Burn, Baby, Burn

Honestly, we were joking when we called Bobby Jindal a child abuser. Well, no we weren’t. But we were speaking metaphorically. We weren’t accusing Our Favorite Exorcist of physically harming children.

Not like this guy.

Meet John Freshwater, a good Christian who teaches science in Mount Vernon, Ohio. His competencies include promoting Creationism, questioning carbon-dating, and damning homosexuals.

Oh, and burning crosses into the flesh of students.

He brands them scientifically, of course, using a gizmo called a “high frequency generator” to carve what he considers a highly stylized “X” — one line just happens to be significantly longer than the other. The wounds heal in a mere three or four weeks, after which the kids are free to forsake our savior and burn in hell.

But he’s a great guy, really. Just ask his friend Dave Daubenmire:

“With the exception of the cross-burning episode… I believe John Freshwater is teaching the values of the parents in the Mount Vernon school district,” he told The Columbus Dispatch for a story published Friday.

Well, yes, of course. Teaching values is what science is all about.

Ohio board votes to ax teacher accused of branding [AP]