Orly’s Got Spunk. The Judge Hates Spunk.

Bwa, ha ha ha ha ha ha! Yeah… that’s the ticket… any judge who owns stock in Microsoft has to recuse himself… ha ha ha. Let’s see… that leaves… Judge Wopner?

Oh, nojo. It gets better. She wants a trial on whether she should be fined.

“This filing CONTEMPTUOUSLY ignores the Court’s previous admonition that Plaintiff’s counsel discontinue her illegitimate use of the federal judiciary to further her political agenda.” (all caps and bold italic highlighting added for emphasis). [Like a right-wing nutjob ever needs a reason to break out the ALL CAPS. --Ed.] If the words “penalty” and “contemptuously” be taken at face value, then indeed, the undersigned counsel is entitled to certain protections, including a trial-by-jury.

Wow. But there may be a more rational explanation. She’s stoned.

This is clearly one of the situations in which the line demarcating “law” and “politics” is extremely unclear. “Politics” is, after all, the process by which “beliefs” become law. The original Plaintiff in this case, Captain Connie Rhodes retained the undersigned counsel for the purpose of advocating her “belief” that the words of the United States Constitution mean something more than dust in the wind, especially in light of her commissioned officer’s oath to uphold the Constitution, regarding which highly meaningful and significant oath this Court has never written a single word.

Dust in the wind. Orly is just dust in the wind.

@chicago bureau: Her writing style isn’t bad for a wacko. Did she go to Yale?

Dodgerblue: No. But it does have a certain flavor — like a freshman essay on constituional law. A freshman in high school, I mean.

@chicago bureau: My Senior Comp teacher in high school, the ball-busting Mrs. Barbarini, taught me how to write. She had high standards and was willing to rip your work in front of your classmates. We were terrified of her.

Cooler, eight veeks.

So, Legal Beagles, what happens next? Does she appeal the inevitable fine? Does she have grounds for it being excessive? How much longer can she string this out? And how many more conspiracy theories can she stuff into it?

@nojo: I’ve seen litigants like her – they keep talking and talking – “my child support isn’t fair” or “but he wrecked my car”. They don’t get it that, once the gavel comes down, the show is over. Orly will spend a month or so in jail – the first Birther martyr.

@blogenfreude: Better, they just letter her wander the hallways of Federal justice buildings in California forover, pounding on clerks’ counters, sobbing and shrieking, ‘Neegro eez not president! Neegro eez usurper of great power USA and musleem fazcist! You muzt leezin!” like some twisted psychopath lost in her own hatred and fear, right out of a Rod Serling classic.

@nojo: Throwing the word “contemptuously” into a pleading sets her up for an easy contempt of court. I’m with Bloggie – she’s trying to set herself up to be the Joan of Arc of the Birther Teabaggers. Either that or the judge will have her civilly committed to the Georgia loony bin.

The law.stinque.com CSB complaint continues to write itself.

@SanFranLefty: You and the attorneys here have to write that puppy and get it posted. I know Mike at CandL will pick it up and make you famouser.

@FlyingChainSaw: Yeah, except DB and SFL can’t sign it with our Stinque monikers. I don’t want to attract the wrath of the teabaggers IRL. They scare me.

@SanFranLefty: Fuck ‘em, they can’t take the truth.

@SanFranLefty: she’s trying to set herself up to be the Joan of Arc of the Birther Teabaggers

You make that sound like a considered position.

I think she really is that unhinged — she’s positing a conspiracy theory around Land that matches the conspiracy around the birth certificate. If you oppose her, you’re one of them.

Yes, the result will be a useful martyrdom. But that’s not the intent.