Oh well … Cards could have won with a break or two, but teh Football Gods sez no.

five yards, please.

I was going for a picture of a cheerleader to put in here, and it struck me: have I ever seen a Steeler cheerleader?  Visit to the official website, Yahoo image search engine?  Nothing.

I’m sold.  On account of the lack of cheerleaders, the pick is Pittsburgh to beat the spread.  It’s a 10,000 STAR LOCK.

Liveish commentary follows.  Your contributions will be (a) inevitably better than mine, and (b) therefore welcome.

1755 (ET): One deep, trauma-inducing emotion, expressed off-hand earlier today: five-hour pregame shows which are half-filled with self-promotional free advertising for your corporate master (Universal, News Corp., Disney, Viacom) MAKES BABY JESUS CRY.  For Pete’s sake — keep it to two hours and talk about football only or GTFO.

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I know you’re just dying to know what’s causing me to melt down this week, so without further ado:

1. Karaoke – it has never been a passion of mine to hear bad music sung by people with less talent than the untalented original artist. Cf. Billy Joel. But now it’s getting silly:

In August 2007, a Seattle man was assaulted onstage during a karaoke rendition of Coldplay’s “Yellow,” while last December, a San Diego man encored his karaoke set by walking toward the crowd and attacking an audience member. And in Asia, there’s been a string of karaoke-bar stabbings and shootings, including a horrific incident in Bangkok in which eight amateur singers were murdered by their neighbor, reportedly due in part to his hatred of John Denver’s “Country Roads.”

While I have never been driven to a murderous rage by a John Denver song, I can understand this man’s actions.  Someone once got out a CD and tried to show me how John Tesh wasn’t as bad as I’d made him out to be.  It was all I could do not to deck him.

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Title: Football For Dummies

Authors: Howie Long & John Czarnecki

Rank: 43,026

Blurb: “Once you break through that initial fear of being overwhelmed by football and what you don’t understand, I know everything else about the game, like dominoes, will fall into place.”

Review: “The Canadian Pro Football League, which started 11 years before that other overrated Pro outdoor League down south, has not never will be and isn’t a ‘feeder’ or ‘AAA’ League for the NFL. The NFL has nothing to be smug about after that lousy Super Bowl XL!”

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