Women Beg Herman Cain! Not to Pull Out

Robin Haraway, Millington, TN:

“Sir, I firmly believe that you were sent to our nation through Divine Providence and I believe that you are the man to preserve our Republic for our children. Remember, you have overcome many adversities in your life. You have pulled yourself up by your bootstraps through sheer determination and honesty. You were delivered from cancer. My prayers are for strength and guidance for you and your beautiful family this weekend.”

Debbie Stevens-Paulsen, Tulsa, OK:

“We figure that you’re probably a very busy man who comes in contact w/ tons of people daily, and that you probably both have friends the other isn’t friends with, and that you have helped other people, men and women, without discussing it, because that’s just what you do, you’re a softie (stop that now!) and got taken advantage of. That happens.”

Julie Davis, Mo, MO:

“I first saw Mr Cain on the day he announced his presidency! I absolutely loved his upbeat attitude about my country! Then he smiled … how long has it been since we have seen a sincere smile from a political candidate!”

Stefani Smirnes, Dunwoody, GA:

“Mr. Cain, To me you are the embodiment of the prayers of every faithful believing slave who turned to ALMIGHTY GOD for deliverance from slavery and inequality. You are the embodiment of Martin Luther King Jr. ‘I have a dream’ speech. You are the only hope I have for a future in America!Be strong and of good courage Mr. Cain, Our God Reigns! ”

Adrienne (Caos) Sinclair, California, CA:

“Dear Mr Cain many years ago I find this not so unique for christians I knew a man Charles in died at 54 i knew him and and his wife and they were beautiful from the heart christians. at one point in my live i was going to lose my home and well he heard about it, so me at Maass and told me Adrinne I want you to go down to the bank Monday and there wil be a check for 40.000 dollars.”

Women for Herman Cain [Cain 2012]

cain’t is gonna be awful busy flying all over the country thanking his new harem. he better harden up that softie.

Meanwhile, here are the stock-photo Cain ladies!

TPM tracks down the photographer to Germany. So the presumption is that these are European ladies.

Maybe he’s just big in Germany… like Hasselhoff.

These ladies make the Conservatives4Palin look less dumb.

A smile? A fucking smile? It’s for preznit of the US America not an audition for Willie Loman in the local theater company’s version of Death of A Salesman.

Or it’s just a joke. Please let it be a joke.

We’ll be better off as a country when we stop acting like it’s the high school Student Council elections all over again. And by “we,” I mean the so-called Idiot Independent voter.

Cain! planning “major announcement” in Georgia tomorrow — after he’s discussed things in person with The Missus. No point even trying to guess which way that wind blows.

Saturday programming alert: Huckabee’s hosting a Fox “candidate forum” at 8pm ET, with (at least) Mittens, Crazy Eyes, Newt, Frothy Mix, Ron Paul, and Deranger Rick.

“Candidates will be individually questioned. At no point will candidates have on-air interaction with each other.”

Not sure yet whether I’ll bother with it.

T/J: any of y’all done shots of baijiu at a banquet? I’m still alive, I make no other claims.


Watch it, if only to pity Mitt Romney when Rick Perry addresses him directly and Romney directs a plaintive plea to Huckabee, because Perry’s breaking the rules.

@Serolf Divad: Supposedly the candidates are being individually sequestered offstage — no joint appearances during questioning.

But: It would be awesome if Deranger Rick rushed onstage to challenge Mittens to a duel.

@ManchuCandidate: That would be like finding a way to be colder than absolute zero….

@Benedick: Not that I recall. I stopped when I realized that I was speaking Spanish to the Chinese waitresses.

@Dodgerblue: Excellent! Bravo, my bro! I’m only troubled by the use of ‘stopped’ as a verb. I’m not sure that is the Stinquey way to go. Personally, when it gets to les shots, one is more inclined to find a floor to lie on where one will not be disturbed, Chinese waitresses or, as we say, waitpersons, or no.

The Internets are even faster than you think…

Men for Herman Cain:

“Men For Cain” is a national online high-five of men dedicated to giving props to the ultimate ladies’ man Herman Cain, our next President of the United States. Mr. Cain, beyond any other candidate with exception of maybe Newt, has done more to get into women’s pants throughout his lifetime, defending and promoting the negative issues associated with quality PDA, T&A and serious office groping. Forget the 9-9-9 plan, let’s talk about the 6-9 plan.

How did we survive before the Web?

@Dodger: If it’s any consolation your Bruins put 17 points up against the Dux in the first half of the game. Sadly U of O scored 35. At least your guys scored.

P.S. I still think this Pac-12 North v South is stupid. The two best teams — Tree and Dux — should be playing for the championship.

@nojo: The stock photo is down…oh no is he announcing he is pulling out tomorrow and the campaign wants to avoid paying for it? …or web design rip off?

@texrednface: I grabbed a screenshot earlier of Herman’s Empty Nest, but got distracted.

I’m guessing they paid for it — online stock photos are dirt cheap — but maybe they chose the wrong license or something. (I don’t use many stock photos for clients, but it comes up on occasion.) Hard to say, but it’s certainly unusual.

As to Herman’s announcement tomorrow, I’m not betting either way, never mind the quality of David Gregory’s sources. Conventional wisdom would say he’s quitting, but there’s nothing conventional or wise about Herman Cain!

@nojo: Perhaps they realized the photo of sweater puppies and gestures that indicate a predilection for anal massage was counter productive. Maybe Glo?

@texrednface: Second-guessing the suggestiveness of the image makes more sense to me. All those thumbs.

@SanFranLefty: Now, there’s a backhanded compliment. “Yeah, it was fast, but I’ve had worse.”

@matador1015: I switched my registration from Democrat to unaffiliated last year, so hopefully that has brought the IQ of the idiot independent pool up a couple points.

@karen marie has her eyes tight shut: At least you know the issues. I swear there’s this whole bloc of people who voted for the good-looking black man in 2008, then turned around and voted to throw the tax-and-spend guys out in 2010. The kind that would vote for Mittens because he’s whiter cuter and has a great smile.

@matador1015: I’ve been a registered indie for half my life. But not because I’m a centrist…

@nojo: A HA! Second guessing pays off. Lady German anus masseuses have been replaced with proper picture of Cain! groping his own teen-tiny wife.
Could this signal he is staying in, or attempting to rehabilitate his image before begging for a number two spot? I have to go to a memorial today and may miss all the fun.

@karen marie has her eyes tight shut: @nojo: Similarly I for 30 years, less that ’08 blip to keep the Cankles at bay.

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