Dr. Palin: Charged Particles Responsible for Climate Change
Esteemed climate scientist Dr. Sarah Palin released the findings today from a dangerous expedition she recently led to gather ice core data from the polar caps of Greenland. Aided by her husband, the renowned adventurer and explorer Todd Palin, who led the dog sled team that carried the Palins, their equipment, and a contingent of Tea Party Activists to the edge of the arctic caps, Palin spent three weeks gathering spectroscopic readings, drilling and analyzing ice cores for trapped C02 and taking precise temperature measurements and ice thickness readings. The results, which will no doubt shock the scientific world and will be published shortly in the esteemed scientific journal Twitter, blame charged particles, or ions, for the recent rise in global temperatures. Palin’s upcoming scientific paper is reproduced, in its entirety, below:
Earth saw clmate chnge4 ions;will cont 2 c chnges.R duty2responsbly devlop resorces4humankind/not pollute&destroy;but cant alter naturl chng
A world conference of climate experts is expected to be called to discuss the explosive new findings sometime in the coming weeks.
Yeah, but she’ll quit when she realizes that the supposed riches and perks that climate scientists are to get under a Global Warming scenario as outlined by morans like Stossel, Rush, Bekc, Inhofe, Exxon et al don’t make up for the thinking and work required.
I’m counting the minutes till the Palin/Kristol sex tape is leaked (sorry about that) and Todd elopes with Levi to get gay married in Iowa.
Those drowning polar bears are just a bunch of librul vegetarian atheists who hate jesus. If they ate right and prayed for strong legs and ice flows, they’d live but oh, no, they want to be all PC and live on plankton and get all weak and gangly and then when the ice doesn’t appear, they refuse to pray to their lord and god and what can you expect is going to happen? Yeah, no ice for you Mr Polar Bear. You drown and jesus has a big belly laugh and a nice long Ballantine Ale piss on your face before he sends you to hell, furball.
celeb tj/One of our spies saw Cormack McCarthy shopping at Ross Dress for Less near our place in Santa Fe.
Homophones – so hard!
/I’m sure Sarah thinks a homophone is what Benedick uses to call Members of Congress
@shortsshortsshorts: Shorts!! Long time, no see.
@SanFranLefty: “ion” and “eon” are homophones now? When did they come out?
Stinque Programming Note: Our Cloture Open Thread starts at 12:30 ET tonight. Or tomorrow morning, depending on how you view these things.
@Promnight: It’s her weird Alaska-Minnesota accent, doncha know.
T/J aimless bitching: why isn’t the Steelers game on in L.A.? I don’t give a goddam about the 49ers and no one else in L.A. does either.
@nojo: You don’t seriously think I’m awake past 10:30 do you? Except for sometimes.
@Dodgerblue: The end of the Steelers game was the best thing I have seen in pro football in years, time out, 0 seconds on the clock, Roethlisberger throws an 18 yard TD, just so perfectly thrown and caught, beautiful.
MANCHUCANDIDATE • Quentin Tarantino presents Action Joe and Mister Z @SanFranLefty: Wiped out
SANFRANLEFTY • Quentin Tarantino presents Action Joe and Mister Z @ManchuCandidate: Bitch, March Madness is ON! xoxo
MELLBELL • Quentin Tarantino presents Action Joe and Mister Z @nojo: I mooch Disney+ from my sister and HBO Max from my ex. Still need a Hulu hookup though!
MELLBELL • Quentin Tarantino presents Action Joe and Mister Z @ManchuCandidate: As a veteran of last year's tournament, you were re-invited with one click, so…
MELLBELL • Quentin Tarantino presents Action Joe and Mister Z @nojo: I'm just late, as ever. The play-in games started Tuesday, but we've got until tomorrow.…
NOJO • Software Update of the Year @bruce.desertrat: I have failed to get any work done since that dropped.
BRUCE.DESERTRAT • Software Update of the Year Disturbing my cow-orkers laughing at this....
NOJO • Quentin Tarantino presents Action Joe and Mister Z @¡Andrew!: I tried RRR a few times at Benedick’s insistence, just couldn’t last. And now…
¡ANDREW! • Quentin Tarantino presents Action Joe and Mister Z @nojo: I watched the clips on YouTube. Lady Gaga’s performance was extraordinarily honest and…
NOJO • Quentin Tarantino presents Action Joe and Mister Z @ManchuCandidate: Oh gee, that starts tomorrow? Haven’t heard from Mellbell, so guess not.