‘What if there was a ticking time bomb’ argument for torture ‘enhanced interrogation’.

So the horses have spoken. (I’ll just go outside, turn around three times, and spit, and curse now)

Rupert “Who do I have to sack to get this called for Bush” Murdoch is in Australia at the moment, calling us bludgers and bums and calling our schools 19th Century. So maybe the pundits won’t be looking over their shoulders this time.

Good luck and trouble free voting. I’ll be worrying in my sleep tonight.

2:26 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@Promnight: I won’t be on line because I’ll be watching returns with my favorite gheyz but I will be with you in spirit. I’m sorry you have to work Wednesday a.m.

P.S. @ All: So speaking of collective karma, have we decided whether we’re going to watch MSNBC, Comedy Central, or PBS for return coverage?
Since my hero Dan Rather has been sent out to pasture this election (won’t be the same without him reciting nicknames of states) I vote for Jon Stewart & Stephen Colbert. Second place to Rachel and Keiff Oh.

2:44 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@SanFranLefty: *sobs* I’ll have to catch comedy central on the tubze tomorrow.

And I can’t get either of Colbert’s or Stewart’s Monday shows to load!

3:10 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

Why am I tortured by Ambien ads on teevee when I ran out of pills weeks ago and I am so fucking wired cuz voting starts on the east coast in 3 hours and 50 minutes??

Bartender, another bottle of red wine, por favor.

4:21 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

JNOV,
our sweet jnov. did you forget you’re a philly girl? BAD ASS.
it’s 4 am. i am so nervous too and all i did was send in an absentee ballot.
i love what lefty and mistress cyn said to you, and i’m carrying that motion. also, dodger had an inspired piece of advice: be cesar milan, you know, the dog whisperer? CALM, ASSERTIVE attitude allows him to walk in a pen with vicious dogs and gets respect because of the attitude he wears. i know you can do it. i’m calling you in a couple hours. i will stay on the phone and walk with you through this. you’re in pennsyltucky. you must do this to face your fears, but much more importantly, you are teaching jr. to forge ahead when he’s afraid. he’s taking his cues from you. you must do this for HIM. i know what a caring mother you are, put him first, and your fears will lesson.
i really don’t think you’ll have any problems, but i understand unfounded fears and how real they can be. take your blackberry, take some meds. i’m calling you at 7a.m…..

lefty, bruce’s speech made me cry. won’t be the only time today.
saw, thanks for saying what we think, but don’t have your gift of verbal perversion.

my vote is cast for watching the returns with jon and stephen, and i’ll be alone here too with some take-out, rum, and the red white and blue bong…and my stinquers!

4:31 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

According to the angle of the sun and elevation of the moon, some polls are already open… Is it wrong to Hope(tm) for an East Coast Sweep so I don’t have to wake up on the hour, every hour tonight?

4:33 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

O/T
nojo, did you ever see the ID at the end of all david e. kelley shows?
where the old lady is watching tv and her rocking chair falls over and she says, “you stinkers!” was that your inspiration?

4:34 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@CheapBoy:
i think we’re the only ones awake. good morning!
what’s your time difference? i’ll be in jerusalem for months and the 7 hour time difference freaks me out.

4:55 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@baked: 20:53 hours here. Almost 9pm. (I think we are GMT +10 and +1 for Daylight savings)

I saw the early results from that town in New Hampshire and my heart leapt with joy.

5:40 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

We Stinqueros will ride thru this day together, mi amigos.
@JNOV: The depth of humanity you express in your blog also reveals the deep will/devotion to what is right, so any fear you have can be assuaged by that strength that dwells within you.

@SanFranLefty: Thanks for posting Springsteen’s incredible speech. He is one of my truly favorite performers.

I am up way too early for someone who is planning to attend the local Dem. victory party this evening. I will get some sleep later this week. I guess I am anxious like all you other Stinqueros. I think my concern extends for what happens after the election more than the actual event today.

5:41 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@CheapBoy:
jeebus, you’re in next week!
i never re adjusted to the time difference when i got back from israel. THAT is why i’m awake every day at 3a.m. it’s 10am there!

it’s ok…i don’t want to miss a minute of this day.

5:48 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@baked:
@CheapBoy:

Bonjour, mes amis les stinques!

I’m currently mainlining coffee and scanning the nooz before heading out to the polls. My plan for returns watching is CNN or PBS at 7, surfing over to MSNBC as the evening progresses, then on to Stewart/Colbert at 10ET. After 11 depends on how the evening goes and whether the liquor holds out.

Baked, make sure JNOV calls me if she gets twitchy. I sent her my number.

5:53 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@AARPrick:
good morning prick, and a glorious election day to you!
saw springsteen in concert 3 times. BEST stage performer EVER.

5:56 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@nabisco:
if she answers her phone, i’ll have her in a head lock, but good to know you’re at the ready with re-enforcement. oh, happy day!
fingers crossed everyone!

6:27 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@baked: Good morning beautiful. It is supposed to be beautiful warm fall weather here, I imagine it is gorgeous there. Yeah, I think we are ready to kick ass and take names.

G’day cheapboy and Nabisco.

I will be here sporadically, I am at work and starting my day earlier so I will get away early to vote.

6:33 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@baked: @nabisco: @AARPrick: @CheapBoy: Good morning, good morning, good morning, and good evening. Just about to head out to vote before work. Will take the camera and see if there’s anything worth photographing (outside the polling place, of course).

6:38 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@SanFranLefty: If Unicorn turns this state blue, I may have a heart attack. One that I’ll gladly have.

JNOV, honey, don’t feel bad about being anxious. It’ll be ok, and we may all be pleasantly surprised today! And you’ll be part of this historic night.

All: I will be at an election night party, so I won’t be here for the live blog. But I look forward to checking in later on!

7:03 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

Time to go vote.

Time to dream of neo-cons strapped to gurneys begging for their lives, shouting their last sieg heils.

7:15 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@FlyingChainSaw: Let’s keep that happy train of thought barreling down the straightaway. I would wager that the very mouth breathers out there who supported these dirty bastards would be so totally happy and way into being able to push the button that would take the BushCos out. That irony would be lost on the BushCo denizens as we all know they wipe there asses on those pathetic fucktards who support them.

7:31 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

i started calling jnov at 6. called 3 times, she’s not answering.
i’m worried about her now.

7:32 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

We voted. We were in line for approx. 5 minutes, maybe ten. And we’re done! Huzzah! Nothing left to do but wait…

ADD: And no one bothered us or even looked at us funny. What can I say about irrational fear? It’s irrational.

7:35 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@baked: I was asleep and the phone was off. Sorry Sweetheart.

7:38 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

OMG! You all are the nicest, kindest people. Thanks for encouraging me, and your words have touched me. Thank you so very much.

7:40 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@JNOV:
YAY! mazel tov! i just called you 5 minutes ago. turn on your phone!

8:03 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@JNOV:
still not answering. i’m heading out for an errand or 3, then glue myself back to the returns.
your lucky son, because you’re his mom, got to participate in an historical election. you overcame your fear and gave your son the opportunity to feel he has control of his destiny.
whether that’s really true or not for any of us doesn’t matter TODAY.
TODAY we all get to Hope. and YOU made it possible for jnov jr.
proud of you girlfriend.

8:10 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@baked: Just got out of the shower and am on my way to work. I’m sorry I keep missing you.

I can’t comment from work, and I volunteer tonight, so I’ll see you guys around 9:30.

Love love love!
JNOV

8:24 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

Good morning, all. Did he concede yet? Did I miss it?

8:41 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

It’s raining here in So Cal, but sposta clear up later this morning. My wife and I are going to vote when the polls open, then I have to go to work to file an appellate brief. Election night party at my house tonight — c’mon over.

8:53 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@JNOV: Woo hoo babe – congrats to you and JNOV Jr.!

I just woke up, which means I actually slept. Which I was worried I wouldn’t, so I am rested and happy. And anxious. I live and work in the same neighborhood, so I am going to go vote at a mid-late morning ‘off’ time to hopefully avoid the masses of people voting before they take the train downtown. We’ll see how that goes.

9:03 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@AARPrick: At some level the mouthbreathers know they are regarded as nothing more than cannon fodder and mule feed. If BushCo could make as much money depopulating and garrisoning Texas as it did in Iraq, Austin would be ashes inside of a minute.

Hey, Caligutard, let’s hear some sieg heil now, asshole! Let’s here it loud and clear before we take you and your friends to the gas chamber!

9:44 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

I was in line for only about 20 minutes before I got to place my first vote in a general election at an actual polling station inside the US in 20 years….pictures at 11 (mell, are you not supposed to snap photos inside the polling station, cuz well um I did….)

Please to report that JNOV and I were textapathically linked throughout, she and Jr. actually got their votes in before I did. Lines not too bad, I scored a “Teamsters for Barry” sticker which I’ll post later this evening.

ánimo Stinqueros!

10:59 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@nabisco: What’s the punchline to that joke Kerry tried to tell about McCain? Oh yeah, “it depends.”

11:03 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@JNOV: Yay!! I’m so proud of you. So are Rosa Parks and MLK. And, most importantly, your son.

11:06 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

I love you all! I’m so glad to be part of this wonderful community.

My husband and I did early voting here in Bloomington yesterday morning. It was the third time since early October that we had checked out the early voting line (very long every time) and the last morning to do early voting (which I was determined to do because otherwise we vote on machines with no paper trail. If we do early voting with me assisting my husband to vote, then I mark papers that get read by an optical scanner.). Early voting opened at 8:30 am. Bus schedule meant we couldn’t get there before about twenty of nine, by which time the line was already almost as long as when we gave up on it on Sunday afternoon. So we waited and waited and waited. Finally emerged with our I Voted stickers at ten minutes to noon. McCain was ahead of O in Indiana by about 2 % when I went to bed Sunday night. Oh, how glorious it will be if O carries this horribly red state!

11:18 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@lynnlightfoot: You are a true American hero. Thank you.

11:57 am • Tuesday • November 4, 2008

@mellbell: Thanks! Seems that it is perfectly okay to take a picture of my ballot for posting later, what the privacy requirement covers however is documenting how anybody else is voting or may have voted.

Pa Dept of State is looking into allegations that Repub pollwatchers were thrown out of Philly stations, apparently something that happened in 04 as well.

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