The Daddy Wars Are a Lot More Fun Than the Mommy Wars

In this corner, Montana Democratic Governor Brian Schweitzer:

[It’s] kinda ironic given that [Romney’s] family came from a polygamy commune in Mexico, but then he’d have to talk about his family coming from a polygamy commune in Mexico, given the gender discrepancy… [Women are] not great fans of polygamy, 86 percent were not great fans of polygamy. I am not alleging by any stretch that Romney is a polygamist and approves of [the] polygamy lifestyle, but his father was born into [a] polygamy commune in Mexico.

And in this corner, the Washington Post:

The line of polygamists in Obama’s family can be traced back generations in western Kenya, where it was an accepted practice within the Luo (pronounced LOO-oh) tribe. His great-grandfather, Obama Opiyo, had five wives, including two who were sisters. His grandfather, Hussein Onyango, had at least four wives, one of whom, Akumu, gave birth to the president’s father, Barack Obama, before fleeing her abusive husband. Obama Sr. was already married when he left Kenya to study at the University of Hawaii, where he married again. His American wife-to-be, Stanley Ann Dunham, was not yet 18 and unaware of his marital situation when she became pregnant with his namesake son in 1961.

Can we drop everything else and just talk about this from now until November? Because that would be fucking awesome.

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When a man loves multiple women
Can’t keep his mind on nothing else
He’ll haunt the world
When his love life is major news
If his kid runs for preznit
The media will play it wrong
Turn his back on his family
If it becomes front page news

My father in law came by yesterday. As long as I’ve known him (40+ years) he has been an evangelical’s evangelical Xtian in all the worst ways. He didn’t want my wife to go out with me back in high school because I was a – horrors – Catholic. He believes that God has made it is his personal responsibility to get everybody “saved” from their erroneous beliefs. What they may want doesn’t matter.

Anyway, he asked me to email the Gingrich campaign and beg Newt to confront the ex-gov on TV and ask the Mittster if he believes Jesus is his savior. He figures at that moment of truth God would utterly crush the Romney presidential bid, since Newt is one of God’s chosen.

I told him I’d be happy to help, but then I may have burst his bubble by mentioning the $500 check Newt’s campaign bounced recently, which doesn’t look good for his chances this year.

The funniest part of the bizarre conversation was he couldn’t even say Mitt’s name. Instead he consistently called him “The Mormon”. The latest Harold poll says Mitt is in deeper shit with conservative Christians than he realizes.

@Dave H: Does that make you The Papist?

As far as Mitt’s Cultish Fantasies go, that certainly dampens the enthusiasm among fundies, but we still have a Commie Kenyan Usurper in office, and a vote for Mitt is a vote against that man. I’m not yet sure how that plays out.

On the other hand, AP put out an electoral-vote poll the other day, and Barry’s enjoying a solid lead right now. (The daily popularity polls don’t count for anything.) I’m still waiting for my favorite Non-Nate Site to start posting those numbers, including trends. Saved me a lot of fretting in 2008.

Why is there such fascination with the way people arrange their lives? Polygamy – I could care less.

@blogenfreude: I care when they rip,off the government and rape little girls, but otherwise not a real,issue for me.

@Tommmcatt Wears A Hoodie Daily: Agreed – child rape bad, multiple wives or husbands A-OK.

I became disenchanted about polygamy when I found out each wife has her own bedroom. I thought they just got a bigger bed when a new wife joined the family and every night the husband would dive into a writhing pile of naked women in an immense bed. Only Mormons could make something with such potential so boring.

@FlyingChainSaw: I have enough trouble maintaining one relationship. The thought of trying to maintain multiples at once sounds like a kind of hell on earth, if only for the mental trauma I’d inflict on myself trying to keep multiple women happy.

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