Gene Taylor (D-Mizzippi) would like folks to calm the fuck down about that black death approaching the shore:

What I want people to know is this isn’t Katrina. This is not Armageddon. I did this for the Coast Guard many years ago. Yeah, it’s bad. And it’s terrible that there’s a spill out there. But I would remind people that the oil is twenty miles from any marsh… That chocolate-milk looking spill starts breaking up in smaller pieces… It is tending to break up naturally.

Nice try, Gene, but BP is only paying those five-grand hush-money checks to Alabama right now.

Rep. Taylor Downplays Gulf Oil Disaster By Comparing It To Spilt ‘Chocolate Milk’ [ThinkProgress]

AG: BP Trying To Get Alabamians To Give Up Right To Sue Over Spill [TPM]

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Try telling that to the people of Cordova, Alaska, 21 years after Valdez — where kids are still finding oil-covered rocks and where alcoholism, suicide and domestic violence increased.

I’m assuming the good congressman thinks that unlike chocolate milk spilled oil simply disappears somewhere. Maybe he believes that like a lost pet this mass of crude oil will find its back home. As a veteran of cleaning up numerous chocolate milk spills I wish it was so accommodating.

Wait until the Gulf hurricanes hit and spread this goo over the entire basin. A lot of expensive beachfront real estate could literally go into the toilet. Who doesn’t think the owners will expect the taxpayers to cover their loss?

Right, the next time someone eats BBQ for a week straight and then takes a splattering, runny shit on your face we’ll call it a greeting.

In my salad days as an engineer, I once worked as a geological technician who took soil samples. One thing I learned was that hydrocarbon soaked soil is a bitch to remove and does not dissipate.

Taylor, you dumbass.

If it’s like chocolate milk, let’s see him drink some.

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