Republicans Waste No Time Driving Congress Off the Rails

So, now that we’re set to embark upon The Most Constitutional Congress in Six Thousand Years of World History, what’s the first thing that happens?

House Rules Chairman David Dreier (R-Calif.) abruptly adjourned a hearing on a GOP health care repeal bill Thursday after he became aware that Rep. Pete Sessions was not sworn in as a Member of the 112th Congress, committee spokeswoman Jo Maney said.

No, the Chief Justice wasn’t at the scene of the crime — Pete wasn’t in the room when everybody sweared fealty to teabaggers yesterday.

But wait, it gets better: Civilian Pete “offered the motion to constitute the Rules Committee,” which was duly passed, and is now duly canceled. And with no Rules Committee, there’s no Obamacare Repeal bill. Oh, there aren’t any House rules, either.

Easy fix, right? Well, depends:

Dreier is consulting with the parliamentarian about how to best craft a unanimous consent agreement to rectify the situation, Maney said…

It’s unclear whether Democrats will allow a unanimous consent agreement to go forward, or if they will force the chamber to restart the entire process of opening the new Congress. That would result in a delay of the health care repeal vote for several days.

Demrats? This is the fattest pitch you’ll be thrown in the next two years. But somehow, we suspect you’ll whiff it.

Sessions’ Blunder Puts Brakes on House Work [Roll Call, via Weigel]

The first feces thrown in the crying orange Oompah Loompah’s rein of error was flung into the teeth of hurricane force stupid.

Good one, GOPers. Scoring on your own net.

WTF was Sessions doing that was so god damn important instead of getting sworn in?

@SanFranLefty: Partaying in the Lobby, apparently. He recited the oath off the Floor, but it doesn’t count.

Bwa, ha, ha, ha, ha!

The Dems should negotiate: they’ll go for unanimous consent as long as the GOP agrees to allow amendments to the repeal bill. That kicks the “dick move” ball back into the GOP’s court. If the GOP refuses, then they only have themselves to blame for the “several day” delay.

@nojo: I’d play this for maximum embarrassment of the Repubs, but that’s just me.

@Dodgerblue: I think Serolf has the right idea. The Rats shouldn’t throw away this opportunity to hold the Pugs to their word.

@nojo: Yeah, but I wouldn’t start there. The Repubs need to believe that the Dems would gladly toast their nuts on a bonfire on the Capitol Mall, before we talk deals.

@Dodgerblue: Hahahahahahaha … hahahahahahahahahaha … hahahahahahahahahahaha …

On what planet would that happen? Surely not this one.

I heard on NPR earlier this evening that Obama’s appointment of Daley as CoS “demonstrates his seriousness in moving to the center.”

Can I borrow a gun? I would like to shoot myself now.

@SanFranLefty: HuffPo has a better description:

The Republicans, incumbent Pete Sessions of Texas and freshman Mike Fitzpatrick, missed the swearing in because they were at a fundraiser in the Capitol Visitors Center. The pair watched the swearing-in on television from the Capitol Visitors Center with their hands raised.

HuffPo also fires off the best line:

There is no provision in the Constitution for a remote swearing-in by television.

@nojo: That’s all fine and good, but how will we do it when we have the Martian Colony established (you know, in 200 years)? How will they do the swearing-in then? I suppose the Constitution doesn’t have a provision for swearing-in by sub-ether radio, either.

@karen marie has her eyes tight shut: Sometimes it’s hard to believe that Obama (a) is a lawyer and (b) has Jews working for him. It’s meshuggeneh to start a negotiation with your bottom line.

@nojo: Not even sworn in yet and already at a reelection fundraiser. Class.Ick.

And the fucking Dems are too clueless to run with this…..or handle it correctly. I’m sure it will somehow all become the Kenyan Mooslem usurper’s fault that they weren’t there. Or they were kidnapped by gheyz and taken to the fundraiser…

@SanFranLefty: Some folks are making a fuss about holding the fundraiser, saying it violates rules. But if they weren’t Official Critters, and there are no Official Rules yet, I don’t see a problem.

In all fairness, maybe they didn’t get the memo, what with their lips glued to Jamie Dimon’s kahk. Congressing is hard, ya’ll!

The It Gets Better project has a kick-ass new new anthem. Very Peaches meets Lady GaGa (NSFW)

Yeah. Whatever. The state of the world has me drunk, hopped up on real cold meds and watching documentaries about Ram Dass and Ernest Becker. Last week was Casino Jack type stuff. This week is all about escapism and finding a new place to live. Ram Dass’s dad is teh awesome.

@Tommmcatt is with Karin Marie on This One: formerly known as Rich Alpert, Harvard prof and buddy of Timothy Leary during the golden days of LSD.

Ram Dass’s dad was some kinda mega millionaire Bostonian who owned a bunch of rialroads, and they had a 3-hole golf course on their NH property. When Ram came back from India, 400 hippies moved onto the golf course, and the dad was like, “Meh. He’s always done whatever he wants to do so, yeah. I have 400 hippies on my golf course in a drum circle. Meh..” I’m waiting for the part where Ram Dass and Leary have their falling out.

@Dodgerblue: Yeah. Till they got kicked out and shit. Heh.

@Dodgerblue: From wiki:

His father, George Alpert, was a lawyer in the Boston area and president of the New York, New Haven and Hartford Railroad, as well as one of the leading founders of Brandeis University and the Albert Einstein College of Medicine.

@Dodgerblue: formerly known as Rich Alpert

Preempts the question, “Who is Ram Dass’s dad giving him that sort of name?”

These kids (now multiplied to four) are not playing Monopoly correctly. See how video games corrupt the mind? I tell them they’re doing it all wrong, and they give me the side eye.

@mellbell: Haha! Naw. The Maha Raji Maharaj-ji gave Alpert that name. Means “Servant of God” or some shit like that. There are nekkid pictures of hippies bathing in the water hazards, though.

Judy on my iTunes, giving “The Man That Got Away” in teh classic style.

@Tommmcatt is with Karin Marie on This One: She makes me sad. Maybe it’s because her mom was treated so badly.

@JNOV: Never having heard of him, I read it (wrongly, I should think) as “rammed ass.” To quote The Stranger, “that’s a name no one would self-apply where I come from.”

The best part of this movie so far has been the few seconds they devoted to Wavy Gravy.

@mellbell: Ha! I hadn’t heard about him before, but I think Dodger made a passing reference to him last week, something along the lines of, “Sounds like she attended a Ram Dass lecture” or something like that.

Anyway, I’ve kinda exhausted the Mormon thing (although I’ll watch The Mormon Proposition when I’m in a better mood), so now I’ve turned to “mind expansion” such as. I just wanna go through It’s a Small World and the teacups, maybe even Mr. Toad fried out of my mind. I don’t expect to meet God. But if he’s a toad…

@mellbell: Damn. I’d do Sam Elliott six ways to Sunday.

@mellbell: Ho! Ho! Sam’s brisday is stuck between ours!

@Tommmcatt is with Karin Marie on This One: Well, some of us can deal with more vigorous rump humping than others…

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