This Candidate Will Self-Destruct in 90 Minutes

We can only hope. After John McCain failed to blow his head off last time, we despaired that we’d ever get to see the Bruckheimer-quality conflagration we paid good money on beer to watch. But coming off a weekend calling Barry a terrorist and a liar and a bad tipper, we expect the Psychogeezer to show us the Right Stuff that destroyed three jets.

And so we open tonight’s Live Blog/Open Thread/Snuff Film with the anticipation that we’ll be witnessing history, finally putting to rest Richard Nixon’s 48-year record as America’s Sweathog. Whatever your drinking game, make sure you save a bottle for the post-meltdown celebration.

Showtime!

9:03. Barry and McCain hug, frisk each other for concealed weapons.

9:05. Pyramid Hefeweizen. “Refreshingly Unfiltered.” Unlike most of the answers tonight.

9:08. Tonight’s Hail Mary: I will save America by buying it.

9:10. Firesign Theatre: “Take your television’s advice. And y’know more TV’s recommend an amazing new psychic breakthrough than any other, and that’s… Confidence in the System. Fast, safe, and guaranteed through constant Federal control, Confidence in the System will keep THEM in power longer, longer, longer, and tend to calm and obscure the miseries of disillusionment and despair. In easy-to-swallow Propaganda form or new fast-acting Thought Control, that’s Confidence in the System. So have some… today.”

9:16. Barry uses “impact” as a verb. But we knew in advance he wasn’t a perfect candidate.

9:19. Speaking of letters, Barry wrote this one to Bernanke and Paulson back in March 2007: “We cannot sit on the sidelines while increasing numbers of American families face the risk of losing their homes…” Like we say, Sully’s good for something.

9:26. Barry: “You’re paying $3.80 here in Nashville for gasoline.” Backstage, high fives between the advance guys.

9:29. Earmarks? $18 billion out of a $3 trillion budget. Can’t even buy a minor bailout with that kind of change these days.

9:34. Barry cites the earmarks number. He must have heard us shouting at the TV.

9:37. Tom Brokaw cuts Barry off from responding to McCain’s budget bullet points. Tom Brokaw, you’re no John Chancellor.

9:42. McCain: “Have the smartest people in America come together.” You mean… ELITES?

9:45. In our imaginary debate, Lewis Black is moderating. We feel better now.

9:58. Um, Barry, yeah, Delaware does have “loose” credit-card laws, but your running-mate might have a few thoughts on that.

10:07. McCain on military intervention: “That requires a cool hand at the tiller.” Yes, he said that. Oops, gotta catch a helicopter!

10:12. Did McCain just say Tollybon? Is there no trend Barry doesn’t start?

10:14. Once again, 75 minutes in, Barry lets the bait out. “Bomb bomb bomb Iran?” We want that follow-up.

10:16. McCain: “I’m going to act responsibly as I’ve acted throughout my military career.” C’mon, dude, that’s too easy.

10:24. Brokaw: “This question requires only a Yes or No answer.” No it doesn’t. The question whether Russia is evil requires an explanation. One example why Brokaw sucks.

10:34. And to close, my friends, FlyingChainSaw: “Obama needs to rip this piece of shit’s arms off and beat him to death with the wet ends. He is letting the Psychogeezer and his toy go too easy. He needs to piss in Psychogeezer’s face and make him cry.”

Thank you and good night.

423 Comments

You know — McCain has not been in sequestered debate prep — but actually out there giving speeches. He might be totally exhausted. In which case — look the fuck out.

OMG, Keiff O. just said “juggling chainsaws” – shout out to FCS!!

@SanFranLefty: The “make sure one doesn’t drop on anyone” line was … odd. I mean, why else would you juggle them in the first place?

Did everyone else know that it was supposed to be an internet/”townhall” free-for-all? Ugh! As much as I’m suspicious of hyper-moderation, the alternative isn’t talking snowmen on youtube. Why is moderation in moderation such a hard thing to achieve?

Tweety: Sleeper cell!

KO: Grumpy McCain!

Anyone else on CNN? They have the HR monitor again.

What are our trigger words for drinking? I need to know!

Tequila here, to go with any Jeebus (shout out to D Boon)

SanFranLefty: Don’t look at me — we went with the suffix “-stan” here for Round 1. We wuz sloshed.

Tweety? I think that Obama has given, you know, a little thought to his personal security.

@chicago bureau: What A Bad Idea that was!

I do like KO’s use of the phrase “ginned up.” That’s the plan, Keith, that’s the plan.

Brian Willams sez that the clowns undecided voters were picked by Gallup. So blame those guys.

Brokaw’s face is a little baked apple-esque these days, isn’t it?

One month to the election…don’t remind me…

Ooof. The McGrimace is back. Yeesh.

Geezer looked stiff on that handshake there.

@SanFranLefty: I just sent in my ballot today! It was a nice feeling.

Are there any black undecided voters around tonight?

Ooooh, Obama’s going all Oprah with the mic and the talking to the people thing!

@SanFranLefty: They’re busy bombing the Pentagon, then getting PhDs in education.

Barry’s just served an ace up. Nice start.

@SanFranLefty: We go way back. Share the pics with you some day.

@SanFranLefty: No. Obvs, they will all be voting for the black guy, just like all women voted for Hillry.

10 TRILLION debt mostly caused by the Iraq war and tax cuts to the rich and douchesacks of Wall St.

@chicago bureau: But he didn’t bring up PG’s plan to cut Medicare – perfect response to a question about how to help retirees…

It seems really mean to make McCain totter around like a flippered weeble-wobble right after Suavely Mobile Obama.

Also: Dude! We know about the debt. We know.

I think Psycho-G has a personal space issue. He was getting a little close to some of those audience members, and a few of them looked a bit alarmed.

Uh… loan buy-backs? Didn’t we just do that?

MY FRIENDS – drink!

MY FRIENDS again – double drink!

Question 1 – Obama – sucky answer.

Geez – energy independence?
taxes
purchase mortgages –

McCain’s gettin’ all …. funny? That was weird.

[WHISTLE]

Three-in-the-key. Barry’s ball!

Is this a commercial for male pattern baldness?

PG doesn’t know who he’s going to appoint as Treasury Secretary?

I’ve never noticed before that PG whistles when he talks?

Buffett? In your fucking dreams!
Meg Whitman?

@Nojo: Join us in the threads.

@Obama: Answer the fucking question. Just say Corzine or Bloomberg or Buffett.

OMG! A black man is undecided.

PG points out to the audience that one of the smartest men in the country is for Obama.

Why would Warren accept such a shit-job as Treasury Secretary?

Idiot – PHIL GRAMM was the one that lit this fire.

“I betcha ya never heard of Fannie Mae or Freddie Mac, since you’re a young black buck like Barry”

Hey, what you Stinquers drinking? Got a premium amber cachasa to make my carpirhina. Veddy nice.

Suspend? Suspend? Christ.

Uh-oh. Geezer going off on Barry’s connections? Here we go.

Hey! Black guy!

Bail-out vs. rescue? Is that like strategy vs. tactic?

Uh…bringing up the campaign suspension?

Any student with loans is familiar with Fanny and/or Freddy, dude.

OK, here we are, Fannie and Freddie aren’t the culprits, they do not do subprime, lying old fuck, and blaming Obama?

Debate prep –

Take stump speech, slice up, ignore question, attack, brag

@nojo: I will save America by buying it.
His beer-heiress wife will save the economy and pay off your house! yay!!

@FlyingChainSaw: Crappy wine I bought at a drugstore. Appropriate.

Why do I have that dumb Billy Joel song, “We Didn’t Start the Fire” running through my head.

That lady in the front row is totally checking out the Unicorn.

PG: Franny [sic] and Freddie went out and gave all those loans to Barry’s homeless friends, and that’s why we’re in this mess, MY FRIENDS!

@FlyingChainSaw: cheap red French wine.
Sarcasm..nice touch, Barry.

Ooooh, Obama getting kind of mean is turning me on.

Okay, bring out the real candidates now

Gonna have to try your advice on good capirhana, or however you spell it, FCS.

I have to correct. . . NOT SURPRISNGLY. I like that. McCain’s campaign manager’s firm was a lobbyist, not me; is geezer squirming?

RICK DAVIS RICK DAVIS RICK DAVIS RICK DAVIS.

I’m busting a gut and it’s only 9:16

Not surprisingly = smug. Not a good start. But rolling on McCain being a deregulator. And also the Rick Davis thing. Pointish to Barry.

But we know we are going with Geezer here — straight into the gutter.

MGD for me, btw.

@FlyingChainSaw: Chillin. I have a 7:30 breakfast meeting. I should go make some coffee.

@BRB: Me too. First I started to ovulate with the Gawker picture that MellBell linked to, and now I’m getting all tingly when Obama gets mean.

Fundamentals. Geezer’s greatest hits. I’m liking this.

So we want to buy bad home loans because . . . ? Shit, buy my GOOD home loan.

@FlyingChainSaw: Gin, gin, gin and more gin.

Teresa! Spit it out! She might actually crack and kill one or both of them.

Hopey is cutting and slicing, but all very policy and issue oriented. McCain is obviously heavily medicated. Buy up all the mortgages and write them all down to the value of the home? Thats what the democratic proposal did with the bankrutcy provisions, McCain seems to be saying we are gonna reward every owner of a fucking Mcmansion, the dumber and richer they were, the more they gain, without a bankrptcy, a huge giveaway. Socialism to a greater degree than anything the dmeocrats proposed.

Cuz Demrats is good f’tha economy, Ms Carrot Top

Stoly & cranberry. Mostly Stoly. It would be insane not to …

I really think Obama should mention something about hte fact that even if we do pump oil out of Alaska, it wil just be sold to Asia.

http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2002245699_export17m.html

Box wine for me, Inglenook cask select cabernet, $9.99 for 3 liters. Better than many of the bargain chilean and spanish wines I try to find for $6.99 and $7.99 a bottle.

Listen to Geezer’s staggered and labored breathing on the mike (CNN).

Drill drill drill, fuse those atoms.

Geezer’s rant will get run up the pole and hammered afterwards. But does it sound good? It just might. Stronger for the old man here.

@SanFranLefty: Drug store? What kind?
@redmanlaw: It can’t be so late out there!

@chicago bureau: Yeah, but its all lies and he doesn’t mean a word of it.

GRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrr . . . Psychogeezer is a snake, a sidewinder, an evil creep.

“Not going to provide the same benefits to workers and retirees…”

DANGER DANGER DANGER

I can do everything! Except take care of old people who aren’t married to beer baron heiresses! Enjoy the iceflow we strap you to once you’re too old or sick to work!

Wait a sec, did McWarHero just mention Russ Feingold as his close personal friend? Oh yeah, that watered down campaign finance “reform” bill from yesteryear…

@FlyingChainSaw: 7:26 in the Mtn Time Zone. We got 8 ins of snow at the local ski area.

Whole buncha nucular plants!! Wheeee!
SFL, I’ve had to stop drinking on “my friends” cause I’m on my last bottle of wine.
Tom is upset they’re not playing by the rules. Palin woulda made his head explode.

@Promnight: Ypioca Ouro. The real deal. Very flavorful.

Was Geezer using his magic marker again to take notes?

Totally heard the heavy breathing – he’s gasping for air!

@FlyingChainSaw: Re: which drug store – come out to the Southwest (or the West). Walgreen’s, CVS, and Longs sell alcohol in many states. Some states just beer and wine.

A child of the depression – just like you, PsychoGeezer!

If Geezer wins on an “overhead projector” — that would be something.

Cutbacks for the VA? Oooof.

@Nojo: Only $3.86 a gallon in Nashville? Rptrcub better get his ass up to Music City ASAP. We’re only paying $3.74 in San Francisco.

PG: We’re not rifle shots here, we’re Americans!

No, we’re Money Shots!

I need a little snort of something strong. I have nothing good, I have some cheap bourbon, I have some Tanqueray, I have some really really good vodka, but I need something with flavor. The dollar’s weakness has put decent single malt out of my reach, I am at a loss. Vodka on the rocks? Cheap bourbon on the rocks, its decent, forget the name right now. I think those are my choices, what do you all think?

“Cut some programs”…that’s right old people, he’s gonna take your Medicare.
“We’re not rifle shots, we’re Americans.” WTF?

Overhead projector, WTF century are you from?

OMG, the Depression-era crusties are in totalt Depression/ration mode.

Good lord, shut up about the goddamn overhead projector.

“We’re not rifle-shots here, we’re Americans” Whaaaa?

Obama: 9/11? Whaaaa?

@chicago bureau: What’s an overhead projector, Grampa Simpson?

BTW: Geezer’s visted the back of the stage a couple of times now. Mark this.

Awkward reference to 9/11 by the Dem1: drink!

Unicorn has a Peace Corps shout-out to all you P.C. exes!

Is he calling a state of the art planetarium projector an overhead projector? Fuckwit.

When will Barry kill the earmarks issue by reminding the people that the total is less than 1%! Take McInsane’s power.

@SanFranLefty: $3.13 – $3.16 at the tribal gas stations or at grocery store gas stations with a discount of up to 15 cents per gallon depending on the amount spent at the grocery store.

Peace sells – but who’s buying?

Well Tom, I know I’m getting drunk.

@Promnight: Vodka. You’ll have a headache tomorrow morning with cheap bourbon, and this is a school night.
@nabisco: I thought the 9/11 reference made sense. Made sense to me, but not to the average U.S. ‘merikan.

@SanFranLefty: “A really expensive tool black people in Chicago steal from the government to use to smoke crack.”

btw: The Obama 9/11 evocation worked, I think. That “consumer confidence” bullcrap needs to be remembered.

Hear it is, Lonbordin, he is talking about the earmarks, but he should have used the percentage, he didn’t compare the total cost of the McCain tax cut to the total savings of cutting earmarks, he missed the shot.

How is it going? I am watching ‘All About Eve’, which in some ways is very timely.

Unicorn doesn’t agree with PsychoGeezer – DRINK!

Actually, the last guy to raise taxes during an economic downturn was Bill Clinton. That didn’t turn out so bad.

Hoover! That’s who we need to emulate!

Oooooh, Obama is full of secrets!

This is ugly bullshit now.

Okay, I am watching right this second. Why is PG holding his microphone like that? Townhalls are seriously his best venue? He looks like Mini-Me.

PG: Have more babies and you will win a big tax cut!

@chicago bureau: I was thinking George HW Bush, but I’ll accept your answer.

Okay, PG is channeling Shrub – he keeps saying “Merikans” and doing the Beavis-esque “heh heh heh” laughing at his own jokes when the audience sits there stone faced.

My friends! Fuck, I am running out of wine. Can they take a half-time break so I can go to the drug store again? I knew I needed to buy more wine.

@Promnight: Amen he needs to use the studies that refute those tax numbers I’m hearing McInsane.

I’m Crazy Eddie, I’m giving it away!

Brokaw with balls… The Scared Cows are in play

Tom Brokaw needs to pull that fucking stick out of his ass. His head would have sploded if he had been running the Veep debate.

OK, Tom is almost grumpier than Grandpa Simpson.
Lost a wheel…got a giggle.

@SanFranLefty: Pace yourself for the next 40 mins then go staggering out for more hooch if need be.

TOM BROKAW MUST DIE.

Letting McCain get away with that crap? Unforgivable.

@homofascist: Mini-Me with flippers.

Unfair advantage for Unicorn – former law school professor used to addressing a crowd in the round.

My friends! Fuck! Running out of wine….room service…

obligatory suck to Reagan.

C’mon, PG, say that you’re such a Maverick you’re going to slash Medicare. Kiss Florida adios.

My friends! Fuck! No more wine at this rate. I see your point Cynica…

McCain’s big plan is to….allude to past bipartisan committees? Because they were so…successful?

Yeah, base closing was a HUGE success

Maverick, the mavericky maverick! He takes on his own party. “Lets have the american people here tell us to solve the problem.” Ohhh.

Medicare = blue-ribbon panel. That always works. Check with John Breaux and Max Baucus on that one, please.

@nojo: Let’s hear them complain about the liberal media now.

He avoids excess spending? FUCK YOU GEEZER FUCK!

Hey McCain!
Who runs your campain?
fuckin’ insane.

Okay, not to be a total bitch about this. (My friends! Fuck!)

But PG needs to stop raising his flippers up to shoulder height – b/c Obama could come up and raise his hands up over his head.

OMG! Another a black voter!

@Dodger: And she’s a tree hugger!

Tonight: “disagree with Bush on the environment.”

Tomorrow: “drill baby drill.”

Phony.

Crapalula, I feel like I’ve missed out on so much by actually doing my grad school homework tonight.

Annnd, he can’t remember the black woman’s name. Nice.
Nucular power will save the environment.

I actually don’t disagree with increasing use of nuke power, sorry to say, its gonna be easier to deal with nuke waste than with terraforming the earth and dealing with sealevel rise and global warming.

Another “My friends!” FUCK!

And I love his “Obama seems concerned with nuclear safety or something like that” – lovely PG!

At least PG can pronounce NU-KLEE-AR correctly.

GEEZER! I GREW UP WITH A WOMAN WHOSE DAUGHTER WAS BORN WITHOUT EYES BECAUSE OF NUCLEAR WASTE IN HANFORD! DON’T FUCKING TELL ME WHAT’S SAFE, DICKWEED.

Sorry, got a little shouty there.

He wants American to do something FRENCH?

Psychogeezer, no fruit cup you !

Actually, that was the Internet, not the computer, that was invented by the guv-mint (and Al Gore), Barry.

But are you all noticing his multiple allusions to things of the future like computers that Barry is making?

Yes, 26 years in Warshington! Nice, Barry.

Alternative fuels? Just say “ethanol.” Lock down Iowa, why don’t you?

Boy those factcheck.org folks are going to have their hands full after this one.

@SanFranLefty: Change the game, girlfriend. If you drink every time he says “my friends” you’re gonna have to cancel everything tomorrow.

And I want to appoint a special committee of Stinquers to tell me how I might survive the next month until my trip to Argentina, liver intact, so I can see first-hand how a society deals with economic collapse and rallies back.

“I would buy a DC fishing license and a new rod, thereby helping local conservation programs and putting more money into the Dingell-Johnson fund that goes back to the states for game and fish programs there.”

Hopey is kinda stumbling a bit. Needs more succinct capsule summations of policys, deliver them, then use the last few seconds to zing McCain.

PG is such a broken record, WHY is he pissing away the opportunity to get specific to keep regurgitating his “reaching across the aisle” shtick? Did Talibunny coach him or something?

@FlyingChainSaw: I think somebody slipped him some stims in that fruit cup. He’s absolutely manic.

Brokaw is the one about to have the meltdown…

My friends – count up to 17, mas o menos.

Goodies! I like goodies! I’ve been a good boy. Give me my goodies! GIMME GIMME GIMME!

Goodies for everybody… what’s wrong with that if they are truly for everybody.

He really says ‘my friends’ all the fucking time. It’s such a classic snake oil salesman affectation. He’s fucking parody proof.

GEEZER! FUCK YOU!

Friend of Flippin eck: “He’s such a sad little man!”

Is anyone gonna bring up vicious, race-baiting, lynch-mob hate fest campaigning?

“That one”? He calls Barry “that one”??
How did the Obama campaign get the blond with the healthcare question in there?

@FlyingChainSaw: Yeah his body language is all slimy used-car salesman.

I think I’m drunk on jimador reposado already…not enough fat or carbs on that tilapia

@Pedonator: I don’t know how I will survive and I don’t have a trip to Argentina in my future. Pass me a note in the back of class on gmail and I will point you to all of my favorite places in that fabulous country. I’m trying to get Mr. SFL to agree that’s where we’ll go when Palin steals the election. He’s all hung up on the fact that he doesn’t speak Spanish. Not like the Argentinians understood the Mexican-Texas Spanish that I speak.

@Mistress Cynica: I’m really appreciating Jim Lehrer in retrospect.

There was a column on indianz.com today saying that Todd Palin and the kids could qualify for free health care services through the Indian Health Service, assuming that he is in fact Native Alaskan.

OK, I lurv they squeezed in a question about the environment, but neither one of them said anything to reassure me. Economy always trumps environment, until there’s a Correction. Sheeple, half of our cousins, the mammalian race, is dying out, or refusing to reproduce, or maybe just too depressed to have hot mammal-sex. What kind of demographics is that gonna give you in 2012?

The other hand taketh away – FUCK YOU OBAMA!

Shove your bible up your ass!

RIP OFF THE GEEZ’s arm and beat him to death with the wet end – THAT”S WHAT GOD WANTS!

oh bible taketh and giveth…

I wish I had trademarked “change”…

Belvedere vodka, a good shot, ice, burns nice, more satisfying than I thought it would be, nice.

@FlyingChainSaw: I have a little pad of paper next to my laptop where I’m making a slash every time he says “my friends” – he’s up to 20.

“Government will do this and government will do that.”

Shit, John — the private sector hasn’t been doing this and hasn’t been doing that. But — then again — it sounds good. Can he get away with it? Of course he can — it’s happened before.

I wonder how much a year of insurance will cost in Mc Cain land?
Maybe 5k give or take?!

HAIR TRANSPLANTS?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?

Biden just broke a television set. And with good reason.

@Mistress Cynica: OMFFSM, I hope that Keith Ohhhh and Rachel (hi kids!) pick up on the “that one” out of McSame’s mouth – did you hear me shrieking from 2000 miles away?

@SanFranLefty: I’ll go with you. Argentina, they gots beef, they gots great wine, lets go, we don’t need no stinking boat, we need an expat communal entrepenuerial commune.

If the Geezer wants to win, why the hell is his health plan so feeble?

Go Hopey, he said it, healthcare is a right!

OK. One hour in? Geezer — stiff, hackneyed. Obama — calm as a cucumber.

And he just brought up his moms.

Obama is burning it up with the right v. responsibility rhetoric, plus cancer-stricken mama. I sat up.

@Pedonator: Even more ‘tarded Joe Six Packs for Talibunny to wink at.

@Promnight: Bird hunting and trout fishing, occasional war with LaDoucheLand

@all: Riesling Kabinett here. Cold and delicious.

Yess! Whip out the SCHIP opposition!

(excuse the wonkiness)

@BRB: Plugz makes fun of his plugs. After Johnnnny Mill had his $400 haircut, Plugz said, “I don’t think my hairplugs cost 400 bucks.”

Arizona = McCain
Delaware = Biden

Ooops. Do not mention Delaware and the credit cards. Somebody shoulda told Black Eagle that.

God, Hopey is such a wonk, I loooove it, but its not gonna get him the votes of the undecided dull normals.

Ooooh! Peace through war! Here we go!

What did Geez just say after Hopey got done? He’s mumbling so badly.

My friends count – up to 22
Lost track of his “merikas” and “merikan”

@BRB: I get verklempt every time Barry mentions his mom, and he doesn’t do it often.

That one story – he fought with the companies that were arguing that cancer was a ‘pre-existing condition’ will do more than any discussion over money. Tells the whole story. The whole racket is a scheme to deny care at ALL COSTS. Why? Because the insurer has corporate council paid for you and fucking don’t. So pay. And fucking die. And fuck you! Rip his fucking arms off, Barry!

we’re a nation of good.

O’rly!

Has anybody noticed that the questions are vanilla in the extreme?

@Ewalda: He asked snidely if any one heard how much the “fine” would be. Prick.

Hey, Barry! Flip that script! “I don’t understand.” Lovely.

@SanFranLefty: Well, indeed. But that was a pretty super-gross aside by McCain.

@FlyingChainSaw: why do you think Mama Obama died at age 52, FSM bless her? Pre-existing condition of cancerous cells.

@All – My friends tally up to 23 (recorded on the pad of paper – I’m sure I missed a few when I refilled my drink).

@redmanlaw: Do you go on the wagon periodically? I should. Hey, its better than not. Its not my liver, my pancreas needs rest. But not before the election, thats all I ask, not before the election.

Yay! Economic constraints on US America military action around the world.

Oh, but they can just conjure up more money for any old thing these days, right? (Except for healthcare or social security or food stamps or anything related to basic infrastructure.)

Guess the world is gonna have to get used to “boots on the ground”…?

Does all the billions seem kind of small after all the bailout jabber???

I’m almost sure a million is pocket change now.

@redmanlaw: What could be more peaceful than death?

@SanFranLefty: Oh, gosh, it’s sad in that it is an oft told tale.

I am taking really small sips or I’d have to refill and I have to be moderate given my schedule this fortnight.

@FlyingChainSaw: But at all costs, make sure you pay up before you die. Killing doesn’t come cheap you know.

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND. STOP FUCKING SAYING THAT.
Sorry, take it anymore.

Victory?

General Petraeus. General David… Petraeus. White courtesy phone, please.

@redmanlaw: War is Peace! Commodities are Responsibilities! Enormous Oil Companies are Small Businesses! Occupation is Victory!

FUCK YOU GEEZER, victory with honor, jeeze, that was Nixon’s slogan, peace with honor.

Al-qaeda had a base in Iraq, F**KING LIAR!

PANTS ON FIRE!

Tally pad is up to 26 “my friends” – please, Keith, Rachel, Jon, Steven, someone please steal this tally from me.

A cool hand on the tiller? And this is you… how, exactly?

Peace keeping! Peace makers!

Psychogeezer, FUCK YOU! I hope you’re getting nice enemas from the Talibunny because you are making a fucking complete asshole out of yourself in this campaign, you witless fuck.

Geezer says he is cool and collected?
Oh, Precious Holy Blood!

I love that the Unicorn pronounces Pakistan correctly. Tingles.

pokaestan v packistan
discuss

I did not know Teddy Roosevelt… you sir are no Teddy Roosevelt.

@blogenfreude: Vanilla questions are guaranteed when the “public” asks them — that’s why McCain wanted twenty of these things, full of softballs.

Although frankly, Brokaw is disgusting me tonight.

You would not announce that you would attack a country? Christ almighty — what the fuck was Iraq?

@SanFranLefty: My roommate’s take: “Music to my ears.”

Kill bin Laden? Didn’t Kerry say we should try him? The times, they are changin’.

@redmanlaw: Its a conundrum, like Churchill, I think I take more from alcohol than it takes from me, but also, I do need a rest occasionally. Good for you. For me, after the election. I need to be drunk now. Bad. That Blevedere did the perfect trick.

Geezer is completely incoherent now on Pakistan.

Oh, fuck, Geez, Geez, that line about Announcing an Attack on Pakistan is FUCKING PATHETIC.

Can it. It makes you look almost as lame and fucked in the head as you really are!

FUCK YOU!

“Afghan Freedom Fighters”. Oh, you mean the guys who are shooting at us now?

Nice Freudian slip there PG, lucky you didn’t say that Obama “has a big stick”

Oooof, Teddy Roosevelt is kind of a….non-“cool” example.

Oh really, announcing an attack is a bad idea? What about if we are talking to Iran? Does it not count if we sing it, rather tahn say it?

“Teddy Roosevelt!” drink!
Afghan freedom fighters against Russia = the Taliban, you moran.

I’d pay for Tom to tackle either of them…. anytime now.

@BRB: Yay! Black Eagle mentions the warmongering! Woo hoo!

with apologies to rptrcub, Faster Unicorn! Kill!! Kill!!

Go Unicorn! Faster, faster, faster, KILL, KILL, KILL!!!!

Obama, quit calling him Senator McCain and call him ‘this mendacious, coddled, old fucking psychopathic wife-abandoner’

I can’t stop laughing. Tom Brokaw can’t manage anything. McCain’s flat lining while Barry’s all KILL KILL KILL BINLADEN.

This is political comedy at it’s finest.

Fuck rules… I need two men enter one man leaves…

For those wondering, yes, SFL and I were separated at birth.

Mistress Cynica SanFranLefty

“That was the definitive answer. Charles Nelson Reilly?”

“Well, Gene, I had Faster Faster Faster, Live Live Live”

[buzzer]

@SanFranLefty: @Mistress Cynica: Ooh, I think we just had a liveblogged simultaneous orgasm.

@lonbordin: agreed, and resolved: Brokaw is terrible

Not all cultures need or want democracy. Discuss.

Dude! McCain! The fucking Surge is NOT going to work in the long run! That’s why he’s not apologizing!

Not a Cold War, a really Hot One!

PG: “Ill go after bin Laden myself, and I’ll chew his limbs off with my teeth, and then I’ll suck his blood and chomp on his stringy diabetic musculature, and then I’ll boil his entrails in a pot of gold and stomp on his remnants, and then we’ll see who talks softly, beeyatch!”

@ lonbordin – Absolutely <begins banging pipe on cage chanting “two men enter…one man leaves — two men enter…one man leaves”

Not a bad idea…would cull those not willing to perish for the position…

Yeah, hem in Roosha. They love that.

@redmanlaw:
True. If the people of a nation want it, they’ll form it.

Jamming down a political system down peoples throats worked so well for Communism.

zzzzzzz Georgia zzzzzzzz
OMG everyone is now channel surfing.

@nabisco: And I hate his +2 Bracelet of Ersatz Athleticism.

Fuck you Tom, “Evil” is a fucking moron word.

I haven’t seen Brokaw on the TV for almost 20 years. Just when did he become a puffed-up old fart? Oh, wait, he always was…

HEY we’re getting near the end…

NO Keating mention?!

I think “muddle through” was a subtle signal to the 90% of the US American populace who are now alcoholics (for once I’m in the majority). Just muddle, it’s the new mixology, add a pinch of mint, some lime juice, sugar, rum, muddle, hey presto you’ve got a mojito!

This guy really needs a yarmulke to cut down on the glare….

Or would you wait for the U.N.? That’s not an undecided voter right there. Gimme question.

Is it me, or does Psychogeezer look like a homeless guy someone gave a bath and a suit from K-Mart?

This last question is a fucking joke. How fucking gross. “What if your wife and child were raped and killed by Iranians? What would you do then, as a former war hero?”

@nabisco: That’s why I only watch PBS. Me lurves Gwen and Jim compared to this shit. Although I have a major soft spot the size of Fort Worth reserved for Bob Schieffer, so I’m looking forward to the next debate.
@Mistress Cynica: Wonder twins activate, in the form of copy editing snarky cynical goddesses!

@LuxMentis: @nabisco: Thanks… sniff… best moment of the night.

“Thank you Terry”.

Jesus. He looks like fucking Yoda (no offense to your Pez dispenser, Nojo).

McCain said we need the same strategy in Afghanistan as in Iraq, meaning the surge, but then he immediately said its gonna have to be very very different. Umm, OK.

What a bad answer to a dumb question about Israel. Dumbass.

Hey,where’s JNOV? Where’s Baked? I need off the wall input straight from the id.

OK – Early Calls –

No knockouts, lots of grappling. Geezer’s fouls got Eagle wanting to follow up. Tonight was not a game changer. Geezer still behind.

I’m so glad Psychogeezer has finally got to Iran, the true threat to all that is holy in US American life, and managed to work in the “I served” meme, as if his sorry record in uniform will save us all from the Evil Persian terrrists that threaten our right to go to Best Buy for the latest in plasma screen technology.

@Pedonator: Now I’m hearing that Bacardi DJ commercial in my head.
Speaking of DJs, where’s JNOV??

MF count up to 25
@LuxMentis: Hey baby, you found us! Did you know that Cynica sells old books too? Can we all move to Argentina and open our wine bar/antiquarian bookstore?

@redmanlaw: I’ve called them all ties, and then the polls call them all for the Dems. But yet, I’m calling this one a tie too.

@ mellbell – I was at the symphony until 930ish…luckily at the back for the main floor, so was was able to follow the liveblog and a twitter-feed (while listening to Mussorgsky, overall, rather pleasing…and it prevents me from ranting out loud).

(FCS — I’m keeping an open edit window for this, so I may have overwritten whatever you added. Shoot me an email, I’ll stick it in.)

“here’s what I DO know…” Niiice

Obama’s getting a little tired, I think. But he’s getting better now that he’s getting all pretty with the American Dream stuff.

“How does one know what one does not know?”

@nojo: Obama needs to rip this piece of shit’s arms off and beat him to death with the wet ends. He is letting the Psychogeezer and his toy go too easy. He needs to piss in Psychogeezer’s face and make him cry.

@SanFranLefty: Can I work there like that idiot-savant from Black Books?

Fuck ou Brokaw! You are a fucking piece of camel shit!

Wow, does anyone ever run for president who doesn’t have Daddy issues?

I think they succeeded in boring the shit outta everyone.

Barry scores at least a draw. This works well, I think.

@nojo: Exactly. Nothing less than a total meltdown from PG will change any minds. Luckily (? — I’m already looking up a good recipe for eating my words) Hopey is way ahead in the polls. Not that the polls mean anything, or that anyone pays any attention to them…

@SFL (and Cynica) – sounds good to me. Though I think I’m NZ bound (they want us, lots of degrees and “professional” background…clearly do not know us well ).

Any chance I can coax you (et al) up to Seattle this weekend??? .

“Get out of the way! I can’t see my script! Damn kids!”
Loser of this one: Brokaw.

@Pedonator: I’d rather be a high-functioning alcoholic than an average functioning teetotaler, thats for sure. I think its only possible to be a teetotaler if you are numb or dumb, and nothing gets to you. The fucking world is a place of tragedy, it surrounds and suffuses us all, talented people ruin their lives, evil fucktards become president and unleash wars that kill and maim hundreds of thousands, children die of starvation and disease, THERE IS NO JUSTICE, injustice and pain and tragedy are the norm, not the exception, and if you can face it every day, day after day, oblivious to it, you are more in denial than this high functioning drunk. I cannot drink enough to forget or ignore the pain and injustice, oh, sure, I can drink just enough not to just lie down and die of despair, but even that is a dangerous amount.

This debate changed nothing, and that means Psycho fuckwit continues his flailing epic fail. I am mildly interested in the post-mortem, but anyone who says anything other than “tie goes to the surging Obama” is fucked in the head.

The elephant in the living room was that the issue of McCain’s horrendous evil mudslinging shitstorm of a campaign was never mentioned, Obama should have brought it up, since Brokaw ignored it.

@LuxMentis: I don’t get to go, but I spent today preparing stuff for it.

@redmanlaw: I was hoping for FIREWORKS but I guess I’ll just have to settle for my hand.

What I miss? I swear — my kid didn’t have his phone on, so I had to wait (in the cold after a shitty train ride) 20 minutes for the bus that drops me many dark unsidewalked blocks from my home. When I did get home, I screamed at him for a good ten minutes, and now I’m playing catchup. Who let that Navy Chief yak? How do I get invited to one of these town halls? I’d be all like, “Back off, Tom — Sen. Obama didn’t finish answering my question. I’ll cut a bitch before I’ll let my question go unanswered. Bitch. Bro-caw. Bitch. I’ll cut you.”

@SanFranLefty: Ooh. Not sure what exactly I can contribute to that effort, but count me in nevertheless.

hmmnn seems they story might be the … “that one.” comment

@LuxMentis: Mr. SFL wants to go to NZ, but I prefer Argentina or Italy because the food is better. Re: Seattle – If I have to deal with TSA agents at SFO airport one more time this week, I will slit my wrists. I still have to deal with TSA like four more times in the next two weeks.

Tweety sez Psychogeezer is a chickenshit. For once, I like Tweety.

@Promnight: I’m an ex-binge turned daily drinker current teetotaler because the booze made me numb. And dumb.

Sully has been scathing in his final analysis. Overwrought, I think. But, for the record:

This was, I think, a mauling: a devastating and possibly electorally fatal debate for McCain. Even on Russia, he sounded a little out of it. I’ve watched a lot of debates and participated in many. I love debate and was trained as a boy in the British system to be a debater. I debated dozens of times at Oxofrd. All I can say is that, simply on terms of substance, clarity, empathy, style and authority, this has not just been an Obama victory. It has been a wipe-out.

As someone previously mentions Black Books, I offer Bernard’s observation: “So what? Who cares what the disgusting public thinks?!”

Best pundit quote..
I learned McCain wants to buy everyone a house and Obama wants everyone to have health care and we’re (the country) broke.

Classic.

@chicago bureau: Rachel’s take – PG came out swinging crazily, the Unicorn played a rope-a-dope and stayed cool. Pat Buchanan sez PG won because he looked at the Unicorn. Please, somebody mention “that one” out of PG’s mouth.

I missed the “that one” line that CNN faults PG with as a bad reference to Barry, anyone?

@JNOV: Not shit, baby.

So, starting the day off tomorrow with a big ranch breakfast at the Horsemen’s Haven, then off to the mountains with a tribal client trying to get a major cultural site back. Takin’ the fly rod coz it happens to be right at my “one hour to trout fishing” spot. I love the law. (Heh).

Sully is loving the Eagle. Buchanan just said he was presidential.

“That One” is already on the ewetubez.

@ SFL – so pleased I have to fly so infrequently now…will see you in SF in Feb. though…planning to take a week and build some bookscouting around the ABAA show… The Suz is with you…”the steaks are better in Argentina”

@ Cynica – If you can, for whom do you pack?!?

@lonbordin: Nope: “Bomb Iran” is the story, it seems. And “Not you, Tom.” McCain and his jokes. You know what Freud says about them.

On MSNBC Barry’s hanging out, shaking hands, signing autographs, you know, generally acting like he’s interested in and wants to connect with the people there, but no sign of PG. Did he really just bug out?

@lonbordin: and that was Castellamos, the resident Repug

Uh-oh. K-Lo over at the Corner had a stinger:

The Good News [Kathryn Jean Lopez]

I doubt too many people sat through this whole debate.

That can’t be good. Ramesh says:

It’s not the moderator’s fault that McCain is behind, and often weak, on domestic issues.

Clarity. For once.

We may be reading this too, erm, conservatively. Geezer may have lost this thing, running away. Let us see.

@LuxMentis: So I was thinking a few days back, hmmm, one of those Amazon shared-revenue links might be handy, and then I thought, shit, if Lux shows up I’m toast if I do that.

Welcome home! I’ll stick with t-shirts.

@Promnight: There is no justice, nor peace. I waver between utter despair, which requires nightly drunk-ons and follow-up hangovers which gently deflect the attempts of co-workers to engage me on political matters; and infrequent episodes of irrational exuberance, which require alcohol to bring me back down to earth and fall into a nightmare-less sleep so I can try the cycle again.

…talented people ruin their lives… Yeah, I always imagine I’m just like Jimi Hendrix, or something, it’s a good delusion even if I can’t play the gee-tar.

Food porn, real and imagined, often gets me through the weekends. (Love your new blog, btw, even though I’m 20+ years without meat, and I’m trying to convince myself to sample some before the trip to the Pampas.)

I don’t even need to hear the pundit response. My woodenboat pals, the nonpolitical ones, they tend to watch rather than listen, like most of america, and they were taken by McCain’s loser posture. One said “he seems to be afraid of Obama.” That from an aussie, totally uninvolved.

KOP, PA! Woot woot! Best mall in PA!

@chicago bureau: I read every debate conservatively, but if NRO is running away from it, I may not have to wait for the instapolls.

(re: MSNBC) A registered Democrat who voted Bush in 04? She….admits that? And allows herself to be photographed?

@nabisco: I too was surprised at the source.

Shit that CNN panel could get a shoe elected president and they are sitting on the sideline.

Any of you clowns watching CNN during this thing — what were the Processed Instant God meters reading?

Norah O’Donnell’s focus group of suburban Philadelphians (now we know where JNOV was!) who are ostensibly undecided shows that 9 of 12 said Unicorn won, 3 said PG won.

@lonbordin: And there’s that other signup I saw coming through! We’re not giving up until we’ve rescued everyone.

@chicago bureau: A wipeout for students of the rhetorical arts. For the 100s of millions of Americans, covered in shit, knee-deep in Keystone Light emtpies, the Psychogeezer blew Obama away.

@chicago bureau: Hah! Sully thinks this was a “debate”? Hah! “Oh, Mater, I think I shall go fly my aereoplane.”

HOW MUCH MORE FUCKING SPECIFIC DOES OBAMA HAVE TO GET?!? I truly don’t understand why McCain’s platitudes are accepted as “specifics.” Ugggh.

Like the marines… leave no one behind

@SanFranLefty: economy favors Argentina, lotsa land and wine as good as anywhere. Plus, top shelf soccer AND basketball!

@chicago bureau: MSNBC had their own PIG meters, and showed much more positive reactions for Obama, and negative ones for PG, esp from republicans when he mentioned buying up bad mortgages.

@NoJo – Jeff and The Suz went to college together and remain close…I’ve no problem at all with amazon. I say go for that which fills the coffers (hell, I might have some suggestions for inclusion). [while we are old paper folk, we are both also bleeding edge tech geeks…it is a strange combo]

@ Cynica – Very cool. I know them in passing but will make a point of introducing myself this weekend.

@Pedonator: Pedo, I didn’t eat red meat for 15 years before going to the pampas, Mr. SFL suggested I needed to try to prepare for the trip and eat a couple slices off of a Nieman Ranch tenderloin to prep, I got to B.A. and started eating slices off of his plate, and by the last week in Argentina I was ordering my own grass-fed steaks. Have never regretted it. That is the way beef was meant to be eaten, in the non-corn-fed ways that make you puke after reading The Omnivore’s Dilemma.

I believe in Clean Coal, the Tooth Fairy and 6.5 hours sleep.

Sweet Dreams!

FlyingChainSaw: YOU KEEP MY FRESHMAN DORM OUT OF THIS.

Ewalda: Classic. “Oh! An… hoop.” Win.

“McCain’s smile has a kind of menacing quality” Oh, Tweetz. Hee hee.

@chicago bureau: Geez was seriously in danger of catching his tailhook on the phonelines, just like in Spain.

@SanFranLefty: Oh how I wish! King of Prussia is near the Main Line, the uber wealthy Philly suburb, but it’s also near some blue collar burbs. The Main Line is pretty blue (that’s where Haverford and Bryn Mawr colleges are), but the rest of the Philly burbs (with the exception of Swarthmore, another college town) are kind of purple leaning red. But this evening someone told me that PG is pulling out of PA. Is that true?

Keef O. leads with “THAT ONE” – I heart you Keith!

Ahaaaa….KO’s going after the “that one” thing. Okay, here we go.

Not “that guy.” Not “that senator.” That ONE? That one what?

@SanFranLefty: @Mistress Cynica: @BRB: You guys are totally on the same wavelength tonight.

@nabisco: Don’t forget the hot boys.

@JNOV: PG referred to Obama as “that one” when saying how O voted on something. Unreal. Next debate: the N word.

Keith leads in with “that one.” But the “suspend the campaign” thing that was just recalled demonstrated a certain tone-deafness on the Geezer.

@chicago bureau: I’m one of those clowns, and left my charts at the nursing station.

@SanFranLefty: I’m with you, I missed out on all the braseola on the Italy trip last year, but I’ve always been holding out for bacon. Yes, bacon is the only meat I miss, I truly crave those peanut-butter-and-bacon sandwiches we used to make in the trailer park when Mom, a social worker at the time, was out trying to better herself through night classes in Law.

Any meat I eat, at least that’s dead, will have to be grass-fed.

@Pedonator: Oh, you’d have liked tonight’s side dish, I can make vegetarians happy. It was a variation on the Italian dish, sauteed brocolirabe (spelling). First, I took an acorn squash, it was a big one, and I sliced some hamburger-like slices from it, from the top end where its solid squash all the way through, half inch thick slices of squash, then I microwaved them until they were cooked, but still firm. Then I seasoned these squash patties with black pepper and adobo and cumin powder, then seared them in a pan with olive oil till they browned, took them out and set them aside. Added a little more olive oil to the pan, and some nice toasted sesame oil, and then sauteed some thin sliced garlic, then added whole stalks of brocolirabe, when they wilted a bit, I added cannelini beans, large white beans, and scallions, and a huge handful of spring-mix salad greens. Just a hint of cayenne, some ground cumin, a little water, lemon juice, then at the end, when cooking is done, some more sliced scallions, so some of the scallions are nicely seared and cooked, and some are fresh and bright. To serve, I put the brocolirabe, cannelini, and seared greens on the plate, then sprinkled some grated parmesan on the top of the squash “patties,”, quickly browned that, then laid the squash patties on the greens. It was a side dish for my dish, but as I was making it, I knew it could be the whole deal for a vegetarian. Did I mention the toasted sesame oil, and the hint of cumin?

I’d be curious about the Fox News take on all of this. But, then again, I just ate.

@lonbordin: That’s just what I say to everyone I encounter who professes a belief in this “God” person. Leads to awkward social situations, but I’m used to that now.

Michelle was revealing DECOLLETAGE I notice when she was walking around flashing people after the debate. If only Elizabeth Kucinich were to appear and start eating Michelle’s face, I know he could start converting the GOP base to the Obama camp.

That’s my analysis.

@JNOV: PG at least grimaced in the direction of the Unicorn this time, after his handlers told him that he had to at least look at Obama. But he said “that one” with his flipper waving over at the Unicorn with a glare, which was almost worse.

I agree with Mistress Cynica – I expect the n-word bomb to come out of PG or Caribou Bunny in the next week.

@nojo: You had asked about the MSNBC ad plug-in, and, while I may be in the majority here, sneaking a peek at CP tonight reminded me that I sorta like it. At the very least, it’s an easy way to keep up with Keith O.

@SanFranLefty: And the n-word just might get them some votes.

@SanFranLefty: Did you hear about the “Sambo beat the bitch” comment out of Talibunny?

@JNOV: They’re scheduled to hit PA tomorrow. Palin will hit both the burgh and Johnstown, at one of which I predict a hockey rink photo op.

@Promnight: Separated at birth? I’ve been on a total kick lately of Some Kinda Squash + Some Kinda Beans + Some Kinda Greens. Guess it’s not that unusual, but your particular preparation sounds great. Hope you trickle down some side-dishes for us veggies on your new food porn blog, I’ve already bookmarked it and plan to check regularly. Also, do you like sumac? A good yellow-orangish squash with a light splash of great olive oil and a sprinkle of sumac is a beautiful thing.

UPDATE: Polls is polls, so there can be some disputin’. But this is NOT GOOD NEWS for the Geezerplex:

Thirty-nine percent of the 400 uncommitted voters surveyed identified Barack Obama as tonight’s winner; 27 percent said John McCain won, while 35 percent saw the debate as a draw.

Of course, however, undecided voters are totally in the bag.

Oh shit, Keef just stole my thunder. But I love that man, so I will give him a pass.

Maddow is so cool. She’s right about the Freddy/Fannie answer to that black dude, Whatshisname.

OMG, Rachel busts McCain on saying to the young black guy “I guess you don’t know who Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac are” after forgetting the guy’s name. Lurve K.O. saying “He was wandering around like a man who is not well.”

@Promnight: Yum.

@Pedonator: And pedo, one of my specialties is risotto, so many many good things to be done with that with no meat at all. And Ratatouille is a cousine in itself, not to mention that eggplant can be used as a meat substitute in so many dishes. And beans, look at my blog, there are beans in everything, many of my recipes, just omit the meat, your cool.

Spahgetti with meat sauce, but its not meat sauce, its bulgar wheat, I can do that too, and make a lasagna. Is cheese ok? Eggs, fish? Thai stir fries with eggplant instead of meat, curries, I make many different curries, all can omit the meat, my favorite meat substitute is probably lentils, they are the best thing on earth. You’ve got me going, I am going to do a vegetarian post soon.

@JNOV: I’m feeling homesick for the Main Line. Or at least Wawa. What’s Jr.’s favorite Wawa snackage? I’m partial to the chicken noodle soup.

@SanFranLefty: I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO GET OUT OF MY HEAD?!

When am I gonna get to buy you a drink, SFL?

@nabisco: Maybe there will be another flood while she’s there.

@mellbell: Tastykake Butterscotch Krimpets, he says!

NO, KO, we did not just buy out any mortgages. Unless you consider helping the Masters of teh Universe pay off their Hamptons estates “buying off mortgages”. Geezer’s plan, announced tonight, way out-socialisms the Unicorn, and it’s safe for him to say because it will never see the light of day.

@Promnight: Ooooh, risotto. A friend of mine is proposing a Halloween potluck feast of all black foods and I want to make a squid ink risotto for it. Thoughts?

@JNOV: You been reading about Talibunny’s rallies? They have turned into Klan rallies, no lie, the crowd threatening the press, crying out “kill him” when she talks about Obama, another crowd calling out “terrorist.” I am convinced, by the way, that the pigfuckers think Ayers is black. She has been wearing all white, everything but the hood. One account, said a black network news sound person was accosted by someone who yelled “Nigger, sit down, Boy.” The news account didn’t say “nigger,” it said “racial epithet,” but, please, we are not children.

So one of my top favorite songs of all times is the song “Once in a Lifetime” by Talking Heads, as oddly enough it has given me some cynical power to shove through some challenging moments in my life. I hear the song on the radio and I smile through tears. This is apparently the theme song for the new Oliver Stone movie “W.” and I don’t know what to think about that. Should I engage in a Pavlovian response and go see the movie, or should this ruin the song for me?

Jr. keeps harping on PG not being well b/c he got too close to the core on the nucular subs.

I expect things to remain true to form in the Geezer campaign: He concentrates on sweeping up every fence-sitting middle-class racist left, and Lipstick Beast goes after the knuckle-dragging toothless meth-head vote. If anyone drops the N-bomb, it will be her. I’m also waiting for her to start doing that tongue-pushing-cheek pretend blowjob thing at every campaign stop.

All in all: I’m good with this outcome. But, then, of course, I’m in the tank, so believe nothing that I say. With that, good night and sleep tight, my fellow bitches.

@Promnight: CAN SOMEONE GROW SOME FUCKING BALLS AND START SCREAMING ABOUT THIS SHIT OCCURRING? FROM THE ROOFTOPS? PLEASE?

@JNOV: Haha. I’m more of a Hostess girl myself.

@BRB: I’d only do it if I could get really really fresh squid.

Oh, wait a second: the RNC (per KO) complaining about the Town Hall format. That tops everything.

OK, now I’m shutting it down.

@Promnight: Yeah, been following and the Psychogeezer’s neo-Nazi past. The message they are trying to send is that she is a white supremist that knows how to shoot. From helicopters.

Operation Ghetto Storm With Tits!

@Promnight: Hey big guy, get a hold on yourself! No need to go all tree-hugger on me, though I do love the attention. But yeah, I eat all that other stuff. Thing is, almost every cuisine has way more traditional vegetarian delights in it, because the big meat-fest of the modern era is a recent thing and except for the mythical “hunters” who frolicked in ages past, pushing entire herds of buffalo off cliffs, most people since we grew legs and crawled up to the land have lived mostly off of chlorophyll. And with that I’m reaching the edge of my chloherence. Perhaps I need to forage for some protein now.

@FlyingChainSaw: Did you hear about the “Sambo beat the bitch” comment out of Talibunny?

Uh, no. Enlighten me. I have one glass of wine left.

Oh, and final tally of “My friends” out of McCunt’s mouth – 33.

@BRB: Unicorn inauguration, you can buy me all the drinks you want. Or get your ass out to Cali, babe! Rptrcub can attest to my faghag credentials – I can direct you to the best spots in SF.

@mellbell: They make these nasty breaded chicken sandwiches with marinara now. He loves them. I told him his aorta has a stick of butter wedged in it.

@chicago bureau: But now it’s getting good. Can you just imagine the scramble going on behind the scenes to write this off? The Socialization of Real Estate is going down real well among the neocons…

@BRB: Maybe toss some black beans in there at the end for a Carib take on risotto? And garnish with wee wedges of Clementine and/or plantains.

Any explanation from the Geezer camp about why he kept wandering to the back of the stage to the curtain during the proceedings, and why he slinked off immediately afterwards? Was his ancient bladder full? If so, it wasn’t with piss-and-vinegar, like his old man and hgis old man’s old man. His just fills with bile.

Just as an aside: McCain’s grandpa was the real deal, in the best Navy tradition.

@FlyingChainSaw: I have totally believed that ever since I first heard it.

@Pedonator: You know everything. I was thinking of red peppers (like the ones in arabiatta) for piquancy. And some shellfish?

@Ewalda: I was wondering what PG was doing back there – waiting for someone to hand him a shiv? Your theory that his prostate is enlarged makes more logical sense.
@FlyingChainSaw: Okay, Talibunny will utter the n-word within 3 days. Friday night dump before a 3 day weekend.

Keiff Oh and my lesbian crush Rachel now pointing out that McCunt booked out of town immediately after the debate.

I want y’alls input. I am near to kicking the high-paying nonprofit legal affairs job for a career in food. Not a restaurant, I worked in restaurants for 15 years, so did most of my family, huge investment, huge risk, life-devouring. No, a deli, but not like an american deli, like a french deli, lots of prepared foods for sale to take home and microwave, lots of things, all fresh and made on premises, starting with salsas, hummus, baba ganoush, dips (white bean, the usual sour cream crudite dip, aoili, etc.). 3 or 4 soups a day. Salads, Tabouleh, Israeli couscous with black olives, fettah, green peppers, scallions, lemon juice, lentil salad, one of the greatest things on earth. And then prepared main dishes, ribs, of course, but better than anyone else, lamb shanks, meatloaf (you need to have the traditional comfort foods) a good vegetarian lasagna, coque au vin, braised short ribs, not the usual though, maybe my meditreanean mole, I am not letting that recipe out, the possibilities here are many, and prepared side dishes, the brocolirabe rescipe I gave away above, roasted potatoes, and yes, the risottos, they actually are very good reheated in the microwave, again, there are a dozen original recipes for that I could do. Fresh pasta, I have made it with my big kitchenaid, the markup is stupid crazy. Sauces, sure, vodka sauce and the usual pasta sauces, but also some different stuff.

The name of the place: Mise en place. Subtitle: Cater yourself.

Not a normal deli, eitther, there will be a coffeshop, couches, and bookshelves lined with cookbooks. Hang out, let me put a meal together for you.

Am I insane? This place would be located in a highly seasonal, very very upscale, richy rich rch summer vacation resort, part of the reason I love the idea is it would be a 6-month business, I know, you have to earn all your money in six months, but the rest of the year, hey, see ya, I’ll be on the beach.

I is serious, I want input, would you guys patronize my establishment, if it was near you?

nojo: Imagine? I don’t need to. You remember Ann Althouse from a post earlier this week? There was consideration of the possibility of Black Eagle packing an earpiece in a post-debate thread. Seriously.

And there are some on the Corner who are calling this a total disaster. This guy, for example. He thinks that not hammering on Bill Ayers was a complete fuck-up on Geezer’s part.

Redstate calls it a draw. Same on the blog over at (good God) Town Hall. That’s a fucking clue on how this is going down among people who want Black Eagle to lose.

So basically the hard-core conservatives are pissed off as all hell. The game may be down to an all-out attack on Rezko/Ayers/NAH NAH NAH at Bob Schieffer’s Prime Time House Party next week…. and it’s going to have a Hail Mary, total desperation character to it.

Thus, I can sleep the sleep of a contented librul tonight.

@Promnight: Prommy, I’d love to have your place in my neighborhood. Will it work in the location you’ve chosen? Beats my ass.

@Promnight: Prommie, (have you changed names and avatars?) I would totally support such a place in my neck of the woods. I couldn’t afford to shop at such a place, but I’d be happy to work there 6 months of the year, if you provided your employees with a livable wage and health insurance. Location, that’s the toughy. Because you want fresh seasonal ingredients, to the extent possible, so that nixes winter resort places like Sun Valley, Aspen, or Tahoe. And you still want a location where the people aren’t total douches, so that gets rid of East Hampton. So what’s left? Good climate, not filled with total douchebags despite richy-riches running around, good vibes for regular folks, near major interstate highways so that fresh produce can get there quickly, big pool of relatively cheap labor…..

(Drum roll…..)

Santa Fe.

RML, please help Prommy with his Articles of Incorporation.

/you’re welcome.

@Promnight: That is exactly the kinda thing I and Mr. Pedo have been fantasizing about for years. Our neighborhood has plentiful restaurants, 80% “Mexican” (not anything like you would ever get in Mexico, but…), we’ve got a decent Greek place (again, though, never saw falafel when we were in Greece — perhaps they’re really Lebanese and worried about possible anti-Arab sentiment?).

I picture a neighborhood grocery, with lots of little yuppie staples and a giant expanse of beautiful deli-style prepared foods, but like the kind of deli you find in the Testaccio neighborhood of Rome, stuff you actually crave and want to eat, and the attendants take their time with you and entice you, give you tastes, until you walk out of there with incredible delicacies that you never before knew existed.

Summing up, GO FOR IT!

@Promnight: Oh, and P.S. How can I get a “high-paying, nonprofit, legal affairs job”? I thought those were all contradictory to one another.

Well, its a school night for me, and I am damn glad I have a prescription for methamphetamine-type stimulants on account of my add, or tomorrow would be hard. No question, tonight does not change the tide, and the tide is totally in favor of Obama. Geezer is looking schizophrenic, the total attack dog on the trail, mr. diplomacy in debate, looks like he is willing to talk dirt behind Obamas back but wusses out when face to face.

I love you fuckers, you know that? Here’s my drunken post overshare part of the evening, I could not get through this fucking election without you all, its the future of the world at stake, and I cannot get drunk enought to forget that for a second.

Election night, I need a poll response on this, and this is not drunken shit-talk, I need to know, how many NY, NJ, PA folks out there would come if I was to throw an election night party? The deal is, I need a critical mass of people to do this. I am out of the way, an hour from everywhere, so I assume I will be putting everyone up for the night. I have room for a lot, I have three free bedrooms and the living room and the boat, so thats a lot of room, if people take sleeping bags.

I am serious, I will host this, can you at all tell that the greatest pleasure in my life is entertaining? But I need 6 or 8, can we get that? I need some serious commitments before I put this all in motion, I want to meet you people, this is the invite. Please let me know, if there are enough people interested, its on. Respond to palau998@aol.com, yeah, I know, an aol email, loser me, but I will feed you good, so let me know if you are up for it, and I will make it happen, all I need is the critical mass.

@SanFranLefty: Ya gotta be willing to work for an industry, business, association, you know, the enemy.

@Promnight: Good night, Jon-boy. Sweet dreams with visions of our favorite comedian Sarah Silverman. I’ll be in either Reno or SF come election night, but I am going to DC if there is a Unicorn inauguration. I have to see that with my own flippin eyes to believe it. I saw Bill’s inaugurations but I think the Unicorn’s will take it to 11 for me in terms of being verklempt.

Fuckit. I’m gonna drag my out-of-work old ass to bed. ‘night, Elizabeth.

@SanFranLefty: @Pedonator:
My location would be right here, LBI, think the Hamptons, big money, very seasonal. I would expect major catering opportunties to follow very quickly.

Yes, Pedo, you got it exactly, there would be trays of samples out there showing what you do with this dip, with this sauce, plates set up with a suggested meal. The marketing plan includes going to all the high end salons and spas, with a tray of hors de ouvres, saying “just leave this on your reception desk, with this display of cards.”

I am going to bed, thank you all for holding my hand through the debate, I really have major angst over this election, and as I said, I would be having a much harder time without your company. I have never felt so much among people who share my values and intellect and vices, most of all the vices, than I have among you all. Please, anyone anyone near my neck of the woods, if you agree to come to my place, I will make the best election night party ever, we will eat and drink like kings and queens with the least possible environmental impact, and it will be a victory party, knock wood.

@Promnight: I had this strange gut feeling Sunday morning — after the Ayers attacks were launched — that all would be well. I posted a comment about it at the time, because it’s much too early to be getting confident, and I wanted to publicly scold myself.

Events quickly caught up with my gut call, but I still can’t tell you what brought it to mind. Just that over the years, I’ve learned how to listen to my gut.

Point being: Spare the angst. I think it’s now clear that demagoguery won’t work this time, at least among a sufficient majority of voters. We’re now down to a very practical concern: Making sure everyone who wants to vote has the opportunity. The Republicans can’t win, but they’re trying very hard to steal, and they’re the modern experts at it.

I renew my call for U.N. observers. I want to see blue helmets at every precinct.

@Promnight: I love you fuckers, you know that?

I was prepping an “I have got to meet you assholes” comment, but yours suffices.

@nojo: Is it too late to organize a peeple’s petition to ask the UN to station UN blue helmets in Sandy Eggo? I think they’d be very popular in, say, the Fruit Loop area. I know I’d go walk the dog down there to thank them in person.

@Promnight: Conflicts with Metallica in Denver, not that I have tickets, but it’s fun to think about James Hetfield screaming “Barackkkk Obaaaammmmaaaa” before going into “Creeping Death.” Thanks for the invite, though.

I didn’t do shit in this election except throw money at tha Eagle and follow the coverage in non-conventional sources (like this one). I won’t know anyone if I go out Election Night. Will I be walking the precinct this weekend? Nah. Tiling the floor in the office here. Could turn out to have been a big missed opportunity, but sometimes you have to focus closer.

@mellbell: Yeah, I need to reapply for that MSNBC ad in a day or two — they didn’t want to approve until after the site launched.

Besides, I’m getting tired of all the Google matching ads on either side…

Man. This is what I get for having other shit to do on a Tuesday night.

LuxMentis: I will, alas, not be able to join you at the book fair. My show got pushed back a week, so this weekend, I will be NECK DEEP IN THEATER! (Include reverb here, if you will.) I’ll be lucky to have a half-hour to crawl out and get some food at some point each day.

Promnight: Your business idea sounds lovely, and practical. Unfortunately, being the person I am, I either wouldn’t shop there at all, or would shop there only on rare, rare occasion. Mostly because my nutritional needs are met through much simpler, cheaper foods — it seems like a lot of the time, food is just fuel to me. Only when I’m not going crazy on other stuff do I have time to revel in food.

Everyone: you guys are beautiful. Watching the BS so I don’t have to…

@nojo:
@Pedonator:

The guys wearing the blue helmets typically don’t do civil affairs duty, but the election observers do get nifty armbands, vests and sometimes even plastic ponchos and ball caps. I’ve got a trunkload of this stuff at home, maybe I’ll drag it all out and wear it on election day, see if someone tries to stop me at my polling place. If nothing else I’ve decided what my h’ween costume will be this year.

On a ‘srsly’ note, I do have a Spanish friend that has been an election observer in far flung places like Haiti, Mozambique, and Tanzania. She just pinged me that she’ll be arriving in the US within the week to….monitor our elections!

Add a Comment
Please log in to post a comment