Now that io9 has spilled the brains on our open-source Zombie Bible, let’s have a look at everyone else we’re beating to market:

• The Portrait of a Lady and Vampires (Henry James and Laurell K. Hamilton)
• Crime and Punishment and Werewolves (Feodor Dostoevsky and Stephen King)
• War and Peace and Alien and Predator (Leo Tolstoy and Jeff VanderMeer)

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In this first installment of the Illustrated Zombie Bible Classics series, Moses handles two zombies with his staff and his .45 while parting the waters of the Red Sea.

The Bible may be the foundation document of Western Civilization, but it hasn’t been revised in almost two millennia.

Frankly, we’re astonished that anyone can still make sense of it.

Even the majesty and poetry of the King James version sounds archaic to modern ears. Modern translations, on the other hand, just sound lame.

What’s missing? Zombies.

Sure, you can argue that our omniscient Creator saw that one coming — for what is the Resurrection but a Zombie story? What is Revelation but the greatest Zombie movie ever made? How can we even think of the End Times without Zombies?

Well, we can’t. And that’s why we’ve created the Stinque Zombie Bible.

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