Additional Outtakes
GEORGE: I quit!
PAUL: You can’t quit, you’re fired!
GEORGE: You can’t fire me, I quit!
JOHN: I might quit, too.
RINGO: I’m just waiting to be replaced by Pete Best.
• • •
[ The lads jam to “Happy Wanderer”. ]
• • •
RINGO: I have a new song!
JOHN: Let’s hear it!
RINGO: [ sings at piano ]
I’d like to be
Up in a tree
In a jungle bungalow
With the apes.
PAUL: I have a few suggestions.
• • •
[ The lads jam to “Mack the Knife”. ]
• • •
YOKO: [ primal scream ]
JOHN: You should hear her in bed, mate.
PAUL: She’s faking it, you know.
JOHN: No.
• • •
PAUL: I need a name that rhymes with orange.
• • •
MICHAEL LINDSAY-HOGG: I’m Michael Lindsay-Hogg.
JOHN: You’re kidding, right?
MICHAEL LINDSAY-HOGG: No, really. That’s my name. Michael Lindsay-Hogg.
RINGO: I’ll bet that was fun at school.
MICHAEL LINDSAY-HOGG: I went to Choate.
GEORGE: You’re Michael Lindsay-Hogg, and you went to Choate.
MICHAEL LINDSAY-HOGG: Is there a problem with this?
GLYN JOHNS: Lay off him, lads.
• • •
[ The lads jam to “The Monkees”. ]
• • •
RINGO: In fifty years, two of you will be dead, Mick and Keith will still be alive, and millions of people will be watching us waste rehearsal time on a Walt Disney channel.
GEORGE: What?
RINGO: Sorry, I was tripping with Sellers last night.
I guess we can stop blaming Yoko for blowing up the Ruttles?
There goes Roe
Oh! Run, Stacey! RUN! she’s getting allll my pennies!
BURR DEMING • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 Thank you for this, nojo. He was a wonderful talent and, by all accounts, a wonderful human…
NOJO • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 Oh, and there’s a Catholic church across the street. Maybe I can do a little dance for them!
NOJO • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 Now that I’m in NYC, plenty of pigeons to poison in his honor.
NOJO • All the Vice President's Men 2025 update: Nothing happened. And here we are!
MANCHUCANDIDATE • Weeping Angel Imagine going from hope to Fascism in less than two decades enabled by greedy ass (millionaire)…
NOJO • Nightmare at the Museum From the last time he threatened to bomb Iran, 2020. Remember that one? All a misty blur now.
NOJO • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! @ManchuCandidate: I have birthright citizenship in Cascadia, so I think I’m good.
MANCHUCANDIDATE • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! @nojo: Only the sane parts... like the West coast, New England (minus the Bruins and…
NOJO • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! @ManchuCandidate: So, can you guys annex us now?
MANCHUCANDIDATE • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! PP is done. 51st state, my ass.