Meet Your New Muppet

“I can assure you that gay people getting married will have zero effect on your life. They won’t come into your house and steal your children. They won’t magically turn you into a lustful cockmonster.” —Vikings punter Chris Kluwe, responding to marriage defender and Maryland state delegate Emmett C. Burns Jr. Who, before you get ahead of yourself, is a Democrat. [Deadspin]

18 comments:

7:55 pm • Friday • September 7, 2012

Before Smithers gets all excited, it’s not that Mr Burns.

7:59 pm • Friday • September 7, 2012

Based on typical homophobe behavior… I’m pretty sure Mr Burns secretly yearns to be a lustful cockmonster.

Kind of tired today because the Canada City IFC aired American Beauty (hadn’t seen it) at midnight. Stayed up till 3am to watch it.

10:01 pm • Friday • September 7, 2012

Personal TJ: Fired today. Life sucks.

Wonder if it’s me.

10:14 pm • Friday • September 7, 2012

Incidentally, lustful cockmonster sounds pretty good to me. And yes, Benedick, I am just sayin’ .

10:37 pm • Friday • September 7, 2012

Sorry to hear that, Tommmcatt May Just Have Some MJ In His System As Well, So What?. I think I’ll be joining you soon. I don’t think I’m going to last much longer at my current job. Let’s get drunk(er).

10:37 pm • Friday • September 7, 2012

@Tommmcatt May Just Have Some MJ In His System As Well, So What?: The fuck? Was it a last in, first out thing? At any rate, that’s a bummer. May you drink heartily tonight.

11:06 pm • Friday • September 7, 2012

@Tommmcatt May Just Have Some MJ In His System As Well, So What?: I’m so sorry to hear your bad news.
You deserve better, and maybe better is on its way to you even now. Be very good to yourself.

11:17 pm • Friday • September 7, 2012

@Tommmcatt May Just Have Some MJ In His System As Well, So What?: That sucks, sweetie. So sorry.
If it helps, you’ll always be our lustful cockmonster.

11:57 pm • Friday • September 7, 2012

@Mistress Cynica: Oh, darling, you always know just what to say.

11:59 pm • Friday • September 7, 2012

@mellbell: nah. Assholes gotta be assholes, I’m afraid. Stil will I drink, for there is a God in heaven and I don’t give a fuck. Much.

You should go Chainsaw on them. I wish I had.

12:42 am • Saturday • September 8, 2012
1:07 am • Saturday • September 8, 2012

@Tommmcatt May Just Have Some MJ In His System As Well, So What?: any excuse to get rid of staff – they’ve used the recession to lower my rate by 30% despite the fact that there has been no less need for litigation support. You will find something soon.

1:35 am • Saturday • September 8, 2012

@Tommmcatt May Just Have Some MJ In His System As Well, So What?: What.The.Fuck? No it’s not you, our lustful cockmaster. I need to get to El Ay to get out with you and Dodger and Cassandra Said.

@TJ/ Jamie Sommers /TJ: Whiskey.Tango.Foxtrot. Oh, and I’m going to be in the 602 a lot in the next couple months. We need to figure out a Southwest Stinque Up with Karen and maybe RML can be passing through, too.

@blogenfreude: Jesus H. The 0.00001% won’t be happy until we’re all making $2 a day, like that crazy rich Aussie bitch said, right? Time for you to build another water bottle pyramid fortress, and whip out a Julia Child recipe.

2:09 am • Saturday • September 8, 2012

@SanFranLefty: That would be lovely!

I’m in Tempe now, at least for some duration. My landlady thought she could get twice as much for the space as I was paying so I found someone down here who needed a roommate. Of course, a week before I was scheduled to move landlady called to ask if I could stay because the person she thought she had lined up backed out. I declined because she would have ended up jamming me at some point with more talk about snowbirds with $$. Plus I was sick to death of no stove, no oven and nothing but a half size fridge/freezer that couldn’t keep a predictable temperature, and the god-damned rattlesnakes, tarantulas, scorpions, coyotes and javelinas, or the threat of Lucy getting Valley Fever from playing in the same yard where her dog caught it.

I think I’ll go make some chocolate pudding on the proper stove I now have access to.

4:01 am • Saturday • September 8, 2012

@Tommmcatt May Just Have Some MJ In His System As Well, So What?: I’m so sorry to hear that. Just when I thought we’d finally got you off the street. Of course you’ll find something better but it’s shiteous nonetheless. If you need me to come out there and sneer at people you just say the word.

@karen marie still has her eyes tight shut: You make it sound like paradise. All I worry about here are yellow jackets attacking the pugs in the woods. It’s happened once and does not need to be repeated.

I planted a group of flowering crabapples for Bruno who died a couple of weeks back. I was with him. The vet came here to the house. I had the trees planted quite close so when they grow they’ll form one spreading crown. Flowers in the spring and then fruit for the birds later. The leaves are a brindled red and dark green that is almost the color of his coat.

7:28 pm • Saturday • September 8, 2012

@SanFranLefty:

Correction: the .0001% won’t be happy until we’re paid $2.00 a day in the form of a IOU that can only be redeemed at the company store.

And Tomcat, I’m sorry to hear the bad news.

7:42 pm • Saturday • September 8, 2012

@Serolf Divad: So you saw Gina Reinhardt’s little U-tube video too?

Yes we should be so honoured to be employed we should pay to have a job!! (And then home and lick road clean wit’ tongue.)

In the meantime we can ignore the “Harvester” judgement that said wages should be bountiful enough to raise a family, but frugal enough not to lead to excesses.

11:49 pm • Saturday • September 8, 2012

@CheapBoy: Oh hai our Stinquer Down Under!

Yeah, what’s up with that crazy miner’s daughter who inherited a multi-billion fortune but kvetches because the greedy Aussies won’t settle for A$2/day?

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