Dick Morris Wishes You and Yours a Very Merry Christmas from the Alternate Universe

You know who survived politically? Clinton.

I didn’t realize sucking toes led to Alzheimers.

@ManchuCandidate: He hangs out at disease-ridden crack houses to engage discount hookers. They get these weird infections on their feet that open wounds that are the perfect growth media for toxic amoebae. After years of foot licking crack addicts these brain-eating amoebae invade and fester in his brain and eat enough of it adversely effect his judgment.

We need to come up with a Stinque style guide. For example, the words “Dick Morris” should never appear without the words “toe-sucker” or “shrimp-boy-extraordinaire” immediately preceding or following them, as in:

Toe-sucker Dick Morris thinks…

Or

Dick Morris, shrimp-boy extraordinaire, appeared…

I’m sure you can think of other additions to the guide, such as the use of the word “Pencil Dick” when referring to Eric Cantor…

@Tommmcatt Be Fat, And That Be That: It’s so rare that I bother to deal with him, I’ll probably forget toe-sucking next time. It’s not like, say, short-fingered vulgarian, which is enshrined in history.

@Tommmcatt Be Fat, And That Be That:

We can’t forget “Great Pumpkin” John Boehner.

@Walking Still: Indeed.

But I always thought that drunken, slobbering fucker was the exact same shade of orange as Tang. (And just as artificial…)