Drunk Driver, Conservative Candidate & Election Fraud Artist Drops House Race

Shitfaced Steve, Election Fraud Artist Drops Out of Arizona House Race

Shitfaced Steve, Election Fraud Artist Drops Out of Arizona House Race

Republican icon Steve May, confessed drunk driver and election fraud artist from Arizona, dropped his pathetic write-in candidacy for the District 17 Arizona State House seat, after being vilified for recruiting homeless people to stand as straw Green Party candidates in an attempt to Naderize the Democratic vote this fall, in a way only a demented drunk could imagine would be effective.

Have another beer, Steve! Have eleven! They’re small!

Steve, besides being a drunk driver, is a complete and total asshole who exploits the homeless, enabling him to give statements like this, unbothered by any pangs of conscience that would drive any sane non-Republican to swift and conclusive suicide:

“This unique experiment in democracy has also raised my own awareness, and helped me see clearly that personal and political timing must align for a campaign to truly be successful. I spoke about the need for honest leadership, and I have determined the necessary personal alignment does not exist to continue the campaign. With great respect and gratitude for all who have supported me, I am announcing today that I am terminating the campaign and am no longer a candidate in District 17,” he wrote.

Surprisingly, the uncharacteristically sober May didn’t mention the only thing that qualified him for standing as a conservative candidate: his guilty plea to drunk driving.

Staties put May in the bag in 2009 for careening shitfaced down an Arizona interstate highway at nearly 30 mph over the limit, testing out at a blood alcohol level that qualified him for the charge of “super extreme” DUI.

The judge took a crap on May’s face when the fucktard tried to get the case dismissed. May pled guilty, drew 10 days in jail and three years probation, during which time he gets to go to a fru-fru detox in Scottsdale and take expensive drugs for alcoholism.

Clearly, if May wants to stand for election under the conservative or GOP banner he is going to have to polish his credentials. A real conservative these days would at least have a record for spouse beating, bestiality and a few exotic financial frauds or, if one wants to present the profile of a serious psychoconservative, cannibalism.

As a run of the mill drunk driver, well, there wasn’t much you could expect of May. But recruiting homeless people to stand as Green Party candidates to draw votes from Democrats – and then coaching them on their campaigns, hey, that is really fucking sick, giving us confidence in May’s future as a psychoconservative political leader.


“…the necessary personal alignment does not exist to continue the campaign…”

For realz? Did crystal-healing chick Rielle Hunter write his exit statement?

Speaking of “We’re Wackier than South Crackolina AND Oklahoma” aka Arizona, did Potatoe Juniore finally get declared the winner of his primary in the House race?

Drunken showers bring May Turd Flowers.

@SanFranLefty: Yes, Quaylette aka Brock Landers won his primary. His dem opponent almost immediately started running campaign ads on Christian radio talking about Q’s lack of morality for running the Dirty website.

I should also note that the DUI isn’t what brought May down. That story was already out, though not widely covered. One paper said May’d been shopping it around the media so it wouldn’t look like an October surprise. He has also apparently been talking about it on the stump. That means there’s something else out there – something more embarrassing – to get him to quit after going through all the effort of mounting a write-in primary campaign.

My money’s on him doing meth and fucking one or more of the street people.

BREAKING: http://bit.ly/c5pffN

Court finds that street people candidates who withdrew cannot un-withdraw their candidacies. They are gone. One remaining candidate is allowed to stay on the ballot (which has already gone to the printer anyway).

Choice quote: “Mr. May’s testimony regarding the reason he encouraged the four individuals to run for office lacked credibility.”

@TJ/ Jamie Sommers /TJ: So, when will the judge order May to be kicked to death?

@FlyingChainSaw: I think he managed to avoid it by withdrawing.
Oh, and this website just posted an article saying he withdrew over finances and personal problems, but it’s behind a pay wall and I can’t read it.

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