We’re Dancing As Fast As We Can
Our guest columnist is in deep shit.
The National Rifle Association of America is made up of four million moms and dads, sons and daughters – and we were shocked, saddened and heartbroken by the news of the horrific and senseless murders in Newtown.
Out of respect for the families, and as a matter of common decency, we have given time for mourning, prayer and a full investigation of the facts before commenting.
The NRA is prepared to offer meaningful contributions to help make sure this never happens again.
The NRA is planning to hold a major news conference in the Washington, DC area on Friday, December 21.
NRA Statement on Newtown School Shootings [WSJ]
Now dance! <kapow!>
“The NRA is planning to hold a major news conference in the Washington, DC area on Friday, December 21.”
Holy shit, maybe the Mayans were right after all.
@IanJ: I looked real hard for something like that, but “western movie shooter tap dance” just doesn’t work in Google Images.
Does waiting for a full investigation of the facts mean they’re hoping a medical examiner will rule all the victims died from athlete’s foot or maybe from halitosis instead of from bullets ripping through their bodies?
@nojo: I can see how that would be a difficult image to find. I think tapdancing is a fine substitute, though.
@SanFranLefty: Yeah, they’re gonna hold a major press conference saying they’re doubling down on the crazy. Don’t hold your breath expecting them to bow to something as inconvenient as reality.
@SanFranLefty: ok, you win the Internet. What will you do with your new real estate?
They will announce that they are forming a committee to study whether crazy people should have access to assault rifles.
They may be willing to compromise on 50 round clips and rocket propelled grenades. Stinger missles are still off the table–you gotta have something in case the black helicopters show up.
BURR DEMING • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 Thank you for this, nojo. He was a wonderful talent and, by all accounts, a wonderful human…
NOJO • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 Oh, and there’s a Catholic church across the street. Maybe I can do a little dance for them!
NOJO • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 Now that I’m in NYC, plenty of pigeons to poison in his honor.
NOJO • All the Vice President's Men 2025 update: Nothing happened. And here we are!
MANCHUCANDIDATE • Weeping Angel Imagine going from hope to Fascism in less than two decades enabled by greedy ass (millionaire)…
NOJO • Nightmare at the Museum From the last time he threatened to bomb Iran, 2020. Remember that one? All a misty blur now.
NOJO • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! @ManchuCandidate: I have birthright citizenship in Cascadia, so I think I’m good.
MANCHUCANDIDATE • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! @nojo: Only the sane parts... like the West coast, New England (minus the Bruins and…
NOJO • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! @ManchuCandidate: So, can you guys annex us now?
MANCHUCANDIDATE • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! PP is done. 51st state, my ass.