Also-Rans
| Candidate | Pros | Cons | |
|---|---|---|---|
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Clifford | Big. Also, red. | Clashes with Michelle’s wardrobe |
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Droopy | Calm | Senate term incomplete |
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Sam | Vigilant | Punches out at five |
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Scooby | Friendly | Failed urine test |
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Brian | Urbane | Racist |
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Old Yeller | Loyal | Dead |
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Gir | Somewhat faithful | Robot |
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Bill | None | Cat |













8:49 am • Monday • April 13, 2009
What about dear Snoopy? Oh right, yappy beagle and a little loopy with dreams of shooting down the Red Baron. That and his friend Woodstock’s heroin problem.