https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jCljFYn3zTY

The George Carlin we grew up with — and deeply internalized — was not the Carlin of comedy albums and HBO specials, but the Carlin of Tonight Show appearances, a forum in which he had to work clean. Our Carlin was the Carlin of language, whose take on “jumbo shrimp” and “military intelligence” proved you could never take people at their word — or if you did, you’d best pay close attention.

The other Carlins we certainly admired once we discovered them, but they’re not the Carlin of our youth, the Carlin who to this day informs everything we say and write, the Carlin who taught us the delights of language itself. That Carlin we despaired of honoring online, until Harry Shearer found a clip that sums it up for us.

“McCain, a veteran political leader with a military background, has demonstrated that he’s not conceding the youth vote to Obama. He has reached out to young voters in the ways they reach each other, through YouTube.com and with profiles on the social networking Web sites MySpace and Facebook.”

Don’t know about you, but someone should tip off Chris Hansen about that dude on the left.

McCain back in Ohio courting youth vote [Cleveland.com]

John McCain • Barack Obama [MySpace]

“Dig,” Ralphie was telling his homies at the barbershop, “he’s not gangsta enough, you know what I’m saying? Nigga’s only half Bro, but he’s all Oreo. Ignores his peeps so he can do a Tiger on the white folks, all polite and shit. Yes sir, thank you sir, your daughter is very beautiful sir although I wouldn’t dream of pleasuring her with my enormous mandingo that puts your shriveled stem to shame, no sir.”

“True dat,” said the homies.

“Dude’s no Jesse,” said Ralphie. “If I was him, I’d drop the Stepin Fetchit jive and take it to the hood. Stop letting those crackers tell him his business.”

“Word,” said the homies. “You da man.”

Nader: Obama trying to ‘talk white’ [Rocky Mountain News]

Other omens from 1992:

• Cookies
• 90210
• Heather Locklear
• Firefox
• Global Warming
• Quagmire Preparedness
• Hannah Montana
• Spelling Bees
• Gilded Age of Greed, Selfishness, Irresponsibility, Excess, and Neglect
• President Bush

Consumer Confidence Declines to a 16-Year Low [NYT]

Americans who pray and receive answer to prayer
at least once a month: 31%

• That girl in college who didn’t understand that I would have been the best thing that ever happened to her.
• Schwinn Orange Krate.
• 5 down, 12 letters, November 17, 1979.
• Kamchatka.
• Chuck Barris calling me to discuss my brilliant idea for a new game show.
• Hitting a high C with braces.
• Sideburns.
• Pulling an essay on “The Red Wheelbarrow” out of my ass.
• Floating to ceiling by laughing.
• 1980, 1984, 1988, 2000, 2004.

U.S. Religious Landscape Survey [Pew]

Don’t lie, America. We know what makes you happy.

Obama Moves To Reintroduce Himself to Voters [WaPo]

Taking her place in American history alongside Ross Perot and Steve Forbes, Hillary Clinton has failed in her bid to buy the Presidency.

The populist heartthrob is writing off her personal $11 million campaign loan, while elitist tool Barack Obama is rejecting public funding to collect $265 million in special-interest money in small, unmarked bills from 3 million fatcats. “That’s change you can believe in, honey,” he told a private gathering of islamofascist terrorists in Afghanistan.

Obama’s success in gaming campaign-funding reforms by working within the system drew a stern rebuke from John McCain, whose 2000 fundraising pledge is one of the few he hasn’t broken. “I’ve already promised to disown 527 support,” said the presumptive Republican nominee while jowling off Joe Lieberman. “Now I’ll have to disown it twice as much.”

Hillary Clinton struggles with debt [NYDN]

In a shift, Obama rejects public funding [Boston Globe]