#NotIntendedToBeFactual
GOP Senator Jon Kyl of Arizona claimed last week that abortion is “well over 90% of what Planned Parenthood does.”
The actual number is less than 3%.
Details, details. Okay, fine, so it’s the usual right-wing strategy of “the sky is green, war is peace, why do you hate America” approach to discourse; namely, repeat a lie often enough and it becomes true. Yawn. Move on.
Unless you’re Kyl’s spokesperson and explain it with a true yet colossally idiotic comment to reporters: that the 90% figure “was not intended to be a factual statement.”
Stephen Colbert has now launched the Twitter meme featuring Jon Kyl and the hashtag #notintendedtobefactual:
Once a year, Jon Kyl retreats to the Arizona desert and deposits 2 million egg sacs under the sand.
Citing religious reasons, Jon Kyl refuses to utter the number 8.
Jon Kyl once ate a badger he hit with his car.
Carly Simon wrote that song about Jon Kyl.
Legally, Jon Kyl cannot be within 100 yards of Helen Mirren.
Jon Kyl has a shrine to Scooter from the Muppet Show.
You get the idea. If you have a Twitter account, go for it. Otherwise, feel free to go nuts here in the comments.
[CNN]
[#notintendedtobefactual]
Jon Kyl is an alien can probe people anally with his tongue.
John Kyle considered going into the priesthood because he likes to diddle little boys but decided to be a senator because the pay is better.
the fertile soil in which Kyle grows:
People Think Head Scars Prove Obama’s Had Brain Surgery
He has been plagued with questions and doubts concerning his background throughout his first term as President.
Questions like – is Barack Obama actually American? Is he a Muslim? Is he actually an alien from another planet? – have frequently been asked.
(ftr people also think Fox nation is a bunch of inbred morans)
Jon Kyl is the warmest smartest wisest sanest human being ever and he’d make the most awesome preznit.
Okay, this is a great one from Colbert:
Jon Kyl is the only person who can sneeze with his penis. He calls it a “sneenis.” #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
John Kyl does not have a crotch like a Ken Doll.
we were talking about this guy before. the former governor of NM:
Governor Gary Johnson Set to Make Major Announcement in New Hampshire
Jon Kyl is illegal in 4 Canadian provinces.
Jon Kyl has had a torrid love affair with Sheriff Joe Arpaio for 14 years.
Jon Kyl is the secret love child of Charles Manson and Margret Thatcher.
gotta say. I like Barrys speech so far.
@Capt Howdy: Wait, did you forget a #notintendedtobefactual there?
@Nabisco:
no
actually I am completely serious. it actually sounded like a democrat.
what happens now, well thats another story.
@Capt Howdy: He also sounded like one in 2008. I’ll wait for the sellout.
@nojo: Come for the Hope ™, stay for the Sellout.
@nojo:
heh
the sellout could come but it was not in this speech.
@Capt Howdy: If nothing else, congratulations to whoever floated the expectation-lowering Simpson-Bowles rumor yesterday. Well-played.
@Capt Howdy: I want to watch/read it, but reading this on Sully’s liveblog gives me Hope:
2.17 pm. Are you for children with Down Syndrome … or tax cuts for the increasingly wealthy? Then he describes himself as one of the rich, and compares his new tax break with 33 seniors having to find $6,000 each to fund their healthcare. Then a hard-hitting claim that the Ryan plan isn’t “serious or courageous.”
@FlyingChainSaw: You! Chainsaw!
@Capt Howdy: Well, Rachel’s almost pornographic with joy. Guess I’ll have to read it.
@FlyingChainSaw: We’ve missed you! How is the Prime Minister of Indonesia doing?
@SanFranLefty: It’s been nuts. I’ll find out later this month.
This Twitter hashtag thread is a real hit. It’s getting dozens of contributions a second. Here’s one of mine:
McCain_2008
#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement Jon Kyl will lick shit off the fingers of anyone who fists him in a burning church while he prays to satan
NOJO • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 @JNOV: Does blockquote no longer work?Huh. Guess not.
JNOV • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 Oh shit. “ Cuban state media reported that 32 Cubans were killed in the U.S. attacks in…
JNOV • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 So…. Does blockquote no longer work? Am I 2026’s only loser? (see blurb)
JNOV • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 Welp Speaking to reporters on Air Force One, President Trump said that “Cuba looks like it is…
JNOV • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 My mood courtesy of Rhiannon Giddens: https://youtu.be/M7PvWw97Cq0
JNOV • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 A man who has his family and lackeys deeply embedded in every facet of our government is trying to…
JNOV • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 THIS IS NOT OKAY! WE’VE RUN THESE WAR GAMES FOR **YEARS**. SPOILER ALERT: A TON OF PEOPLE DIE.…
JNOV • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK! WHAT. THE FUCK?!!?!
NOJO • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 @ManchuCandidate: Summer definitely disappeared.
MANCHUCANDIDATE • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 BTW, has your favorite fundies gone to Ratpure?