Hell is Where the Heart Is

Our guest columnist is a third-rate Internet preacher who can’t afford a second-rate cable show, but he amuses us nonetheless.

Bill Keller, the world’s leading Internet Evangelist and the founder of LivePrayer.com, with over 2.4 million subscribers worldwide reading the daily devotional he has written every morning for 13 years on the issues of the day from a Biblical worldview, states that a vote for Mormon cult member Mitt Romney will insure at least 1 million souls will end up in hell!!!

Keller was in the national news in 2007 for his now infamous quote, “a vote for Romney is a vote for Satan,” has shared that Romney’s Mormon cult is gearing up for the election of the first Mormon President in November. They are already gearing up their “evangelism” efforts to bring new converts to their cult’s false teachings. Keller claims, “The Bible clearly teaches Mormon doctrine is 100% inconsistent with Biblical Christianity and those who buy into what Paul calls ‘another Gospel,’ will die and their soul be lost for all eternity.”

Keller, who has never told anyone who to or not to vote for and never endorses any political candidate said, “Christians have a real dilemma this November. It is like Satan flipping a two-headed coin with his head on both sides. How can anyone who claims to be a follower of Christ vote for our current President who in every word and deed has proven to be a true enemy of God on every major spiritual issue of the day. He has been a staunch advocate for the legalized slaughter of babies, promoted the radical homosexual agenda, and been a friend to the enemies of Israel.”

Keller went on, “The Republican choice will be a member of the satanic Mormon cult who will never have to say a word for his cult to take advantage of their ultimate goal since they were founded 200 years ago, and that is to gain mainstream acceptance, giving them all the ammunition they need to aggressively seek converts to their cults beliefs. Conservative estimates are that they will gain at least 1 million new converts, meaning a Romney election will help insure at least 1 million souls will burn in hell for all eternity! Any ‘Christian leader’ who supports Romney obviously cares more about politics than souls!!!”

Keller concluded, “For Christians to vote with a clear conscience, they will have to pray hard about ALL candidates for President, meaning looking at the third party candidates as well. In the end, as I shared last November a Romney/Obama match-up means that God has finally taken His hand of protection and blessing off of this nation for our gross sins and wickedness. The reality is, NO politician has the true answers this nation needs, since our true problems are spiritual and not political, and the only hope for the United States is to repent of our sins and turn back to God and Biblical Truth.”

A Vote for Romney will Lead 1 Million Plus Souls to Hell [Christian Newswire, via Right Wing Watch]

Live Prayer [Wikipedia]

7 Comments

Hell is fundamentalist loons who can’t think out of the Bible.

Although I have to admit that the brewing theological bun fight among the GOPer ranks will be amusing to watch.

@ManchuCandidate: We can only hope the fundies flinging poo cripples Mittens.

@blogenfreude:
The more likely scenario is that Mittens cripples Mittens thanks to his oblivious comments.

[this] means that God has finally taken His hand of protection and blessing off of this nation for our gross sins and wickedness

Anybody else notice that the prevalence of this sort of thinking has been directly related to the *rise* of the modern evangelical movement, complete with its profit-driven televangelism, hard-right corporatism and the “Prosperity Gospel”? Are they sure the “sins and wickedness” aren’t the proverbial log in their own eye?

@ManchuCandidate: I was going to say.

our true problems are spiritual and not political

And here I always thought those rumbly sounds were my tummy telling me something. I would never have guessed it was the Voice of God. Do you think I can take my tummy on TV and make a million dollars?

This man is a genius, and should be on every news and pundit show that exists, just like that hateful racist woman from New Jersey who called Obama an “inadequate black male” was back in 2008. Surely our fairness-obsessed media will apply the same principle this time. They are, after all, persons of equal influence and intelligence.

Won’t it be funny to hear them screaming about having to choose between a Mormon and a Muslim? Noooooo….!

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