Hey, Abe!

In his latest installment of Mystery Presidents Theater 3000, Alabama teabagger Rick Barber raises Lincoln from the dead to call income taxes “slavery”. According to published reports, Alabama teabagger Rick Barber is from Alabama.

[via TPM]

TJ/ is anybody else listening to the confirmation hearings? My head is getting splody ALREADY….

Well, add this to the “Teatard History Fail” list… Did his staffers just not have the heart to tell him that (a) Lincoln isn’t exactly a popular dude in Alabama and (b) Lincoln *created* the first income tax, in part to raise money to pay for the Civil War? We won’t even *get into* the Whig policies that Lincoln was a fan of…

The short version:

Taxing working people to pay for the rich man’s war = a good thing
Taxing the rich man to pay for the working man’s health care = Nazism

And that’s why we call them Teabaggers.

@Tommmcat Still Gets Carly Confused With Meg: I can’t bear to watch that. Confirmation hearings are so masturbatory that the nominee isn’t really required to be there.

You may wanna press both hands against your noggin’ hard to prevent a full ‘spolsion, ’cause the latest line the Far White is pushing here in WA–home of the most regressive tax structure in the nation–is that progressive taxation amounts to unfair and immoral discrimination against the wealthy. And no, this is not a joke.

@Original Andrew: Again, the fallacy which forms the ironic point of the observation “the law, in its majestic equality, forbids both the rich and the poor from sleeping under bridges.” These people would hate those countries where criminal fines are pegged to a percentage of wealth/income, so that a rich person pays a vastly greater fine, for speeding, as an example, than a poor person does.


Like that billionaire in Sweden (?) who got a speeding ticket for $150,000?

Yeah, here in WA, someone making six figures pays around 3% of their income in taxes and fees, while people making under $30K pay around 18%. We have no state income tax, so most state revenue comes from sales taxes and fees–it’s insane.

They’re getting really desperate on the budget: They’ve already slashed state university support, laid off thousands of teachers, and proposed privatizing some state-run businesses, like liquor sales. The only thing left is to cut K-12 altogether, so as a result there’s currently an initiative-campaign to institute a high-income earners’ income tax to close the gap.

Can’t wait for Paul Allen and Craig McGraw to launch tearful teevee ads detailing the suffering of their people.

@Original Andrew: TJ/ Please, please, please email me — I need to ask you about a shirt. JNOVJezebel at gmail.

@OA: Meh. eBay robbed me blind.

You say you’re lookin’ for someone
Never weak but always strong
To protect you an’ defend you
Whether you are right or wrong
Someone to open each and every door
But it ain’t me, Abe
No, no, no, it ain’t me, Abe
It ain’t me you’re lookin’ for, Abe

I can’t be the only person who thought of that, right?

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