We Get Mail

And why didn’t I think of this?

@blogenfreude:
I’m getting a headache from trying to unravel the Gordian knot of lojik.

@blogenfreude: The Saved will still need Rapture house sitters and gardeners. Let them pre-pay for perpetual care.

@blogenfreude: That is totally awesome, and opens up an entirely new business model – which FCS has already glommed on to. What about grief counseling for the left behind? Emergency Services for all the crashes that will happen from driver-less buses and cars? Partners abandoned in mid-coitus? There’s a lot of need out there only the Professionals can plan for…

@The Nabisco Quiver: Post-Rapture Pet Psychiatry – are you ready for the boom time in this greenfield opportunity?

@The Nabisco Quiver: I’m thinking a porn-buddy rapture service – when the faithful get raptured, they’re not going to want their loved ones finding the girl-on-horse videos and kiddie porn they’ve got stashed.

@blogenfreude: Genius!

@blogenfreude: So you’re saying that dogs and cats don’t get Rapturized? Cats, I can see that, they can be devilish. But, my loyal dog Sophie? Won’t be with Jesus?

@Dodgerblue: No, these idiots are so stupid that they think animals don’t have “souls.” They will be seriously surprised when they stand before Bastet to be judged.

This is my favorite part:

If subscriber loses his/her faith and/or the Rapture occurs and subscriber is not Raptured (aka is “left behind”) EE-BP disclaims any liability; no refund will be tendered.

A thousand years of tribulation and no refund, suckas!

@Mistress Cynica: I know many, many animals with much more viable souls than these Xians (my preferred term for the Christians sans Christ).