Multimillionaire Fails to Buy Election

Taking her place in American history alongside Ross Perot and Steve Forbes, Hillary Clinton has failed in her bid to buy the Presidency.

The populist heartthrob is writing off her personal $11 million campaign loan, while elitist tool Barack Obama is rejecting public funding to collect $265 million in special-interest money in small, unmarked bills from 3 million fatcats. “That’s change you can believe in, honey,” he told a private gathering of islamofascist terrorists in Afghanistan.

Obama’s success in gaming campaign-funding reforms by working within the system drew a stern rebuke from John McCain, whose 2000 fundraising pledge is one of the few he hasn’t broken. “I’ve already promised to disown 527 support,” said the presumptive Republican nominee while jowling off Joe Lieberman. “Now I’ll have to disown it twice as much.”

Hillary Clinton struggles with debt [NYDN]

In a shift, Obama rejects public funding [Boston Globe]

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