O, Sweet Mystery of Electoral Politics, At Last I’ve Found You!
Our guest columnist is totally not running for President.
GQ: How old do you think the Earth is?
Marco Rubio: I’m not a scientist, man. I can tell you what recorded history says, I can tell you what the Bible says, but I think that’s a dispute amongst theologians and I think it has nothing to do with the gross domestic product or economic growth of the United States. I think the age of the universe has zero to do with how our economy is going to grow. I’m not a scientist. I don’t think I’m qualified to answer a question like that. At the end of the day, I think there are multiple theories out there on how the universe was created and I think this is a country where people should have the opportunity to teach them all. I think parents should be able to teach their kids what their faith says, what science says. Whether the Earth was created in 7 days, or 7 actual eras, I’m not sure we’ll ever be able to answer that. It’s one of the great mysteries.
All Eyez on Him [GQ, via TPM]
Senator Rube serves on the Committee on Commerce, Science, and Transportation where he is a member of the Subcommittee on Communications, Technology, and the Internet, the Subcommittee on Oceans, Atmosphere, Fisheries, and Coast Guard, and the Subcommittee on Science and Space. Bill Nye the Science Guy wept.
“It’s one of the great mysteries.”
Like why anyone would ever vote for this idiot.
@gunnergoz: Forget it, Jake. It’s Florida.
Any survivors?
@nojo: Yup. There are some words of appreciation from me on your new post.
@nojo: I’m still mostly in lurk mode, but I’m still here. Congrats to the Tree for its triumph over the Ducks.
@Walking Still: It’s going to get crazy this weekend with the Tree v. the Bruins. Dodger has already challenged me to a bet (not a $10K Rmoney bet), loser makes a donation to the Red Cross Sandy relief. If Stanford wins, then by my calculations they’ll play Uklah again for the Pac-8/10/12 championship.
@nojo: Civilization itself has collapsed here in Seattle now that we have all the legal MJ and spine-shattering gay seXXX of which we ever dared to dream. It’s hedonistic anarchy!
And grad school srsly has eaten my life–but I’ll be finished with Fall Quarter in just two and a half weeks.
@¡Andrew!: Looking back, I see my time in Grad School as some of the best in my life. Remember in all the hustle and hard work to enjoy yourself.
@Tommmcatt: My big regret is that I’ve had to work full-time while also going to grad school full-time, so I’ve missed out on most of the fun parts. I did go on study abroad programs to Italy, Japan, Korea, Mexico, and Spain, which were totally awesome.
@Tommmcatt May Just Have Some MJ In His System As Well, So What?: Looking back on grad school, I remember my first-year stress appendectomy. And then paying for it.
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! Sen. sENEMA has a career ahead of her in giving designer psychedelic enemas to trust-fund…
MANCHUCANDIDATE • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @¡Andrew!: She thought three's company. Nope.
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! Gawd hates SIN, specifically Kyrsten SINema.
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! So long, Senatard Glitter-trash. I hope she knows how much everyone H8s her :0)
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! The racist kleptocratic MSM is really gonna have to crank up the bread and circuses now that their…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @¡Andrew!: Ted Kazinski Sec of Interior Only the DEAD are extreme enough to serve in DONNIE…
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @FlyingChainSaw: Department of Health & Human Services: Charles Manson Defense Secretary:…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @¡Andrew!: Right, the administration's all star line up: Pres: Trump VP: Ted Kaczynski…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @FlyingChainSaw: Actually, FDLE would be the first to admit it. The state banks on it with 'sue me…
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! I cannot wait for the Republinazi MAGAt trash to DEMAND that $hitler be allowed to be president…