Headlines From Every Single Day for the Past Two Years


I don’t know. Cain and his awesomely fabulous 9-9-9 plan is going to take a lot of beating. Even for a plucky mavericky gal like our own beloved Sarah.

BTW. The last Republican preznint (Bunnypants) was famously unable to pronounce ‘nuclear’. The new crop seem to all have the same problem with ‘social security’ which they either pronounce ‘soasal scoorty’ or ‘communism’.


She’s worse than Hamlet.

To be, or not to be, that is the question:
Whether ’tis nobler in the “mind” to be grifting
The bucks and checks of idiots with fortunes,
Or to take “surveyor marks” against a sea of Libruls,
And by running end them? To shoot, to fuck,
No more; and by a quit to say we end
The head-aches, and the thousand jokes about me

@ManchuCandidate: To run, to steal no more,
And by a run, to say we end,
The millions that we get in speaking fees,
To run, perchance to win – ay, there’s the rub:
For in that POTUS win what work may come,
When we have shuffled off this this easy cash,
Must give us pause – there’s the work
That makes calamity of a grifter’s life.
For who would bear the actual demands of time,
The alarm clock’s wrong, pundit’s contumely,
The pangs of missed shoe sales, the law’s constraints,
The boredom plain of office, and the need
To pay attention all the time,
When I myself might might a get mil or so,
From Playboy with a bare bosom?

…Thus avarice makes a waffler of us all;
And thus the native hue of resolution
Is sicklied o’er with the pale cast of greed, you betcha,
And lazy pretend-politicians now in vogue,
With this regard their currents turn awry,
And lose the name of action.

Bravo, gentlemen. Who would fardels bear, indeed.

@Benedick: I always wanted to run a Shakespeare Festival so I could use this idea: Sell a stuffed plush animal themed to the festival in the gift shop.

Fardels Bear, get it?

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