Backdoor Nation
Any story that includes the line “the last time I looked at the anal sex data” gets our attention:
In 1992, 16 percent of women aged 18-24 said they’d tried anal sex. Now 20 percent of women aged 18-19 say they’ve done it, and by ages 20-24, the number is 40 percent. In 1992, the highest percentage of women in any age group who admitted to anal sex was 33. In 2002, it was 35. Now it’s 46.
What’s turning America into a nation of chimney sweeps? Here’s a telling clue:
Among women who had vaginal sex in their last encounter, the percentage who said they reached orgasm was 65. Among those who received oral sex, it was 81. But among those who had anal sex, it was 94. Anal sex outscored cunnilingus.
Now hold on before you ride the Hershey Highway — there’s a perfectly valid reason for this:
Women who were getting what they wanted were more likely to indulge their partners’ wishes. It wasn’t the anal sex that caused the orgasms. It was the orgasms that caused the anal sex.
And there’s your Lesson for the Day: Be nice to your partner, and your partner will be very nice to you.
The Ass Man Cometh [Slate, via Sully]
This is my favorite subject.
In the South it’s called “keeping the (vajayjay) virginity pledge.”
Also: Arkansas birth control
Best part – The Ass Man Cometh is Slate’s Most Read (ever?)
@¡Andrew!: Bingo, that’s the real reason that the numbers have gone up – all the bullshit medically inaccurate “Save Yourself for Marriage and Jeebus” sex ed put out in the Bush Administration along with the Purity Ring pledges made the frequency of heterosexual anal sex (and gay butt seks) go way up, especially in the red states. There’s been studies on it, which I can’t go find at this instance.
Isn’t it less pleasant for women than it is for men, due to the lack of certain glands? I’ve always thought heterosexual anal intercourse a little one-sided.
@Tommmcatt Thinks Masturbation Can Also Involve The Mainstream Media: There are a lot of nerves in there. And that’s all I have to say on the matter.
No ifs, ands, or butts. Um…about me commenting further. Um. Yeah.
@JNOV: Don’t look at me, I’m exit only.
::sigh:: I take it up the butt issue with:
Women who were getting what they wanted were more likely to indulge their partners’ wishes. It wasn’t the anal sex that caused the orgasms. It was the orgasms that caused the anal sex.
Okay. Really. I’m done.
@Tommmcatt Thinks Masturbation Can Also Involve The Mainstream Media: This is really a strange turn of events, kind of a topsy turvy thing, but have you ever tried?
@Tommmcatt Thinks Masturbation Can Also Involve The Mainstream Media: I’ll send you a starter kit of anal beads.
Speaking of virgins:
I especially like the pleading for donations to send retirees – because apparently a Social Security check just doesn’t manage to cover antigovernment agitating. Now, who possibly could have indexed those payments to a base lower than real inflation….
@al2o3cr: If I were anywhere near there, I’d organize a “We’re All Bozos on This Bus Trip” to help her out.
Anybody have HBO and watching Maher tonight? Or do I have to wait for the recap to learn whether we get a last hurrah?
@nojo: No HBO here, hombre. Got the hamsters well-rested and hydrated just in case there’s a shout out?
@SanFranLefty: If it hits, we’ll crash. And then everyone will miss the latest Anal Sex news.
ROFL @ Chimney Sweeps
@SanFranLefty: Sniffing up Iowan’s butts while thinking about running for President.
No, really. One of the things I ignored this week. Probably would have ignored it anyway.
@SanFranLefty: No shout-out, apparently. For that matter, no fresh O’Donnell clip.
@JNOV: I would never do anything to anyone that I wouldn’t let them do to me.
Thankfully it isn’t an issue with Mr. Catt.
@Tommmcatt: Wise man once say “to be a good top, you have to be a good bottom,” sabes?
Someone please tell Bryan Fisher.
Heard on ESPN Radio yesterday: “This is the time of year when guys have to trust their fast balls.”
Sport TJ/ The Brett Farve Dong story is picking up. He allegedly sent photos of his Crocs with something else in the way to a woman who worked with the NY Jets while he was on the team, which is owned by Woody Johnson.
http://deadspin.com/5658206/brett-favres-cellphone-seduction-of-jenn-sterger?skyline=true&s=i
@Tommmcatt Thinks Masturbation Can Also Involve The Mainstream Media: Good way to live your life in general. Here’s the thing: anal sex gone bad can scar you for a lifetime; anal sex gone good can bring out your inner Rick James for a lifetime. If at first you don’t succeed, wait a decade and try again…
@JNOV: I was trying to work up a joke with the Stanford Tree, USC Trojan and anal sex gone bad, but I think I’ll leave it at: “Go Tree!”
@Dodgerblue: As long as The Tree wears a condom…
@Dodgerblue and JNOV: Fear the Tree!
Sorry about Uklah’s spanking by Bezerkely, Dodger.
@SanFranLefty:@Dodgerblue: The Tree will show you the ins and outs! And you will like it!
I credit AC/DC with my first exposure to the triple entendre “backdoor” in Dirty Deeds. At twelve years old, I thought Bon meant he’d sneak in the backdoor of a house when he offered to be a “backdoor man.” I’m still convinced that’s what he meant. ;-)
Know what else? Ain’t no fun waiting round to be a millionaire.
@Dodgerblue: @SanFranLefty: Well, it’s not exactly full-on Tree buttsex, but it’s close.
@jnov and tree fans: Nice one for Harbaugh & Luck, Ltd. Missed it on account of hockee (CHI 2:3 DET, the fuckers).
@SanFranLefty: That’s OK, your boys broke the Trojans’ hearts with 0:00 on the clock. Way to go!
FLYINGCHAINSAW • Harris-Kelly ’24 PERFECTION! Bumper Sticker: HARRIS GIVES GOOD GURNEY!
NOJO • Harris-Kelly ’24 I know, getting ahead of the game here — and Gabby has the only vote — but let’s go down…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • Campaign 2024 Update 2024 General Election = White Power Vs. White Genocide The MAGAs will soon be opening fire on…
NOJO • Campaign 2024 Update Whatever table it was, just remember you didn’t have a seat at it.
NOJO • A Nation of Immigrants @nojo: Okay, here’s a thought: They broke it, they bought it.
FLYINGCHAINSAW • A Nation of Immigrants https://gettr.com/post/p38v9kc47ae
NOJO • A Nation of Immigrants @nojo: No original thoughts about the Democratic circus right now, for example, other than christ,…
NOJO • A Nation of Immigrants @Burr Deming: I may be back more often if he’s back. Right now anything I might say is just…
¡ANDREW! • A Nation of Immigrants Start the deportations by sending terrorists and fascist traitors E-loon Mush, Peter Thief, and all…
BURR DEMING • A Nation of Immigrants An accurate representation of how today's Republicans see a Nation of Immigrants. Welcome back,…