Okay, now we get Will Smith’s reference while mangling his Oscar presentation — something to do with a college sportscaster, or maybe Jimmie Walker. And if Barry trips over a line during tonight’s Not-the-State-of-the-Union Address, he has a go-to catchphrase at hand. It even refers to hoops footage, which would tie everything together. Not to mention Mr. Smith on record wanting to play Obama in the biopic.

And if you survived that introduction, you’re welcome to participate in our Not-SOTU Open Thread/Good Times Singalong, which is also eerily appropriate tonight: Temporary layoffs. Easy credit ripoffs. Scratchin’ and surviving. Hangin’ in a chow line. Next year, if we’re lucky, we can do Movin’ On Up instead.

One of these Wendys is not like the other.

hyp·o·crite
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English ypocrite, from Anglo-French, from Late Latin hypocrita, from Greek hypokritēs actor, hypocrite, from hypokrinesthai
Date:  13th century
1. a person who puts on a false appearance of virtue or religion;
2. a person who acts in contradiction to his or her stated beliefs or feelings.

Senator David Vitter (R-LA) has called on Senator Roland Burris (D-IL) to resign. Senator Vitter, you’ll recall, refused to resign when exposed as a hooker fucker.

Despite his own refusal to resign after admitting to being a former patron of the “DC Madam”, Vitter dismissed the notion that his demands of Burris are hypocritical. “I honestly don’t know anybody who would compare these situations. They are dramatically different,” Vitter said.

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Back in the day, what drew us to Gawker websites was the voice of their writers. Ana Marie. Mark (and later, Seth). Jessica (and later, Jesse). Even Ken at Sploid, before he turned into an asshat.

It wasn’t about the “news” — you can get news anywhere — and it really wasn’t about the attitude. It was about their humanity, expressed in the joy and pain of cranking out a dozen posts a day. The sites were blogs, and their hosts were personable, like friends at a party.

All of which peaked long ago. With each staff and design change, Gawker Media has been peeling off the very things that made it work.

And now, there’s nothing left.

The last thread that tied us to Gawker Media’s Golden Age was cut Sunday, when Defamer was folded into the Mothership and Seth Abramovitch relieved of his duties. Their Oscar liveblog — the highlight of the Defamer year — was his last post.

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1. Has anybody seen Bobby Jindal’s birth certificate? WHAT IS HE HIDING FROM US?

2. Interesting that I haven’t seen Sen. Richard Shelby come out and DEMAND proof of Jindal’s citizenship. CONSPIRACY!

News that three-quarters of Loyal Bushies remain unemployed has given libtards everywhere a healthy and enjoyable dose of schadenfreude.  Paul Krugman thinks this might be a sign that the days of wingnut welfare are over:

As an economist, I’m supposed to believe in incentives; and the remarkable cohesiveness of conservatives has a lot to do with incentives.

Show some independence, and you’ll face a lavishly financed primary challenge from the Club for Growth. Be a loyal soldier, and you will be taken care of — through what’s commonly referred to as “wingnut welfare.”

Remember when Scooter went to The Hudson Institute to be a “scholar”? – well, he was until he was convicted of multiple felonies and they disappeared him.

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Five beers into the Oscars — the opening dance number had that effect on us — we realized we hadn’t thought about the Monday morning post, and we couldn’t concentrate enough to study RML’s tip about the Canadian terrorist threat.

Not when we were additionally addled to see George Bush still in the news. No, not the George Bush who’s applying as a greeter at Elliott’s Hardware in Houston. And not Poppy, either, who tried retail work but was thwarted by the scanners.

Please, sit down. Clear your desk of sharp objects. Because there’s a third George Bush. And he’s gonna be around a long time.

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Speaking of naked hairy guys, we were watching the night of the Oscar Streaker, and we remember David Niven’s zinger: “Isn’t it fascinating to think that probably the only laugh that man will ever get in his life is by stripping off and showing his shortcomings!” Later we heard the whole thing was staged, but we refuse to believe it. This is Hollywood! Why would they sully their integrity?

We doubt tonight will offer such excitement, but we’re revving up our Open Thread/Party Tent anyway. The new producers and host Wolverine promise a streamlined show, but we offer this bit of friendly advice: Don’t fuck with the Death Montage.