Frantic Search Begins for Remaining Laws to Subvert
Facing a Constitutionally imposed deadline of January 20 to declare martial law or get out of Dodge, the Bush Administration has launched a government-wide mandate to undermine any laws it has not yet ignored.
“This one’s tough,” said a harried DoJ lawyer, speaking on background. “There’s not much left.”
Insiders were shocked that the Endangered Species Act had lasted this long, and blamed Interior Secretary Dirk Kempthorne for not dispatching it sooner. Kempthorne finally got around to knocking off bald eagles and polar bears Monday night, allowing federal agencies to skip scientific review and decide for themselves whether running an Interstate through Yosemite was likely to cause problems for non-voting rodents.
“Look, we’re busy figuring out how to stripmine Yellowstone,” said Kempthorne. “Cut us some slack.”
The new Suck or Die Initiative aims to secure George W. Bush’s place in history as not merely the worst but the most destructive U.S. president, amid concerns that a McCain Administration may challenge his standing. The initiative follows recent revelations that Bush included a signing statement with his oath of office.
¡ANDREW! • Other Useful Exposure Notifications @nojo: Apparently they have cliff divers to entertain patrons while they enjoy their meals. Mr. A!…
NOJO • Other Useful Exposure Notifications @¡Andrew!: So that’s not the waterpark? Been here eight years, still get my landmarks confused.
¡ANDREW! • Other Useful Exposure Notifications I saw that Casa Bonita is reopening in Denver OMGOMGOMG!! Y'all are so lucky--it'll be mass…
¡ANDREW! • Other Useful Exposure Notifications America Is An Out-Of-Touch Gerontocracy, And I’m Glad I Don’t Live There "These has-been…
¡ANDREW! • Other Useful Exposure Notifications Can we get a proof of life from Merrique "let them eat endless investigations" Garlandtoinette?…
MANCHUCANDIDATE • Bye! And the drips keep on coming. With each lame denial comes another revelation about Justice Ruckus.
MANCHUCANDIDATE • Bye! @¡Andrew!: Before we found about why Thomas goes as the Crow flies (in a private jet.)
¡ANDREW! • Bye! Survey Finds Nearly 6 In 10 Wealthy Americans Living Fraud To Fraud WASHINGTON—Noting that the…
NOJO • Bye! @¡Andrew!: From what I’m seeing in bits and pieces, yeah, Licht. CNN under Zucker was bad…
¡ANDREW! • Bye! @nojo: When life gives you Lemons (shrug). Not particularly sad, since: 1. Who still watches…