This is Herman Cain!

Why, yes, Mr. Cain, we have a question! Are you fucking nuts?

[via Political Wire]

Update: “This video has been removed as a violation of YouTube’s policy against spam, scams, and commercially deceptive content.” And bunny-whacking.

We’ve replaced the YouTube version with Politico’s version.

Update 2: YouTube version’s back up (and back here), no explanation. Our hunch: Somebody pranked Cain! by complaining about the violence.

Back in college, we ran for student-body preznident. We promised nothing, played solitaire at the debate — and came within twenty-five votes of the runoff.

The next year, we recruited thirty-one of our friends to run for preznident, because students demanded a choice. It was the longest ballot in campus history.

We called it “participatory satire”, and we were quite proud.

So when we heard that Stephen Colbert — who announced too late for the South Carolina primary, which doesn’t allow write-ins — solved the problem yesterday by claiming Herman Cain!’s votes for his own, it felt like old times. Especially the part where he asked Democrats to vote on the Republican open ballot this Saturday.

The emailed press release, after the break.

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Herman Cain! will be announcing his intentions in a few minutes. Let’s tune in!

Robin Haraway, Millington, TN:

“Sir, I firmly believe that you were sent to our nation through Divine Providence and I believe that you are the man to preserve our Republic for our children. Remember, you have overcome many adversities in your life. You have pulled yourself up by your bootstraps through sheer determination and honesty. You were delivered from cancer. My prayers are for strength and guidance for you and your beautiful family this weekend.”

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“My wife did not know about it, and that was the revelation. My wife found out about it when [Ginger White] went public with it… My wife and I have talked about it, and I have explained it to her. My wife understands that I’m a soft-hearted giving person.” [New Hampshire Union-Leader]

“This is cause for reassessment.” —Herman Cain! on a conference call with senior staff this morning, discussing “this recent firestorm that hit the news yesterday”. [NRO]

Our guest columnist is Herman Cain!’s lawyer.

Mr. Cain[!] has been informed today that your television station plans to broadcast a story this evening in which a female will make an accusation that she engaged in a 13-year long physical relationship with Mr. Cain[!]. This is not an accusation of harassment in the workplace — this is not an accusation of an assault — which are subject matters of legitimate inquiry to a political candidate.

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