From the Horse’s Mouth

“I’d ask the fathers and husbands of America to consider our privacy when one summer day I found this guy on the deck of the rental property, just 18 feet away next door to us, staring like a creep at my wife while she mowed the lawn in her shorts…”

-Todd Palin, in a statement released to the press regarding author Joe McGinniss’ new book on Sarah Palin.


Which leads us to wonder… what, exactly, was “First Dude” Todd Palin doing while his wife was out mowing the lawn in hotpants? Please vote on what you consider the most likely scenario:

A) Staring at her through a peephole gouged in the wall with a mechanical pencil over a period of three days?
B) Keeping an eye on goddamn Trig, who just crapped his diapers again and Sarah just doesn’t have fucking time for his shit right now.
C) Watching “Red Shoe Diaries” on Skinemax while nursing a beer and smoking a joint.
D) Why, the dishes, of course


Sport report: Lefty’s Tri-tips 28, UCLA 10 at the half.

@SanFranLefty: 49 – 20. Even some of the Texas fans were leavinf early.

@Dodgerblue: And we’re ten minutes away from kick off of Tree v. Immigrant-Haters (Arizona). Unclear given the time difference if CB or JNOV will be up for it.

Mmmm, tri-tip. I love the tri-tip.

I know none of the rest of you saw New Mexico v. Texas Tech, or the War of the RMLs, but holy fucking hell, it was like the worst televised game in the history of humankind. Lo-blows were 20 point underdogs and lost by 46 for a final score of 59-13. It was clear despite the tight camera work that nobody was at the game (stadium was 20 percent full, max), two horrendously long weather delays and a team (mine) that had no business being on the field. UNM is too poor to buy out the coach’s contract, so we’re stuck with him for another year or two. Dude blasted his players’ execution tonight, but they’re all his recruits. 0-3. It’s gonna be a long season.

@redmanlaw: Volunteer to be the team sniper. Get some practice in and help out the alma mater at the same time. Win-win.

@FlyingChainSaw: The coach is about the size of a normal human + a beer keg. Wouldn’t be sporting.

I am not comfortable with a 6 point margin between The Tree and AZ in the 3rd.

ADD: Oh Phew. Luck just threw for another TD, then The Tree got an extra point. Tree 23, Brown-People-Haters 10 with 5 minutes left in the 3rd.

@redmanlaw: No, you’ll be hunting down key players on the other team. You can probably make a side business wagering on the games’ outcomes but I dunno how long it will take the bookies and betting public to notice that key turning points to UNM games always seem to come after an inexplicable burst of sniper fire in UNMs favor.

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